Does anyone else do well for a few days then have a weird panicked binge??

Options
nicola8989
nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
My calories aren't too low, they're 1700 - I sometimes crave certain foods but I'm rarely hungry. I haven't cut anything out of my diet I still eat chocolate etc just in moderation. I'll have a run of good days - normally about 3, of sticking to my calories and exercising - then I just seem to have a weird panic and stuff my face. it's just like a loss of control. What can I do to make it stop? I bought a big lunch and pack of cookies today and ate one, then I realised what I was doing and put them on the staff-room table for other people to eat. But even so I'm going to be way over my calories - I just put away a 1000 cal lunch.

I have a history of binge eating and bulimia. I am just sickened with myself.

Replies

  • kikichewie
    kikichewie Posts: 276 Member
    Options
    Hmmmm. Sounds like it's related to your history....

    Do you log things before you eat them? Prelog what you plan on having for dinner in the morning or the day before so you can fit everything into your day? If you log in advance and think about it before you're hungry or before you need to go to the store or choose a restaurant, there is less reason for you to "accidentally" eat a meal that takes up most of your day's calories (unless it's on purpose like a splurge dinner).

    I do better when I log in advance, and especially when I think a few days in advance.

    I took my average daily calorie allotment and adjusted it so that I eat fewer calories during the work week and more on the weekend when I know I'll want to eat out. It's made it so much easier. I even change my goal manually every day so I don't have to do any extra math to keep track. It's so much easier than fighting to stay as low on the weekends as I do during the week when there is less fun stuff going on. Maybe try that? Then you know a higher calorie day is always right around the corner, but you're not cheating at all! You're still on plan!
  • Michael190lbs
    Michael190lbs Posts: 1,510 Member
    edited May 2015
    Options
    I would be dead if it wasn't for pistachios and although its normally a 350 calorie binge I work it into my calories everyday!! I freaking LOVE THEM!!! My clemetine oranges are also a great treat!!
  • galaxyeyed
    galaxyeyed Posts: 98 Member
    Options
    Just throwing it out there that you may need to talk to a therapist or professional given your history. Try to remember that YOU are the one in control, not the food. It's also often helpful to look back at the times you binged and figure out why you felt you had to. Were you feeling stressed, bored, sad, etc. Then you may be able to realize what your triggers are. It sounds like you're already doing better by not eating all of the cookies! Next time if you get a big lunch, maybe try to only eat half. Best of luck.
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    Options
    With eating disorders involved into your equation of eating habits, it seems that you may need to to speak with a doctor etc...

    If I had not seen that you had ED's I might have been able to post something else other than to seek treatment.
  • thetanyacam
    thetanyacam Posts: 35 Member
    Options
    I feel the same way. Everyday I struggle. And then it hits.One day at a time. I keep focussed on getting healthy not just skinny.
  • nicola8989
    nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
    Options
    thank you - pre-logging has helped an awful lot but I keep stumbling.

    I did feel like not eating all of the cookies was a step forward - I felt a lot more mindful of what I was doing. I don't know if I'm just kidding myself that it's a real achievement though.

    I have seen a therapist which helped a lot.
  • nicola8989
    nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
    Options
    I used to have weekends with higher calories which helped a lot but a lot of people said I might be blowing all my hard work during the week
  • nicola8989
    nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
    Options
    to me - I had 900 cals remaining yesterday - I'm -900 today - so I've just cancelled out one day? But does it really work that way?
  • sandryc79
    sandryc79 Posts: 250 Member
    Options
    nicola8989 wrote: »
    My calories aren't too low, they're 1700 - I sometimes crave certain foods but I'm rarely hungry. I haven't cut anything out of my diet I still eat chocolate etc just in moderation. I'll have a run of good days - normally about 3, of sticking to my calories and exercising - then I just seem to have a weird panic and stuff my face. it's just like a loss of control. What can I do to make it stop? I bought a big lunch and pack of cookies today and ate one, then I realised what I was doing and put them on the staff-room table for other people to eat. But even so I'm going to be way over my calories - I just put away a 1000 cal lunch.

    I have a history of binge eating and bulimia. I am just sickened with myself.

    The majority of people here, even those like myself who have a history of binge eating and bulemia just are not qualified to help you with this. It isn't some lack of will power on your part. There isn't a magical series of actions someone will advise you of over the internet that makes this cycle stop. It isn't your fault and it is an eating disorder. Eating disorders have some pretty complex causes and different treatments work for different people. Definitely get some good professional advice. Calorie counting is often a trigger for binging in people with ED.
  • nicola8989
    nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
    Options
    thank you - I've calmed down slightly now - it just feels so horrible when I get like that, I thought binging/bulimia were in the past now xx
  • sunfastrose
    sunfastrose Posts: 543 Member
    Options
    You are defining "doing well" wrong. If I am doing the math correctly from a couple of your posts, you only ate 800 calories yesterday (1700-900). That's too low, and no wonder you are rebounding to eating more - you are hungry! Pre-planning will help there as well as when you think you are heading to a higher calorie day.
  • nicola8989
    nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
    Options
    I didn't eat 800 cals - I had 2 intense workouts that helped me bank calories (sorry for confusion!) xx
  • futuremanda
    futuremanda Posts: 816 Member
    Options
    nicola8989 wrote: »
    to me - I had 900 cals remaining yesterday - I'm -900 today - so I've just cancelled out one day? But does it really work that way?
    nicola8989 wrote: »
    I didn't eat 800 cals - I had 2 intense workouts that helped me bank calories (sorry for confusion!) xx

    Yes. (Assuming you truly burned 900 and that's not an overestimation.)

    But maybe don't bank so many calories and see if that helps.

    The panic and binge thing is definitely related to your disorder. And I agree with others that no one here can help you with that.

    That said, hunger and cravings are only partially related to our calories. Meaning, I could eat 3000 in a day, and that wouldn't *prevent* me from having any more hunger or cravings until my body had burned it all off. Especially if I ate it early in the day -- I'd still want dinner, etc. And that's normal. So even though your calorie goal of 1700 looks fairly comfortable, that does not mean you will always be comfortable. Especially not if you go and burn off like 900 of it!

    Does your "run of good days" always look like this? Eating 1700 but netting like 800? Maybe try planning to eat back half your exercise calories. MFP is designed for you to eat back ALL of those calories, NETTING your target. So if your target is 1700 and you burn off 900, you're actually supposed to be eating 2600 that day. You can eat fewer to "save" some, or as a guard against a cardio machine or a database inflating your burn, but you should probably try eating back a good chunk on a regular basis and see if that helps.

    That and the obvious: Don't go out and buy a huge lunch with a package of cookies on the side, if you haven't prelogged and planned around that. Figure out your lunches ahead of time and follow that plan.
    nicola8989 wrote: »
    I used to have weekends with higher calories which helped a lot but a lot of people said I might be blowing all my hard work during the week

    Your weekends with higher calories might be fine if you are logging it. You can keep track yourself, by looking at Net Calories in the reports tab. If your deficit throughout the week was 1250 (250 a day), then if you ate to maintenance on the weekend, you'd still have a deficit of 1250 going. If you are over maintenance, you'd start to cut into the deficit some. You could watch this if you log, and then you can definitely have "higher calorie days" (just not, I don't know, 3500 calorie days).

    But with eating back some exercise calories, all your days could be higher calorie days. :)
  • nicola8989
    nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
    Options
    thank you - I don't always net 900 on my good days but I do normally have a net of at least 500 on my good days - I don't eat any exercise calories back as I'm a bit dubious about how generous they are. But I might try eating back half and see what happens x
  • futuremanda
    futuremanda Posts: 816 Member
    Options
    nicola8989 wrote: »
    thank you - I don't always net 900 on my good days but I do normally have a net of at least 500 on my good days - I don't eat any exercise calories back as I'm a bit dubious about how generous they are. But I might try eating back half and see what happens x

    MFP wants you to net your target. So try to net 1700 and see how you do. (Assuming 1700 is your target and not just what you typically end up eating.)

    If you like, when you enter the exercise, you can just change the calories. So set it to 450 instead of 900. That'll make it easier to see how many more you are *actually* planning to eat that day, and if you do eat it, your net should be around 1700 (target). Would make it simpler!

    And just to be clear: That recommended minimum 1200 for females is supposed to be net. Meaning, you should try to net at least 1200 (using your best guess at actual exercise burns). If you're netting 500 sometimes, then this really could be part of why you're binging.
  • nicola8989
    nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
    Options
    that's a really good tip thanks - I might start changing the calories so I have a more realistic idea of what I'm burning.
  • morelimesplease
    morelimesplease Posts: 11 Member
    Options
    Yeah, I got that panic very badly at the start. I still get it sometimes, especially if I am hungry and about to eat (or during eating to fufill hunger). What's worked for me is taking a deep breath, closing my eyes, and tuning into the taste and texture of what I am both before and after. Then I bring my attention to my stomach to feel/notice that it is already starting to feel fuller. And I remind myself that I don't have to be afraid of hunger, because if I slow down while eating the food will fill me and take the hunger away. I also drink water while doing that.
  • nicola8989
    nicola8989 Posts: 381 Member
    Options
    thank you :) I'm trying to do that - eat more mindfully - I think that's why I was able to stop myself before I ate it all.