Let down

Between January 2014 and August 2014, I lost 40 pounds eating healthily, doing cardio, and lifting weights. At the risk of sounding cliche, I'll skip the part where I tell you I was "a completely changed person," albeit true. I honestly didn't fully realize the extent of my transformation until nearly 12 months later when I fell tragically off the wagon. I've gained 30 pounds back since my lowest weight. But what I notice most--more than the looseness of my skin, more than the bloating and uncomfortable feeling after meals, more than my digression in the gym--is the innocent dissapointment I see when my boyfriend looks at me, who misses seeing me happy, healthy, and proud of myself. He was and is my biggest supporter in my fitness journey, and he has seen the best and worst of me. The feeling of having let him down hit me long before the feeling of letting myself down, but now that I have felt both, I know that it is time to jump back on the wagon!

We registered with MyFitnessPal together, and he gave me a big ol' kiss when I was done signing up. I was ready to give it a shot initially, but after seeing the look in his eyes--when I saw how excited he was for me--I am ready to succeed and reach my goals!

Of course I know that I won't get anywhere unless these goals are my own, so the reason for my--let's call it a "do-over"--is to inspire rather than to disappoint. I know that I am a different person now than I was when I was fit and active and healthy. My goal is to be even better than that person that I was.