my in-laws....HELP!!!!!!!!!

michlingle
michlingle Posts: 797 Member
edited September 19 in Motivation and Support
Ok, so here's my rant. My sister-in-law and mother-in-law are both morbidly obese, my niece is following suit. They are diabetic and have numerous other ailments due to their size, however. Neither admits or changes their habits even though their weight is literally killing them. It's like the elephant in the room no one wants to mention. Second of all, they give me gifts that are 3x or sometimes 4x in size that are obvious regifts/unwanted items from their closet floor. I am done not saying anything about this. FOr my wedding shower, I got 3x lingerie. I was a size 10 when I got married. Granted, I've put on a few since then, but NEVER over a size 14. Now I'm an 8/10 and have 10 pounds to go. I feel great and I am sick of this ****. My dh wants me to watch the sugar/fat ingredients for the Christmas day brunch we're making. I tell him what's the point. I'm done dealing with their passive agressive way of not accepting me because I do not partake in chinese buffets or their sedentary lifestyle. I'm done with them. And when I have children, my in-laws will not stuff their faces with the crap that has put them in the situation they are in. I will not raise my children to be gluttonous and over-indulged with food and material items. No way, no way. If I get another gift that is obviously too big for me, I will politely ask for the receipt as they must have made a mistake. I know for sure a receipt for this item does not exist. Finally, she will be confronted about the fact that her gifts come off her closet floor and that she tries to pawn her garbage on other people.

Now I have to go to church with all of them tomorrow and take a picture in a holiday shirt (i do not do holiday shirts) that she bought for me with stupid presents on the front. OH, and she asks what size do I want since we're all going to match...XL or L. She says her daughter tried on the L (she's 14 by the way and over 200 pounds) and it was too tight on her so maybe I should go with the XL. Yeah, tried on the large, it's too big. I'm so done...I will order my nice low cal low fat salad tomorrow after church when we all go out for dinner and be so happy about my situation. I will never be a prisoner in my own body. For awhile I was sluggish, now I run and am so active. Never never never.

Thanks for reading my rant.

Replies

  • michlingle
    michlingle Posts: 797 Member
    Ok, so here's my rant. My sister-in-law and mother-in-law are both morbidly obese, my niece is following suit. They are diabetic and have numerous other ailments due to their size, however. Neither admits or changes their habits even though their weight is literally killing them. It's like the elephant in the room no one wants to mention. Second of all, they give me gifts that are 3x or sometimes 4x in size that are obvious regifts/unwanted items from their closet floor. I am done not saying anything about this. FOr my wedding shower, I got 3x lingerie. I was a size 10 when I got married. Granted, I've put on a few since then, but NEVER over a size 14. Now I'm an 8/10 and have 10 pounds to go. I feel great and I am sick of this ****. My dh wants me to watch the sugar/fat ingredients for the Christmas day brunch we're making. I tell him what's the point. I'm done dealing with their passive agressive way of not accepting me because I do not partake in chinese buffets or their sedentary lifestyle. I'm done with them. And when I have children, my in-laws will not stuff their faces with the crap that has put them in the situation they are in. I will not raise my children to be gluttonous and over-indulged with food and material items. No way, no way. If I get another gift that is obviously too big for me, I will politely ask for the receipt as they must have made a mistake. I know for sure a receipt for this item does not exist. Finally, she will be confronted about the fact that her gifts come off her closet floor and that she tries to pawn her garbage on other people.

    Now I have to go to church with all of them tomorrow and take a picture in a holiday shirt (i do not do holiday shirts) that she bought for me with stupid presents on the front. OH, and she asks what size do I want since we're all going to match...XL or L. She says her daughter tried on the L (she's 14 by the way and over 200 pounds) and it was too tight on her so maybe I should go with the XL. Yeah, tried on the large, it's too big. I'm so done...I will order my nice low cal low fat salad tomorrow after church when we all go out for dinner and be so happy about my situation. I will never be a prisoner in my own body. For awhile I was sluggish, now I run and am so active. Never never never.

    Thanks for reading my rant.
  • vickyt
    vickyt Posts: 110 Member
    LOVE IT!!!! You need to let them know what you think and how you feel, it rediculous the way they are treating you. Congrats for not being like them and not wanting to raise your kids like them! I applaud you! Good luck tomorrow! Hope it goes well.
  • chipper15173
    chipper15173 Posts: 3,981 Member
    stick up for yourself.....it's a must.
    remembering back when i had seen my MIL she was telling me a story about my ex-SIL, saying how big she was comparing her to a house and all and than says "just a little bit bigger than you". i just cried to myself. i was in shock to say anything. i was large at the time and had low selfesteem anyway. than after i started losing she would make comments. i made comments back. as she continued i continued, but got rude. DH just sat back and watched he was on my side. now she doesn't say a word to me about weight.
    :drinker: we must all take a stand for ourself.:drinker:

    good luck
  • nwfamilygal
    nwfamilygal Posts: 635
    sounds to me like they are jealous of you. But they don't have the will power to do anything about them selves. You just keep up the good work. Your doing great. When you have children teach then the right way and they won't be where a lot of us are today. But were all doing something about it and that is the key. Getting healthy Yeah! Have a great day tomorrow. A toast to you:drinker: Keep up the good work :flowerforyou:
  • lisarae
    lisarae Posts: 113
    Sadly familiar. My mom and MIL are larger. I eat a specific diet and get ridiculed whenever we have get togethers. I used to be like them, eating bad food and feeling worse. Understand it is THEIR issue. THEIR jealousy and insecurity.
    Stand up for yourself, please, or it will build. Smile when you zip up your small jeans and remember that you are being healthy and taking care of yourself. My MIL and mother have a plethora of health issues due to their weight. They don't seem to see the connection. I do and find it maddening. Hang in there. Ahhh, family time. So special! haha
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
    I am the one who smooths things over. I figure, only see them once every 2 years, I can let it go.

    This time all of us are at the beach. I have lost a few pounds....but I had been exercising so I feel fantastic. My sil drinks no less than a case of beer a day. So we order pizza one night, I get a small thin, lite cheese, lite sauce, all veggies.

    Someone says to me that I am the ONLY one who will eat that ****. I said I'll tell ya what, I wont drink your beer or take your high blood pressure meds, and you dont have to eat my pizza.

    Btw, the kids LOVED my pizza!

    :noway:
  • michlingle
    michlingle Posts: 797 Member
    Aww you guys :) thank you for responding to my rant. Generally, when I post here no one responds! My husband just joined the new gym that opened near our house. He says diabetes runs in his family...that's bull. You get the diabetes his family has by being obese. So regardless he is coming toward the light and I hope that he gets healthy along with me. He has about 30 to lose like I did. Guess it's happy marriage (newlywed) weight.
  • lsalazarii
    lsalazarii Posts: 144 Member
    I think everyone has this problem with the ones that are overweight and don't want to correct the problem. I have friends that are overweight and I love them dearly.... but they do hurt your feelings when they say things like... I made this but I'm sure you won't try it because you want to be skinny or you're not fun anymore since you don't eat like you use to....HUH??????

    Don't worry about others.... take care of yourself.... that is what is important.
  • nellienell12
    nellienell12 Posts: 325 Member
    Girl, you don't look any larger than a Medium. You need to stand up and say something. Luckily, my SIL and MIL are overweight and they don't say anything to me. But, my neice is very over weight and I feel sorry for her sometimes because she is 18 and I know how it is to be young and big. Plus, my MIL has been in the hospital with her diabetes and still does nothing to control, hubby gets very upset about it.

    Anyways, good luck with that. Hope everything works out.
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