Dysmorphia and summer

mccanns725
mccanns725 Posts: 36 Member
edited November 17 in Goal: Maintaining Weight
i am struggling with dysmorphia. I have no idea what I actually look like to other people. I am very close to my goal weight but getting older means things still look looser than I like. How do I best manage feeling like I still look fat at my goal. My BMI Is 20%. What do you do?

Replies

  • mccanns725
    mccanns725 Posts: 36 Member
    And sorry the title auto corrected as I posted. Grr
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
    Professional help.
  • astrampe
    astrampe Posts: 2,169 Member
    Professional help, and a lifting program where you can concentrate on strengh gains and the joy of the sport, not what you think you look like...
  • husseycd
    husseycd Posts: 814 Member
    Try to focus on what your body can do rather than how it looks. I have a bit of dysmorphia at times too.

    Depending on how severe yours is, I don't know that professional help is necessarily warranted. I'm between 16-18 % body fat (16% per BodPod, 18% per my calipers) and sometimes I feel fluffy. I know it's ridiculous, but I also think it's natural. Uber confidence is probably more unnatural. I'm a 39 year-old woman, btw.
  • cat_lady77
    cat_lady77 Posts: 203 Member
    edited April 2015
    Look around you at other people, especially in the summer. Most people wear shorts & bathing suits without a care in the world, even with a couple extra lbs they may not want. Almost everyone has something they don't love & that's ok. I try to remember that NO ONE is perfect, & me wearing shorts with chubby thighs is not going to cause the world to stop spinning. People can just deal with it. Do what makes YOU happy. Look to others for inspiration, not judgement.
  • sjohnson__1
    sjohnson__1 Posts: 405 Member
    TBH, I think we all have a desire to look "good" to others and sometimes we over analyze our self-image...I think you're normal, and caring isn't a bad thing. Flip it the other way, allow your desire to look and feel good motivate you. But more importantly, focus on the feel good aspect. Forget what others think, it's not your business to know, and you can only control you. Like Karla said, look to others for inspiration, not judgement!
  • jenniferjohnsonament
    jenniferjohnsonament Posts: 85 Member
    I had this issue when I got down to goal.. I felt "fatter" because at goal I could see the fat more. In fact, I could FEEL it. It felt bumpy under my skin...now that I'd lost weight I could no longer hide that my 30s meant less tightness as I had not worked out in years. I could no longer "just" lose weight..I had to burn it off now.

    I started strength training and ate at my maitenance calories. I have lost 12 inches and 1 lb in the last 2 months! I see more difference now with that 1 lb than I did after losing 25!
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
    weight training for sure. Core exercises, barbells and free weights. A good trainer will help you. I did the whole go from machine to machine at LA Fitness. It never did anything for me, and before you think it, you are NOT too old!!
  • Gska17
    Gska17 Posts: 752 Member
    I know where you are coming from. I still don't know quite what I look like (photos help). Also, after 18 pounds I've received one single comment. My sister told me she "really couldn't tell". Huh? I'm down three pant sizes! Oh well.

    I'm not toned and that's ok with me for now. I'm running to stay semi-fit and plan to start a weight class this winter.

    Best of luck to you!
  • gymbunny1962
    gymbunny1962 Posts: 36 Member
    mccanns725 wrote: »
    i am struggling with dysmorphia. I have no idea what I actually look like to other people. I am very close to my goal weight but getting older means things still look looser than I like. How do I best manage feeling like I still look fat at my goal. My BMI Is 20%. What do you do?

    This is me! I lost about 70lbs to get to my current weight and have maintained (more or less) for 5 years. But I have no concept of how I look. I lift weights (heavy) normally 3 days a week and do cardio 3 days a week so not sure how weight training will help. Some days I think I look good, others not so! I know this sounds bizarre but even with issues over self perception, I still know I look good and definitely better than I did 70lbs ago - so much so that I'm quite confident wearing a bikini. You don't say what age you are - I'm just short of 53.
  • onyxgirl17
    onyxgirl17 Posts: 1,722 Member
    karla24687 wrote: »
    Look around you at other people, especially in the summer. Most people wear shorts & bathing suits without a care in the world, even with a couple extra lbs they may not want. Almost everyone has something they don't love & that's ok. I try to remember that NO ONE is perfect, & me wearing shorts with chubby thighs is not going to cause the world to stop spinning. People can just deal with it. Do what makes YOU happy. Look to others for inspiration, not judgement.



    This didn't help me with body dysmorphia. Try not comparing at all. It's a self esteem issue, you have self-esteem, OP may not. Mental battles are not easy to overcome. I also suggest professional help.
  • angellll12
    angellll12 Posts: 296 Member
    mccanns725 wrote: »
    i am struggling with dysmorphia. I have no idea what I actually look like to other people. I am very close to my goal weight but getting older means things still look looser than I like. How do I best manage feeling like I still look fat at my goal. My BMI Is 20%. What do you do?


    Video yourself
  • mccanns725
    mccanns725 Posts: 36 Member
    Thank you for all of the replies. Gym bunny hit closest to where I am. I have had help in the past so I know what the issue is but it is tearing it's head again as old age and the weight gain messed with my image. I am just over 50 and the changes in my body became very pronounced with menopause. I lift, I do cardio and TRX. I'm getting into better and better shape. My brain just needs some help catching up. I think it will take time for me to see myself as I am now.
  • rdlewis123
    rdlewis123 Posts: 106 Member
    I am 49 and beginning to realize I am no longer 30. It sucks! But at the same time, I am healthier now than I was then. Strength training has been a lifesaver for me in reshaping my body. I too am not sure how I REALLY look. I don't think anybody does. After losing 53 pounds, I still see the fat. All I can do is trust those helping me train and take it that I HAVE made the appropriate lifestyle changes that count. My self-perception though is what keeps me motivated to keep going. I don't want to go back to where I was.
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
    rdlewis123 wrote: »
    I am 49 and beginning to realize I am no longer 30. It sucks! But at the same time, I am healthier now than I was then. Strength training has been a lifesaver for me in reshaping my body. I too am not sure how I REALLY look. I don't think anybody does. After losing 53 pounds, I still see the fat. All I can do is trust those helping me train and take it that I HAVE made the appropriate lifestyle changes that count. My self-perception though is what keeps me motivated to keep going. I don't want to go back to where I was.

    You look great!! I agree...weight training is a must when you get to our age. If you are able to do it. I know some 49 year olds who will not try it, due to either a mental or physical barrier.

  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_dysmorphic_disorder
  • blossom015
    blossom015 Posts: 27 Member
    mccanns725 wrote: »
    i am struggling with dysmorphia. I have no idea what I actually look like to other people. I am very close to my goal weight but getting older means things still look looser than I like. How do I best manage feeling like I still look fat at my goal. My BMI Is 20%. What do you do?

    Keep your fitness goals within a healthy range as outlined by a physician. Try creating an inspiration board using only photos of real people, no airbrush work The media plays a huge role in our ideals of beauty rather we're overweight, under weight and/or have never had a weight issue.

    Take some flattering photos of yourself and create a positive message about yourself. Then look at them and repeat the saying daily. Sometimes you have to deprogram yourself from all those media images.

    As for getting older, again media...embrace the amazing things your body can do, set new fitness goals and challenges. Confidence is sexy/attractive at all ages on all genders :)<3
  • louubelle16
    louubelle16 Posts: 579 Member
    I find I can only really see what I look like in a photo - never trust what you see in the mirror. I know this doesn't work for everyone but it helps me. I have, in the past when it got really bad, printed out some photos and stuck them around the mirror so I saw them every time and remembered what I was looking at wasn't real.
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