Lifting for an overweight teen?

It's ultimately going to come down to what she wants to do. Even if she doesn't buy her own food, it will still come down to her eating less, period.

As for the actual physiology, I think it would be the best idea to have the family consult a physician.

Kids this age need a good basis of gpp that'll allow them to turn their hand to more specific sports later on.

Having fun outdoors, playing games, after school activities like martial arts, etc.

A regimented training program for someone this age is for hand-picked youths who are being shepherded into elite programs (like gymnastics, for example).

Regular kids need to play and have fun and stay healthy.

I'll probably get heat for this...but "should you" invest in a child? If you think about those words, the answer is clear. Of course you should! You never know...you could be the stability she needs. Children need structure, and if it's not coming from her own parents, maybe YOU are it. Of course, she has to be willing. Mommy wanting it doesn't mean daughter wants it, too. You can ask and see how it goes. As far as "can" she lift... I am a member at a gym and bring both my 14 and 15 year old children with me. We met with trainers, and their weight lifting regimen is the same as mine, but with one rep set less on upper body exercises. We use the free weights, not the resistance machines. The trainer also recommended cardio for both of us, and assigned us the same time/resistance, so no differences in cardio, and our machine of choice is the Arc trainer. Both the middle and high schools in our city (less than 25,000 pop) have free weight gyms that they utilize in their everyday gym classes, so I don't think there should be a phobia about weight lifting for teens. There are those who feel teens should NOT be lifting weights, and those who are okay with it. I'll just say this...after 6 weeks at the gym my son has lost 22 lb. Now, we have drastically changed our eating, clean eating and no junk anymore, so it all goes hand in hand. But if you can get her active, she may just like the changes and stay active and start restricting her own diet. You will never know if you do not try.

The only thing you can support with her is how nutrition is very important

I've dealt with younger kids all my life through scouts, big brothers, etc. and they all have some manner of "two deep involvement" meaning you need to ensure you are not alone with her. Have her bring along a trusted adult.

I would try to find some larger motivation than just weight loss - e.g. completing 10k. Going to be rough, but you would need to find something that drives her. Draw from a favorite movie and bring in the element of fitness.

There is certainly something else driving this and linked to the divorce - depression and lack of self esteem go hand in hand and she needs to find her place and something to excel at.

This poor girl has a lot of problems evidenced in part by the fact that her Mother asked you to help her. Why won't the Mother step in and help her daughter. I hear shifting my responsibility onto someone else. I think everyone is right she is too young to be lifting. They probably both need counseling.

My son lifted weights in middle and high school. He holds the area record for bench pressing 505 pounds and has since 2003. However, during his mid twenties he had to have dead tissue removed from his chest resulting in part from lifting.

If perhaps you are the object of this young lady's adoration right now and her mother thinks you can be a positive influence perhaps you could help her find some enjoyable cardio work and weight lifting techniques with no more than 10 pound weights.

I think everybody is kind of missing the boat. First, the parents need to be educated or nothing else matters. The kid doesn't do the grocery shopping and ultimately the parents can dictate what her activities are. I was a child in the 80's and a teen in the early 90's and in the summer time my dad did not let me in the house to watch TV unless it was raining, "get outside with your friends." In-short, it starts in educating the parents because the parents will have the biggest influence. Once her parents are on-board then you can work with them and the child. If the parents aren't on-board and willing to support a lifestyle change, then you are definitely wasting your time. There's a good chance that the parents, or maybe one of them, needs the same lifestyle change.

Yes, strength training is just fine for children it just needs to be done intelligently.

CSARdiver wrote: »

I've dealt with younger kids all my life through scouts, big brothers, etc. and they all have some manner of "two deep involvement" meaning you need to ensure you are not alone with her. Have her bring along a trusted adult.

I would try to find some larger motivation than just weight loss - e.g. completing 10k. Going to be rough, but you would need to find something that drives her. Draw from a favorite movie and bring in the element of fitness.

There is certainly something else driving this and linked to the divorce - depression and lack of self esteem go hand in hand and she needs to find her place and something to excel at.

It's wonderful that you want to help, but this is a very valid point here. These days all adults need to protect themselves when having any kind of involvement with a child who is not their own, however well-intentioned they are.

sengalissa wrote: »

Actually, she is only 12.5, not even a teen. Her body is more like 14 or 15, and she is taller than me and obese. She is friends with my daughter and her mother begged me to show her exercises in our appartment gym. I work out there, by myself, and I am hesitant about it. Would love to help but don't want the liability. Then again, they are seeing a nutritionist (no change), the said girl hates and avoids cardio - so maybe lifting would give her a positive attitude about her body?
Can she lift at her age? What should I do?
The problem has many sides - her parents having gotten divorced over the last two years, looks starting to matter and her feeling bad about herself. Nutrition is a problem (daddy loves to take her out to eat, mom has 10000 dietary restrictions and daughter begs for fast food), exercise does not happen because she hates her body.

Should I even get invested? I could be the family friend who turns her life around. Or I could waste my energy in something where no one is really wanting any changes.

Stay out of it. This is not something where talking to her or even convincing her to get involved in sports will help, it will only make her feel worse. She needs to change her eating habits, and this cna only happen at home. Perhaps suggest to her mother to talk to a therapist (mother, NOT the child) as this could help on the long run.
If she wants to come along when your family does outdoors activities, sports etc, awesome. But only if she wants to. Do not keep suggesting to her to come for a run or a bike ride etc, because she will only feel worse if she is only invited at "lose weight" related activities, she probably feels already bad about her body.
And in general, even if she was willing, I would never ever show to a minor how to do exercises at a home gym. She could get hurt, learn things with wrong form, stress her muscles or joints in ways that are not right for her body and age.

I'll reiterate:

Kids need to go outside and play.

They do not need to train like powerlifters, bodybuilders, etc.

They need to have fun. Sounds like she's not going to be having a lot of fun at home. Playing outside with mates is probably the antidote to a lot that's effed up in her life at the moment.

I don't think you can make that happen for her though...