Confidence...a new thing for me

I have always been heavy my entire life. This has severely killed any shred of confidence that I may have had. I have never been one to have a good amount of self-esteem and have always been afraid to try things that I want to try because I am afraid that people will laugh at me or judge me. After losing 17 pounds over the last month I realize that I can do things that I want to do and I don't have to listen to what anybody else says. I know that it is not an extreme amount of weight but for me it is huge because I have tried for so long to lose even 5 pounds and it is never worked. I actually feel confident even though there isn't that big of a difference just yet.

Tonight I took myself out of my comfort zone and had confidence in myself. I sang the national anthem at an AHL (level of professional hockey below NHL) playoff game. It was scary, it was nerve racking, and it was extremely exciting. I felt proud when I stepped off of the ice after I sing because this is not something that I would ever do in front of so many people. I do karaoke every week but it is usually for a very small crowd not an entire arena full of people.

I think that being able to take control of my diet and finally drop some of the weight and drop some inches off of my body is going to be a huge step in gaining some self confidence for the first time in my life. Who knows, I may even try out for The Voice someday! Not something I am ready for at the moment though :-)