No Longer Scorned <3

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xing57
xing57 Posts: 4 Member
in Success Stories
Hey! Just wanted to share this with whoever will read it ^^

One year ago I was overweight. I was known as the fat girl in school and all that stuff. My parents forbade me to eat candy and snacks and I was even desperate enough to sneak it behind their backs. They always said things like "you're one of the fattest girls in your school" etc. I lost 25lb and grew 1 inch in the past year. I guess I'm normal weight now at 120lb and 5'4" but my past and being known as "fat" has made me so self conscious... I just want to lose more, especially being constantly compared to my cousin who is the same height as me but 20lb less.

Sorry for venting

Replies

  • Earthgirl51
    Earthgirl51 Posts: 73 Member
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    congratulations on your 25lb. loss. It is difficult to be the fat kid. It is even more difficult to be compared to some one else and be found lacking. I hope you come to realize that you are in a healthy zone and you don't need to lose more weight. Losing too much is worse than being fat IMHO. Good Luck and feel free to vent whenever you need too.
  • ronronronj
    ronronronj Posts: 474 Member
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    Congrats on your achievement so far. It is a terrible fact of life that kids in school can be particularly cruel. It is during times like these you remember who your friends are. Best of luck in reaching your ultimate goal, but don't let any comparisons with your cousin (or anyone else) bother you. If necessary, see a doctor to get an accurate assessment.
  • lapointesl
    lapointesl Posts: 2 Member
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    You're doing great! Forget about comparing yourself to someone else!!! I was overweight growing up and always the butt of someones comments.... It's what you think about yourself that's important!! I'm many years removed from those earlier years but the best things in life find you when your not looking for them...today I'm married 40 years with 3 children and 8 grand children. Good things await you....There's a scripture that says" Trust in the Lord with your whole heart and lean not unto your own understanding"... Be patient, have faith ! ....SLL
  • NewLIFEstyle4ME
    NewLIFEstyle4ME Posts: 4,440 Member
    edited May 2015
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    Girlfriend, I totally know what you mean. You're a winner, period. Super GOOD job!

    It's easier said than done, but try not to compare yourself with others ( FYI--I'm talking to myself and letting you listen) :love: --if you do compare yourself with others, try to please or keep up with others, you'll be constantly jumping thru someone elses hoops and always feeling inadequate and NEVER feeling good about yourself. Here's some food for thought:

    “Comparison is the death of joy.”
    ― Mark Twain

    “The battle you are going through is not fueled by the words or actions of others; it is fueled by the mind that gives it importance.”
    ― Shannon L. Alder


    I cannot say this too strongly: Do not compare yourselves to others. Be true to who you are, and continue to learn with all your might.”
    ― Daisaku Ikeda, Discussions on Youth

    “You will be bitter in life, when you compare yourself with others.Run the race of life at your own pace.”
    ― Lailah Gifty Akita


    “How much time he gains who does not look to see what his neighbour says or does or thinks, but only at what he does himself, to make it just and holy.”
    ― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

    Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.
    Martin Luther King, Jr.


    The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
    Mahatma Gandhi


    Never forget the three powerful resources you always have available to you: love, prayer, and forgiveness.
    H. Jackson Brown, Jr.


    When you forgive, you in no way change the past - but you sure do change the future.
    Bernard Meltzer


    Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.
    Mark Twain


    Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.
    Oscar Wilde











  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,150 Member
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    Seriously, I'm sad that your own parents would be that hurtful. Way to go on your loss. Be happy with you and where you are in life. Everything else will follow.
  • peachyfuzzle
    peachyfuzzle Posts: 1,122 Member
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    Your parents sound like total dbags.
  • Nyappykim
    Nyappykim Posts: 57 Member
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    I can totally understand where you're coming from. Seems to be an Asian thing unfortunately. ): All my life, I've been at the top of the healthy BMI weight so I've always carried around some extra weight. My parents, relatives, and parents' friends would ALWAYS make comments about my weight. I understand now that they didn't mean it in a cruel way but that stuff still gets to you. But anyway, it was only until the moment I went past that line between healthy and overweight when I really wanted to lose it - but for me! Don't let anyone's opinions drag you down, do things for yourself because you want to and awesome job on the weight loss.
  • barbecuesauce
    barbecuesauce Posts: 1,771 Member
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    peachyfuzzle wrote: »
    Your parents sound like total dbags.

    Yup. Especially since she is young enough that she is continuing to grow (I stopped at 11 or 12 so I don't even want to think about what you're doing here, OP). Asian parents or no, that's still going to hurt you. I'm sorry.
  • angeltilo
    angeltilo Posts: 44 Member
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    Weighing 120 at 5'4" is completely normal. I find it hard to believe you were the "fattest girl in school" even at 5'3" and 145. I'm sure you look fine but maybe some exercise would make you feel better? I used to be "skinny fat"- I was thin but not toned. I wish I had exercised then.
  • dramaqueen45
    dramaqueen45 Posts: 1,009 Member
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    I'm 5'4" and 120 is my ultimate goal weight. I weighed that when I got married and it is a very healthy weight for that height. Even now I am about what you weighed when you thought you were the "fat girl" and I'm on the high end of the healthy weight category for my height. Sorry your parents were hurtful. Learn to love yourself- no matter what your size.
  • crazyjerseygirl
    crazyjerseygirl Posts: 1,252 Member
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    Hrm, your parents sound like jerks. There are other words to use, but they'll just get started out.

    Everyone is saying, rightly, that you shouldn't compare yourself to another person. There are several reasons for this.

    Bone structure. Yours might be thicker, heartier, weigh more. You can't do much about a heavy skeleton.

    Muscle mass. Might have more lean muscle. That can be natural and push your weight up too.

    So there really no point in comparison, even at the same height if you aren't sure of these other factors as well
  • erojoy
    erojoy Posts: 554 Member
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    I can see your arms in that picture. You are petite. Just love you, and you know what? The rest will work itself out.

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