Support needed! Dealing with depression and too much trouble.

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Emmatyan
Emmatyan Posts: 87 Member
edited May 2015 in Motivation and Support
Due to reasons I could not control some time ago I was forced to leave my city, my home, my job, my family, my hasband (well, in the last case he left me, which made things even worse), went through the death of a person who I loved most of all in life, and then had to live in constant struggle for a decent life. That was the time when I gained weight. Some time ago I decided if can't change those things, I can at least change my body. I felt like those guys
rtr2n9ty.jpg
If there's nothing else you can do about your situation, do pushups!

I found my inspiration and started a long and hard work. I think I got myself out of depression a little bit with the help of regular exercising (endorphins yay!) but sometimes it catches up with me. Then I feel awful, have no desire to work out and can eat more than I should. And I drink a lot then. And it's not water.
It's just hard for me to be all alone, dealing with everything. Seeing my soon-to-be-abs in the mirror brought me joy and satisfaction, but on these days I feel like this is all for nothing. Noone sees me and says "Wow you look great!!". Nobody knows me here to say it. I know, I know "you are doing it for yourself, not for somebody else", but let's be honest, we wouldn't bother getting a great shape if noone would notice it.
There's no advice for me, I guess. But can I have a little bit of support? It would brighten my crappy day:)

Replies

  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
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    Hang in there you are doing great and you have made great progress. You cna diffeentiate between daus when you get the exercise rush and daus when you get a bit overwhelmed or its a bit meh. They are going to happen so you should have a list of activities and coping strategies to put into place when they come knocking.

    Be your own greatest supporter, it sounds crap what youve been through but a lot of others have been there.
    Just get through the day and maybe do a few nice things for yourself. I try and do at least one every day. Keep hoing and you are one day closer to when it gets better.
  • snickerscharlie
    snickerscharlie Posts: 8,578 Member
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    When you look at what you've already been through and survived, draw strength from that on your weaker days. I've sent you a friend request. :)
  • scottacular
    scottacular Posts: 597 Member
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    I suffer with depression too, it goes round in cycles - some days you feel fine, but you know a day will come when you don't. It's not so much motivation that gets you through, but habit. And at the end of a workout, don't you always feel just that little bit better? It's a good place to aim to be, the post-workout high zone.
  • bas0128
    bas0128 Posts: 52 Member
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    You've been through a lot. Give yourself a little grace.
  • FreedomMK2131
    FreedomMK2131 Posts: 17 Member
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    Depression can be very difficult to cope with, especially since you had so many major life changes at one time. People tend to remain very focused on themselves rather than others, especially when it comes to weight loss. Women DO notice weight loss in their friends/coworkers, but may not say anything due to jealousy, envy, or fear. They might think you are not well and it would be offensive to comment on your loss. It looks to me like you're in a good place and dealing with your stress in healthier ways. Keep close watch on your drinking as it can sneak up on you. Good luck on the rest of your journey!
  • Emmatyan
    Emmatyan Posts: 87 Member
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    FreedomMK2131 wrote: »
    Depression can be very difficult to cope with, especially since you had so many major life changes at one time. People tend to remain very focused on themselves rather than others, especially when it comes to weight loss. Women DO notice weight loss in their friends/coworkers, but may not say anything due to jealousy, envy, or fear. They might think you are not well and it would be offensive to comment on your loss. It looks to me like you're in a good place and dealing with your stress in healthier ways. Keep close watch on your drinking as it can sneak up on you. Good luck on the rest of your journey!

    Thanks for adding me and for the support! I wasn't too clear in my post, I meant as I had to leave my home and city, now I live in a small town and nobody, literally nobody knows me here. Apart from the landlady, but I can't imagine her commenting on my looks :D
  • Emmatyan
    Emmatyan Posts: 87 Member
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    999tigger wrote: »
    snickerscharlie wrote: »
    scottacular wrote: »
    FreedomMK2131 wrote: »
    Thank you for the support guys!

  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
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    Any better today? you need that im depressed today plan so you cna keep it simple and have confidence with the little energy you have that you are doing all the right things to help you get through. It passes, but its nice to hang in there , keep it simple and know you are a bit more in control than you have been peviously. Do a few nice things for yourself today and do a few small things like go for a walk, do the shopping etc to show yourself you cna still function.
  • rd82716
    rd82716 Posts: 18 Member
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    Live in a small town too (30,000). I have the benefit of having grown up here though. Hard to find friends. Hang in there.
  • dpwellman
    dpwellman Posts: 3,271 Member
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    Been there, done that.

    The only thing that really helped, in the end, is to 1) realize that even through the worst, it was never a "waste of time", and 2) I am responsible for the actions I choose to do. I am not responsible for what anyone else does.

    Running helps a lot, though. Solves lots of problems-- except where to get lunch. That one is always a stickler.
  • hypotrochoid
    hypotrochoid Posts: 842 Member
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    Have you seen a doctor about your depression? Exercise helps, but sometimes you need the medication to help balance. I've been there- I went from "yay! Look at me!" to drinking four bottles of wine in a night and staring at razorblades. That was my 'aha' moment to get help. Meds helped even me out until I got to a better place and weaned off them. It takes time, and brain chemistry is stupid and evil.

    I wish you the best; hang in there!
  • rd82716
    rd82716 Posts: 18 Member
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    Brain imbalance is no different than body imbalance. Took me a long time to figure that out and reach for help.
  • catjan
    catjan Posts: 106 Member
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    So good read everyone's supportive words. We all have our own problems, on many levels & it's hard to focus at times. It's a big help to me to know I'm not alone , I hope this helps you too Emmatyan. thank you all x

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