Can't get into the right mindset. Help!

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We are all wired differently, so I can't tell you what's best for you, but I can tell you what I would do for myself.

I'd try to break the connection between food and exercise first of all, especially since it doesn't seem to work to your benefit anyway. This may sound like a strange advice as both nutrition and exercise are helpful for weight loss, but this connection is what made me fail the other time. Strict diet and exercise can prove to be a heavy burden for someone who just jumped into it and the willpower is not endless. There are also a lot of possible reasons you may want to put exercise on hold (days of the month, sickness, injuries, awful weather, guests or vacation etc). If your eating well depends on it, you are doomed.

This time I've started at the moment when exercise was physically impossible for me. The option just wasn't on the table. But I've started to watch what I eat knowing that this will give me results anyway. Now I've gotten a bit better and I'm adding exercise slowly as a bonus on the top of what I'm doing with my diet. But I know that if I can't exercise again for some reason, it may get a bit slower, but I'll still be on the way down, because not going over my calories is doable in most life situations. And exercise may be there or not.

As for stuffing your face, try to find the point where it goes wrong. Is it hunger or is it craving particular foods you can't refuse? If it's a matter of not feeling full, give what you eat another look. I'm on a 1200 cal diet and once I started eating more lean meat and vegetables, I was very amused to see myself struggling to get close to my goal. I felt I was stuffing myself with food and yet the counter remained below the goal quite a bit. I actually had to add treats to hit the goal. As a result I eat ice-cream and chocolate pretty much every day. And this is what you can do if the problem is not wanting to refuse foods you love. Eat them every day, few times a day even, just make sure the amounts are small. Make yourself full with more filling food and then eat what you love for the taste itself.

And yes, counting calories makes things so much easier. When you know the calorie cost of things, a lot of them start to seem not worth it. It goes from 'do I want that cookie? - hm.. cookie, sweet, yeah maybe sure' to 'do I want that cookie for 1/6 of my daily budget? - hell, NO. I love ice-cream more anyway and I can have some for half that price!'.

Also I would not count on things like proper mindset, motivation, willpower etc to guide you through this journey. They are kind of friends that betray. Sooner or later you'll find yourself in a situation when you need them the most and they are just not there. Voice of reason, knowledge, habits are much more trustworthy. Start at the wrong moment, face your challenges early when you have the least to lose. Find what works for you in whatever situation and then just keep doing it without a superhero suit. You don't need it. It's only hard when we make it hard.

Good luck! Even if you don't need luck to achieve results, having some never harms

You have to simply take one day at a time and build on it. You cna cope with one day. When you get home you have to make a choice, stuff your face or do not wth the obvious results of either. If you stuff your face then you cnat want to lose weight badly enough and are happy to destri any deficit you might have created.

Dont forget the lare majority of your deficit is created by controlling your consumption at home.
Commit and become clear in your purpose and goal. Eating moe thna your allowance will reduce your deficit or even send you into suprplus, which hampres the effeciveness of your diet.

If you cnat keep to this then examine whether your calories arent too low and deficit too aggressive.

Wow this really is a brilliant place the support is excellent and feel free to add me i can always do with help and support

Remember to clean out your cupboards of ALL junk foods! Read all labels and decide if it should stay or go! My general rule is if I can't say the ingredients or know what it is-- it goes!!!!!
Make a meal plan for a week or 2. You can do all your basic cooking for the week and measure everything out. Remember spices are your friend-- they change flavours!!

You need to focus on your own personal reasons why you want to lose weight and be very specific. Try and visualise clearly what it would be like to reach your goals. Then keep those very specific reasons and visualisations in your mind next time you reach for the junk food or don't feel like exercising :-)