103lbs lighter (pic heavy)

mrs_joshica · May 2015

All I can say is wow! So, here is my story. I've been in the "big" category my entire life, since early teenage years on. I went from thin to big in what seemed like overnight. I was a size 30-32, and I was scared. I didn't even know clothes came in that size and was afraid that I would eventually have nothing to wear. As scared as I was I was also disappointed from past experiences of failing at losing weight! I tried this fad diet, and that pill, and nothing worked. I never thought to examine my relationship with food, my portion sizes, my sugar intake or fat intake. Food was my comfort. I also never evaluated the fact that WHATEVER YOU DO TO LOSE THE WEIGHT IS WHAT YOU MUST DO TO MAINTAIN IT, and if I was not changing my lifestyle, the few pounds shed would be just that, few, far in between, and come back with friends.

In 2009 I moved to a new city, got a new job. Although this job was sedentary I was no longer working from home, and had no choice but to get up and move around some. Little did I know that without even trying, I would begin to lose weight. Within a few months of my new job my 30/32 turned into a size 28 and I got excited! I thought if I can do this without even trying, Lord knows that I should be able to do this putting in some work. I have stopped, and started and stopped and started so many times that I can't even tell you the numbers. However, in 2011 I got serious about doing something, and although I quit and went back at in 2013, and then quit and went back at it 6 months into last year, I've learned a lot, and lost a whole lot.

I have to say a big thank you to every friend I had on MFP who didn't leave me just because I was no longer active. Losing weight is a journey, you try, and fall down, but in your fall, if you do it right, you learn. I've learned the importance of working out in my target heart range, the importance of listening to my body say "I'm full". I've learned what being an emotional eater meant to my journey, and how to break that cycle. I've learned that falling isn't a bad thing, but staying down is. I've learned that TOM causes weight gaining, it is inevitable, but I've also learned that by pushing through it all, you WILL see results in the end. I've learned that what works for one person may not work for another, and experimenting, is healthy.

I remember looking at other people's tickers on MFP and seeing 80 lbs lost, 90 lbs lost, 100lbs lost, and I just thought, "WOW, one day I will be able to say that too, just you wait!" And here I am, 103lbs lost, looking at my ticker in awe of how God has taught me so many things, and walked me through all of this, even when I gave up on myself so many times. I still have over 100lbs to go, I was almost 400lbs (if not that since I never wanted to step foot on a scale then), but I can honestly say, I am looking forward to seeing the rest melt away. That is the biggest thing I've learned thus far, if you don't learn to love you while you are still trying to lose weight, you will just have the same self-hatred when you reach your goal, just in a smaller body, and you know what, I LOVE ME! So here are my pictures. To my family, my friends, my MFP friends, thank you for the encouragement, love, and support. I don't have many, if any at my heaviest, because I just didn't take pictures, but i pray that every person attempting to lose weight, any amount, find exactly what they are looking for, because there is really no secret, the key however, is you. Anything worth while doesn't come overnight, but can start TOnight!

Two of my heaviest known pictures

This one is after I started dropping weight in a size 28

First comparison after losing about 80lbs

Recent comparison after losing about 90lbs