Why can't I just stop eating when I'm full?

It doesn't matter how delicious and satisfying that lunch or dinner was, I ALWAYS feel the urge to eat "dessert" within 5-45 minutes of eating. Even if I should be full, I feel like I just need to have dessert! It adds ~200-300 additional calories to my meal.

Unfortunately, in my family I have grown up this way, I've watched my parents eat this way. I'm in university and am still living at my parents, so it's not like I can just decide what we keep in the house. I've been a little overweight since my childhood, and although I'm just on the edge of the "healthy for weight/height range", I haven't reached my fitness goals.

I don't know how some people can do dessert one day a week!
I also can eat like 700-800 calories in one meal and not feel sick, and still eat 3 or 4 hours later. Why can't I just eat normal portions?

Does anyone else have the experience of finding it hard to eliminate sweets or have tips??
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Replies

  • IsaackGMOON
    IsaackGMOON Posts: 3,358 Member
    It doesn't matter how delicious and satisfying that lunch or dinner was, I ALWAYS feel the urge to eat "dessert" within 5-45 minutes of eating. Even if I should be full, I feel like I just need to have dessert! It adds ~200-300 additional calories to my meal.

    Does anyone else have the experience of finding it hard to eliminate sweets or have tips??

    It's probably a psychological thing due to neurotransmitters due to the taste of the food.

    By all means, have your dessert if it fits your macros and calorie goals.

    But you have to learn moderation.
  • sunnydays851
    sunnydays851 Posts: 116 Member
    I never eat dessert so I can't really relate...
    But it seems like you just need to get out of the mindset of 'I must eat dessert because reasons.' Get into the habit of doing something else after dinner... to replace the old habit.
  • kcd1961
    kcd1961 Posts: 126 Member
    Same here, so I don't eliminate it. I eat less in the day, accept hunger and allow myself extra at night which has always been the problem time. Some lower calorie options might help too - like a piece of fruit you enjoy, some berries and a low calorie ice cream. PS If you are on the edge of the healthy weight range, what is the problem? Are you sure your goals are realistic? As you get close to your target, progress can slow down considerably.
  • KathleenOsborne
    KathleenOsborne Posts: 6 Member
    edited June 2015
    Thanks for your responses! This is my first post! :)
    I generally eat whole foods and am good at avoiding junk foods like soda, candy, chips, cake, etc. but I can eat a bowl of berries after a big, high-protein, high-fat, high-calorie meal, and then grab "healthy" high-sugar cookies which is what I was really craving; totaling consuming over 1000 calories in an hour which I know is not a good thing. Usually I eat most of my calories in the evening. I've tried chewing gum and brushing my teeth after eating what should be a very substantial, filling meal, but will often end up eating something else when I'm full. If I fasted, would that decrease my hunger levels? Or if I fasted from sugar but maintained carbs, calories and proteins?

    I'm usually pretty sedentary as a result of trying to keep up with life, so I find I have to watch my caloric (and fat, carb, sugar, etc.) intake to avoid gaining weight.
    Now, I am borderlining being overweight. For me it's not about the "number on the scale", but being leaner and having better endurance (I'm a pathetic runner/hiker, but I strive to pick up running and hiking more).
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  • North44
    North44 Posts: 359 Member
    edited June 2015
    I always want something sweet after lunch and dinner. I just eat something that doesn't add a bunch of calories. 100 would be my upper limit on a dessert normally and it's usually far less. Tonight I had a turtle candy. It was 78 calories.
  • bioklutz
    bioklutz Posts: 1,365 Member
    Thanks for your responses! This is my first post! :)
    I generally eat whole foods and am good at avoiding junk foods like soda, candy, chips, cake, etc. but I can eat a bowl of berries after a big, high-protein, high-fat, high-calorie meal, and then grab "healthy" high-sugar cookies which is what I was really craving; totaling consuming over 1000 calories in an hour which I know is not a good thing. Usually I eat most of my calories in the evening. I've tried chewing gum and brushing my teeth after eating what should be a very substantial, filling meal, but will often end up eating something else when I'm full. If I fasted, would that decrease my hunger levels? Or if I fasted from sugar but maintained carbs, calories and proteins?

    I'm usually pretty sedentary as a result of trying to keep up with life, so I find I have to watch my caloric (and fat, carb, sugar, etc.) intake to avoid gaining weight.
    Now, I am borderlining being overweight. For me it's not about the "number on the scale", but being leaner and having better endurance (I'm a pathetic runner/hiker, but I strive to pick up running and hiking more).

    I intentionally eat light during the day so that I can have a HUGE dinner and snack. About 65% of my calories are eaten after 6:00 pm. I lost weight doing this and am maintaining my weight doing this.

    The reason I lost weight was because I was eating a calorie deficit. If you want to lose weight that is all it takes. It doesn't matter if you eat all your calories at once, space it out between 2 meals, 3 meals, 6 meals. Have a cookie, don't have a cookie. Do what works for you.
  • littlemissbeana
    littlemissbeana Posts: 1 Member
    I have this same problem! I feel like I am not losing a thing because of dessert! I have no self control, at all, when it comes to sweets.
  • MKEgal
    MKEgal Posts: 3,250 Member
    Develop willpower by doing little steps.
    Tell yourself, "today I will not have dessert". Or maybe even start with, "today I will have half the dessert I want".
    Pretty soon, tell yourself, "this week, I will only have 3 desserts".
    Then it's only 1 a week. Make it a treat, as it should be, and you'll appreciate it more.

    Alternatively, plan those calories into your allowance. Substitute something healthy. Exercise more.
    Think about how many hours on the treadmill it 'costs' to eat whatever you're tempted by.

    Also, about eating a large meal, then eating more a couple hours later...
    Try substituting something healthy.
    Try telling yourself that you will wait 10 minutes, and if you still want to eat, you'll have a _small_ snack.
    Meanwhile, do something away from food & something which will occupy your hands.
    Try brushing your teeth when the urge to binge hits. Or go for a walk. Knit. Call a friend. Do something that's
    incompatible with eating.
    Have something with a strong taste. I have a bag of peppermints within reach. Or grow some mint.
  • razzjam334
    razzjam334 Posts: 39 Member
    I believe it means food is an addiction for you and your family also for mine I grow up the same way and I believe this to be the reason I'm over weight
  • razzjam334
    razzjam334 Posts: 39 Member
    I have to treat food a an addition and continuously fight an up hill battle to have control it gets easier the more you say no and stick to it
  • SherryTeach
    SherryTeach Posts: 2,836 Member
    100 calorie fudge bars or a frozen fruit bar or a 100 calorie pack of cookie thins with a cup of tea. I often do that in the evening for a little treat. But as far a feeling that you cannot stop eating, that is either psychological or you aren't at the point yet where caring for your health is really that important.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    edited June 2015
    you just don't do it...it's habit...habits can be broken...you just don't do it...unfortunately there is nothing magical that you can do...you just don't do it.
  • Kida_Adeylne
    Kida_Adeylne Posts: 201 Member
    I'm a cake/cookie fiend and have a lot of trouble resisting. It's probably mostly habit: your body/brain 'knows' when it's sugar cookies time.
    things you can try:
    -Try eating a smaller portion of both supper and dessert.
    -Go for a walk when it's 'dessert time'. Or any exercise can really help. (though intense isn't the best right after a meal)
    -Have small, very good quality treats that you get 1 or 2 of a day (I did this with very expensive chocolates. Savour them and don't feel guilty. High quality usually trumps quantity when it comes to my cravings, at least).
    -Every time your body insists it 'needs' sweets, have a cup of tea. (I also did this, since I often had emotional eating attacks and tea helped the emotions)
  • allyouwannado
    allyouwannado Posts: 32 Member
    What do they say, it takes 21 days to break a bad habit? 30? 60? I find that with food I can break a habit with a couple days of very mindful eating. It's hard for sure! But so worth it. Then when you do spring for dessert go for something like fruit, yogurts, maybe a bit of granola etc. I'm snacking on apple slices right now (and fighting the urge for captain crunch)!

    I find this thought helps me with cravings: I've never ever ever woken up and said man, I wish I really pigged out last night. But I HAVE woken up and said I'm so glad that I resisted the temptation! That HOORAY moment in the morning becomes addicting on its own! Good luck :)
  • FitForL1fe
    FitForL1fe Posts: 1,872 Member
    edited June 2015
    chug 20 oz of water before the meal

    and after the meal

    and drink that much while you eat too

    hydrate the *kitten* out of yourself. it will curb hunger
  • Christine_72
    Christine_72 Posts: 16,049 Member
    I have the same exact problem! The minute i finish dinner, no matter how stuffed I am, I instantly feel like something sweet.
    It's not a childhood thing, as we very rarely had dessert when I was a kid.

    I was thinking about substituting chocolate, ice cream etc etc with one of those low cal hot chocolate drinks. Hopefully that'll be enough to satisfy the sweet tooth.

    They're not in season here at the moment, but a bowl of berries and pineapple is also a good alternative to calorie dense sweets.
  • Caitoriri
    Caitoriri Posts: 87 Member
    I go for a walk if I'm still feeling "mentally hungry" after dinner. In fact, I have to make sure I don't exercise BEFORE dinner, because if I do, I'm just not hungry for anything afterwards.
  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
    It doesn't matter how delicious and satisfying that lunch or dinner was, I ALWAYS feel the urge to eat "dessert" within 5-45 minutes of eating. Even if I should be full, I feel like I just need to have dessert! It adds ~200-300 additional calories to my meal.

    Unfortunately, in my family I have grown up this way, I've watched my parents eat this way. I'm in university and am still living at my parents, so it's not like I can just decide what we keep in the house. I've been a little overweight since my childhood, and although I'm just on the edge of the "healthy for weight/height range", I haven't reached my fitness goals.

    I don't know how some people can do dessert one day a week!
    I also can eat like 700-800 calories in one meal and not feel sick, and still eat 3 or 4 hours later. Why can't I just eat normal portions?

    Does anyone else have the experience of finding it hard to eliminate sweets or have tips??

    Maybe try 16:8 Intermittent Fasting. Do not eat for 16 hours out of the 24 and eat during an eight hour window that includes a big dinner and desert.

  • Becca_250
    Becca_250 Posts: 188 Member
    I have the exact same problem, I get a very strong desire to want something sweet after a main meal! The only times I don't do this is when I've had a particularly big meal or if I drink a large mug of tea straight after my main meal - the liquid makes my stomach feel as full as if I had had a dessert.
    A lot of the time I just try to fit the sweet stuff into my calorie goals and choose fairly low calorie options. I've swapped full size chocolate bars for small bags of popcorn, frozen yoghurt, fruit or a couple of pieces of dark chocolate. Today someone brought cookies into work and I halved one with my colleague. Not sure if this will work for you, but for me it's quite often just the taste of something sweet rather than needing to have loads of it!
  • bubaluboo
    bubaluboo Posts: 2,098 Member
    I always eat desert. Whether that's a small piece of chocolate or some fruit with yoghurt and a little honey or something sweet. It can fit in your calorie limit if you are careful with how much and what you choose.
  • SideSteel
    SideSteel Posts: 11,068 Member
    Would you be willing to set your diary to public/open? I'm curious about a few things and it would be much easier to just look at your food diary.
  • mbaker566
    mbaker566 Posts: 11,233 Member
    first, don't say can't. you can.
    second, try saving calories for it or eating some berries at the end of dinner
    third, try going for a walk. you are then changing one habit for another
  • likehlikeo
    likehlikeo Posts: 185 Member
    I usually do the dishes and clean the kitchen RIGHT after dinner, so my brain knows, that "food time" is over for sure. It sounds silly, but it kind of works :)
  • KathleenOsborne
    KathleenOsborne Posts: 6 Member
    Wow, thanks for your thoughtful responses everyone! I read each one of your comments thoroughly and found some very good tips to consider.

    I think one of the other issues is that I eat by "habit" rather than eating when I'm actually hungry. Next week when things slow down I'll try going for walks after dinner. Exercising usually curbs my appetite; if I run before dinner I'm not that hungry. I'm really going to work on the portion control for sweet treats ;)

    I know it's no excuse but I feel like I don't always have "time" to exercise, so I really have to moderate my caloric intake most days. I just finished a grueling second year in uni and went through work out sprees and plateaus when I was really stressed. I finish for the summer next week though, so I should be better able to be consistent with workouts.
  • KathleenOsborne
    KathleenOsborne Posts: 6 Member
    SideSteel wrote: »
    Would you be willing to set your diary to public/open? I'm curious about a few things and it would be much easier to just look at your food diary.
    Not sure how to do that lol
  • havingitall
    havingitall Posts: 3,728 Member
    I grew up in a dessert family too. We keep a bag or Werthers in the cupboard and I take one after a meal for that sweet taste
  • laddyboy
    laddyboy Posts: 1,565 Member
    Here is what works for me and many others...Brush your teeth after dinner and again if you get that urge to eat. Something about brushing your teeth cuts out the wanting to eat again. You're doing great. Keep up the good work.
  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
    It's a conditioned response I suspect - your brain over riding your natural hunger cues and expecting a reward from hyper-palatable food given your previous behaviour.

    Every noticed how many adults just have to have a snack around 3-4pm? Is it because our bodies are all the same irrespective of what we have eaten through out the day or because lots of us got back from school when we were younger at around that time and were given a snack or a treat?

    The way to over come this is to consciously practice a different behaviour after meals (preferably a positive or pleasurable thing - like having sometime to yourself to read, catch up on emails with friends, beauty treatment) to create a different association. The more you do it the easier it will become.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,782 Member
    razzjam334 wrote: »
    I believe it means food is an addiction for you and your family also for mine I grow up the same way and I believe this to be the reason I'm over weight

    No, it's probably more of a Pavlovian response. Over years of repeated behavior, you have "trained" your body/brain to expect a dessert shortly after dinner. You have to "untrain" yourself by establishing a new behavior. Train yourself to walk around the block after dinner. Replace your dessert habit with a healthier habit.