Very New and Very Overwhelmed

Hi all, my name is Angie..A friend told me about this site so I thought I would check it out and so far it seems amazing...I am trying to get back on track after a lifelong struggle of up and down weight loss...I have worked so hard in the past and lost weight but then I get to a point and let it all go and cannot understand why!! Food has been my comfort for so many things and I just enjoy good food and lots of it....I am trying to follow something like weight watchers on my own ( just started monday) but its so confusing to me that you can eat carbs or you shouldnt eat carbs, eat tons of friut or dont because of sugar...I really have no idea what is right and wrong...The low carb high protein always worked for me but its not a way of life for me....I love my carbs....I do not want to be skinny just healthy and would like to take off the 30+ pounds I have gained over the last year...I have no clothes that fit me and I refuse to buy a new wardrobe and I am going on 2 cruises this summer...You think that would motivate me more but it doesnt...I guess some is also depression but here I am and ready to try and make an effort to lost that weight.....Thanks for reading and look forward to hearing from some of you...

Angie

Replies

  • Suedre
    Suedre Posts: 435 Member
    I still don't completely know what's 'right' and what's 'wrong'. What I have learned is what works for me. It took a long time and a lot of experimenting to see how my body reacted to different intakes and exercise. The one thing that I did find to be completely true is that it takes a solid two weeks to really know if something is working or not. Start small, maybe count sodium, or sugar, or simply remove a 100 calories a day (can of soda, chocolate bar, nibbling while cooking). After you see if that change works or not, add a new one. Keep going until your find your happy place! :)
  • alleyag
    alleyag Posts: 142
    The best thing you can do for yourself is read. Google basic nutritional information for losing weight. You will find a ton of information and some that will be conflicting. Find a plan and stick to it. If things don't change or aren't moving fast enough change something, eat less, eat more, more cardiovascular more weights. Just learn the basics and go from there. Everyone's body is different. If I could leave you with two of the most important things to lose weight would be water lots of it. And a healthy breakfast . Make these two things a habit stick to sensible eating while counting calories and you should have no problems. Healthy dieting is about moderation not deprivation. Good luck with all your goals! Your more than welcome to add me if you like.
  • epj78
    epj78 Posts: 643 Member
    Deep breathes. You are going to be just fine!!

    Start small - don't think you have to do everything at once!!!! Here is what I would do if I were you:

    1) Start for a week or so of just logging your food. Just logging. Don't worry about calorie ranges, % fat, carb, protein - nothing. Just log. You'll most likely come in close to your calorie target just by paying attention to what you eat.

    2) Now start trying to hit your calorie target. That's it. Just log and try to come within 100 calories +/- your calorie target. Do this for a week or two.

    3) Add in some exercise. 30 minutes walking maybe 3-4 times a week. And try to get in 5 fruits/veggies a day.

    You get the idea. Just keep layering, but never overwhelming yourself with more than 1 or 2 new habits every few weeks. You are in this for a marathon not a sprint - so you don't need to come out full speed.

    I find there is no "right" answer for so many things - everyone is different. The only thing that I think are solid facts out there about losing weight is to eat your fruits and veggies, eat as clean as possible, exercise, drink water and put your body in a calorie deficit. Everything else is dependent on your body and it's needs, your personal goals, and what you can support within your lifestyle.
  • karenmi
    karenmi Posts: 242 Member
    Hi Angie - welcome to MFP! You've made an important first step by coming here, so kudos to you!

    I started MFP in Feb 2010 and have lost a little over 50 lbs, with now about 10 more to go. I'm not a fitness fanatic or a health nut, so I just started exercising almost every day and eating a balanced diet within my calorie range and I steadily lost 1-2 lbs a week. I didn't worry about carbs or no carbs, etc. but just ate a balanced diet with lots of fruits, veggies and very little processed food.

    Surround yourself with supportive people, celebrate your sucess (and not necessarily the number on the scale) and don't beat yourself up if you're not perfect. After all, if this is a lifestyle change that you're going to follow for the rest of your days then you can't be perfect all the time.

    If you want a MFP friend, send me a Friend Request and I'll help you any way I can. Good luck to you!!!
  • lovinglife71
    lovinglife71 Posts: 65 Member
    Hello and welcome,

    I couldn't have said it better myself! Every"body" is different and what may work for some"body" else may not work for you. It's basically trial and error. I recently hit a plateau myself and am going to try something different. This site is full of great tools and support and forums to provide you with everything you need to meet your weight loss goals. Feel free to add me we can support each other and Good luck!! =))
  • rlynge
    rlynge Posts: 6 Member
    Angie, first off welcome to MFP! My name is Ryan and though I am only 22 I have struggled with my weight all of my life. You will find that MFP has some amazing resources to get you on the right track. Being from the south, we (my family) are big on family and with that family comes the carbs and fats of southern food. I have only been on my mission for 8 days and I am already seeing results. All it takes is the will to change with some support from others who are doing the same. This is what is great about MFP. If you have the will to change then we have the support. From what I have seen so far there are plenty of supportive and friendly people here. I have found that creating accountability for your change motivates you as well as others. To do this I have set up a vlog on Youtube. You are more than welcome to check it out. I set it up so that I have more accountability and so that others in the world can see that they are not the only ones in this fight. Again, welcome to MFP!

    P.S. Here is the link to my vlog:
  • njdebbi
    njdebbi Posts: 10 Member
    Angie -- Welcome! First think about what works for YOU. Forget who says what about what. Different things work for different people, so first identify what works for you. Second -- deep breath, okay??

    Now, a couple things that work for me, that MAY help you.

    1. Write down everything you eat. The journal and database here are great. Everything. It doesn't matter if you are over or under calories as long as you write it ALL down.

    2. Try to stay close to your calorie goal, but an occassional over is okay. It helps keep the metabolism guessing. If the scale isn't moving try to do a few days under the goal too. But only a couple 100 calories is enough. DO NOT STARVE YOURSELF.

    3. I was the same way as you. Try diet, do good for a week or so, then mess up and give up and gain it back. Recently I did soem self help stuff to wrap my head around why I self sabotage. I read a book that has some enlightening stuff in called a Course in Weight Loss that helped me. But sit down and write out why you want to thin and why you think you might be holding onto being fat. Think about your comforts and fears and traumas and get it all down in front of you and then deal with it. Mine is a long ago trauma and the reality that this awful moment in my life has created 25 years of trauma and fatness infuriates me. I am over it and I don't want to be fat. If I need to feel safe and sound, I'll take up kickboxing when I get this weight off. Enough already.

    4. Stick to what you know. More veggies and fruit. Lean protein. Lay off refined carbs (bread and pasta). More whole grains and fiber. Watch the calorie content. And plan ahead so you don't derail. It is easy and you know that it is.

    5. Worry about today. What happened yesterday is over and done. Just move on and today is a do over. You get to start fresh and make the best of today, so do that. The goal everyday is to do your very best today and only today. Don't think about that wedding Saturday with all the food and how that will probably screw up the week and all the crap we feed ourselves mentally to give us excuses to fail. Failure isn't an option anymore. So forget about that. Today you get to succeed. When you wake up tomorrow the goal is the same. If you hit a bump. It's just that. I went out and had ice cream last night 220 calories. Counted it. Wrote it down. And you knwo what -- it's fine. I still was in my range for calories for the day. But if I didn't write it and I guessed I'd just keep eating thinking I blew it anyway. So, stay accountable to yourself. What if I did blow it cause of the ice cream. So?? Tomorrow we start fresh. And and up day keeps the metabolism guessing. So once in a while a higher calorie day is fine. No big deal.

    That's my advice. Hope it helps and Good luck. You can do this.
  • spr_chkn
    spr_chkn Posts: 48
    Hi there! I have my own issues as well. I eat because...well I like food. I can't say sadness or boredom = triggering to eat. Maybe just was not fully aware of how my food choices were "adding up" throughout the day. MFP is helping me with that though :)
    There is TONS of advice on the boards, some sound, some clearly not. You'll just have to sift through and figure what works best for you. I've lots to learn yet, I am sure.
    Anyhow, I've got about 30 more lbs to go as well so you can add me if you like! We can make the journey together :smile:
  • Nuts4play
    Nuts4play Posts: 92 Member
    I also find it frustrating with the many "diets" advertised. I guess If they all just taught us to eat HEALTHY, then they'd all sound the same and no one would be fat or confused. Sometimes I wonder if drug manufacturers and health clubs and junk food manufacturers aren't all in cahoots together! ;) But seriously, the best way I've heard is this... "if it doesn't grow from the ground, and doesn't have a mother... don't eat it!" ...and... stay to the outside of the isle's when grocery shopping. Fresh fruit and veggies, lean meats, whole grain breads, milk, eggs, cheese. Everything in moderation. You can have ice cream, but have a 1/2-1 cup, not a quart! You can have a cookie, but have 3, not 9. Basically, get rid of the soda's and junk food and you'll lose a ton of weight in no time at all! I just heard the other day of a girl who quit drinking soda and lost 30 lbs in one month! It's the little changes which make a huge difference! You can do it :)
  • aclark6818
    aclark6818 Posts: 209 Member
    I know exactly how you feel--I did well with WW, but it was not realistic for me to maintain. I have trouble merging the different theories about weight loss also. I had success here--I'm following the MFP guidelines--smaller portions, some better choices--more fruits & veggies, more balanced diet--but I'll tell you that if I need a Big Mac--I'll eat it (or half of it) & then compensate later--better choices for the next meal, add in extra exercise. I've found that when I deprive myself I often binge or eat around it and then eat it anyway. Make small changes and take small steps. You can do this. Beleive me if I can do this, you can!!! :smile:
  • l3ugjuice
    l3ugjuice Posts: 233
    Deep breathes. You are going to be just fine!!

    Start small - don't think you have to do everything at once!!!! Here is what I would do if I were you:

    1) Start for a week or so of just logging your food. Just logging. Don't worry about calorie ranges, % fat, carb, protein - nothing. Just log. You'll most likely come in close to your calorie target just by paying attention to what you eat.

    2) Now start trying to hit your calorie target. That's it. Just log and try to come within 100 calories +/- your calorie target. Do this for a week or two.

    3) Add in some exercise. 30 minutes walking maybe 3-4 times a week. And try to get in 5 fruits/veggies a day.

    You get the idea. Just keep layering, but never overwhelming yourself with more than 1 or 2 new habits every few weeks. You are in this for a marathon not a sprint - so you don't need to come out full speed.

    I find there is no "right" answer for so many things - everyone is different. The only thing that I think are solid facts out there about losing weight is to eat your fruits and veggies, eat as clean as possible, exercise, drink water and put your body in a calorie deficit. Everything else is dependent on your body and it's needs, your personal goals, and what you can support within your lifestyle.

    What she said x 10000. Awesome advice.

    It gets so much easier, you just have to keep at it.

    As far as the eat carbs, eat protein, eat fat...dont eat carbs, dont eat protein, dont eat fat...well, this is probably going to derail your thread, but I'm trying not to. My diet choice is just calorie counting pretty much. The strengths and weaknesses of the other 'fad' diets (dont start guys...), or 'limited food group diets' are not something I can help you with. So if you have questions about those, go buy some fat free popcorn and read threads with titles like 'Considering Atkins' and you can read all about the plusses and minuses from the more militant members of those particular diet groups, plus the more militant calorie counters. Me, I learned to stay away from those threads like the bubonic plague after one mistaken attempt =D. You sound like me though, because you said you love your carbs. I do too! I'd be more successful trying to become a vegan than I would trying to restrict carbs.

    Anyway, if you want to do calorie counting, my advice would be to focus mostly on the daily calorie deficit goal as a rule, and the nutritional guidelines as...well, guidelines. It really does get so much easier, particularly using this site (which I dont use anymore only because it wont sync with bodymedia's software, which is a pity as this site is so much better...but I obsess over numbers and bodymedia's reports are much better).

    Let yourself get used to the process of keeping track of your food. It'll seem a bit overwhelming at first, it was like that for me too. Just eat and log everything for a week. Then try to keep the calories down. As you do this, you will get a better mental grasp of what you can eat without looking it up....and then you can focus even more on where those calories come from to keep a good ratio of fat/carbs/protein (in comparison to your dietary needs, you may want to have a consultation with your doc to determine this).

    It really gets easier, and it works. Just dedicate yourself to it, and focus on motivating yourself to stick with it religiously for the first few weeks until it becomes second nature. I say focus on motivating YOURSELF because you simply cant rely on others for motivation. You can lean on others for support, which is great and helpful, but you have to learn to motivate yourself or you will fail.
  • You did a really great thing joining this site!

    My whole life has been a constant struggle with my weight - and it is nice to know I am not alone. I strongly suggest making friends on here, they will help keep you accountable and can offer great advice!

    What works for me may not work for you, but lowering carbs (not cutting them out completely) and exercising is always a great way to start. My friend has lost 30 pounds by eating a strict diet 5 days a week, then taking 2 days off to eat whatever he wants - and he exercises 5 days a week as well. That may be an option for you too?

    Good luck!