Questions for those further in their journey...

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faithan84
faithan84 Posts: 717 Member
I'm 6 months in, and while I'm still going strong, I'm worried that I'll self sabotage. I weigh less now than I've ever weighed as an adult, and my brain hasn't caught up yet. I don't see 83 pounds of weight loss when I look in the mirror, and trying on my old jeans is like a magic trick... Who switched out my clothes for larger sizes? I didn't believe I could make it this far, and I almost don't believe I can make it farther.

Weight loss has definitely slowed down. I was losing 10+ pounds/month, and now I'm around 4-6 pounds/month. I don't think I'm at a plateau, but sometimes it feels like it. I've got 37 pounds to go to hit my goal weight.

So questions:

- I spend a LOT of time thinking about food, logging food, cooking food, buying food, planning food... I guess I was hoping that with weight loss success came less worry with food. Is there a point where this becomes less time consuming or is this going to be part of my new lifestyle permanently?

- I have incorporated some exercise along the way, but I've not been really dedicated with it. I know the health benefits of cardio and strength training, but I've been a bit lazy since the weight is coming off without intense exercise. Also, I have limited time to devote to it. I'm single without children and I work 56+ hours/week. Along with food prep, I can't imagine how people with significant others and children fit everything in!!! I guess my question is - is the time and effort you put into exercise worth it to you, and how did you get past the excuses for not doing it?

- I'm worried that when I reach a healthy weight I won't like what I see. I already have excess skin around my middle, and I stare at pictures of me that just don't look like me at all. I like that I'm smaller, but I'm starting to not recognize myself. Have you experienced these things? Did you have to learn to like what "healthy you" looks like?

Replies

  • bioklutz
    bioklutz Posts: 1,365 Member
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    It sounds like now is the perfect time to take a little bit of a weight loss break. If you are losing 4-6 pounds a month you have a deficit of 500-750 calories a day. I would pick a time frame and eat your maintenance calories. Somewhere between 2-6 weeks. Then get back to it. A tiny break might help your mind catch up to your weight loss. Here is an interesting article about weight loss breaks: http://www.bodyrecomposition.com/fat-loss/the-full-diet-break.html/

    Exercise should be for health. This is what the American Heart Association recommends: http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/GettingHealthy/PhysicalActivity/FitnessBasics/American-Heart-Association-Recommendations-for-Physical-Activity-in-Adults_UCM_307976_Article.jsp You can break it up into manageable time frames. To get the health benefits you do not have to spend an hour every day working out.
  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
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    4~6 pounds a month is good ! Dont get down on yourself, remember the saying SLOW AND STEADY WINS THE RACE !
    To answer your first question about food, no that never really changed for me. I'm still constantly planning my foods, thinking about which foods I'd like that week and so on. I think about food more then i think about anything else. Lol
    And as far as exercise, it just became part of my day. At first it was rough because i felt like i didnt have time but then realized that if i really want something then I'll make time for it. Even if i have to wake up earlier or go to bed later, i find a way to get it done. Most of the time...i believe that its worth it for sure. I worked 55hrs this week , have a husband and kid and dogs to clean ,cook and care for but i made time because it was definitely worth it for me. Once i started to see the results of my workouts , i knew that i wanted to continue.
    When i read your comment about looking in the mirror and not recognizing yourself, i remember that feeling for sure. It's almost like my brain hadnt caught up to the new me in the mirror yet. In time, i got used to it and it was no longer a shock to see myself thin.
    These are all just my opinions and thoughts so things might play out differently for you though. Im not an expert and thats just my experiences with this process so far. Best of luck to you !!
  • jessieleah
    jessieleah Posts: 204 Member
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    I think about food all the time. Planning, logging, when I'm going to eat, what I'm going to eat, when I get to eat next... am I going to go over my calories? Do I have enough calories left for x y or z? Then feeling guilty if I go over calories or eat something I didn't plan to eat. To be honest, it's pretty tiresome sometimes. I've been at this for almost 2 years now and honestly it's worse now than it ever was before. I recently switched to having meals at set times of the day 10:30, 2:30, 6 and 8 pm and that has sort of helped, I guess. I can sort of stop thinking about it during the day until that times comes.

    I'm ~3 lbs from my original goal weight (of 130 lbs), but I switched my goal to 120 recently because I still have a lot more fat than I want. When I hit 120, if there's still fat to get rid of I'm going to switch to maintenance and build more muscle. I'm still not 100% happy with how I look, but I have a lot more confidence. My stomach is my biggest issue. Links if you want to see: http://i.imgur.com/aGiPAs1.jpg http://i.imgur.com/jI2I540.jpg It's still flabby and loose and frustrating!

    On the more positive side... I really enjoy fitness now. This is coming from someone who, a year ago, never pictured herself ever liking exercise or doing it regularly. Now I work out 5-6 days a week. I'm sure I could lose weight without it, but honestly the feeling of progressing at fitness, getting stronger, faster and more endurance is exhilarating! I can do push-ups and pull-ups now, I've run a 5k... it's awesome! The way I committed to it is by having my boyfriend hold me accountable for doing it. After about 2-3 months I was able to hold myself accountable.

    Back to the "not liking what you see" thing... I doubt I'm going to be 100% happy with how I look even when I hit 120 lbs. I started out at 230+ lbs, so honestly it's a miracle what my body has managed to salvage for me. However, I'm not too concerned with that because I know I can continue working out and working on my body without losing more weight and eventually get to a place where I'm happy. That's part of the reason I think exercise is so great. It's not just about appearance, but that's certainly part of it! I'm just impatient lol.
  • vanessalillian82
    vanessalillian82 Posts: 350 Member
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    1) I think that eventually, healthy eating becomes second nature, especially when you realise that you actually feel better for eating properly. Assusming you're mostly eating "real" foods to begin with (i.e. less processed stuff, and more vegetables, fruit and lean meat - I had a quick peek at your diary and you seem to be mostly on the right track), overeating becomes more difficult. I'm not at goal yet, but have previously been successful in losing and maintaining, and maintenance worked out okay because I kept cooking the right kinds of food and had become aware of portion sizes. I'm losing again now and I log most of the time, but when I'm not logging I just make sure to fill up on the good stuff - it's almost impossible to overeat on broccoli, for example - and make sure I'm being honest with myself about true portion sizes of grains, dairy, nuts, oils and meat.

    2) I'm terrible at this myself, but recently signed up for a 5km run and have just booked in a personal trainer to help motivate me. I've been exercising semi-regularly since March, and yesterday I noticed an improvement in my fitness when I went hiking - it was definitely more enjoyable. So yes, definitely worth it and no, I don't think it necessarily needs to be intense (although if you're short on time that will help get it out of the way). My trainer swears he can have me in and out of the gym in 45 minutes and have done an effective workout, so if he's right then I'll be pretty excited about that! I'm also lucky enough to have a partner who is supportive and loves hiking as much as I do, so me exercising isn't necessarily taking away from time spent with him, at least not on weekends.

    3) I can't really answer this one, although exercise will help tone your muscles and improve how you look as you lose weight. There are heaps of threads from people who have lost a tonne of weight, ended up with loose skin and then improved how it looked by lifting weights. They call losing weight and muscle "skinny-fat". Also, not to be underestimated is how exercise will make you feel in yourself, in terms of pride in your accomplishments as your fitness improves, regardless of what you see in the mirror. So this time around I'm personally aiming to exercise more and not be "skinny-fat" like I was last time I hit my goal weight.

    Not sure if any of that helped, but good luck, and congratulations on your loss so far, and just remember that it is all about leading a healthier lifestyle in general, which takes time. :smile:
  • blankiefinder
    blankiefinder Posts: 3,599 Member
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    I think losing 4-6 lbs a month right now is perfect for your current weight, and I wouldn't mess with what's working. It can be very hard to get back into a deficit once you switch to maintenance.

    As to thinking about food a lot, I think that is normal. I've been in maintenance for 3 months now, but still have to watch what I eat. After all, I know from experience that if I allow myself to just eat what I want, when I want, I will gain.

    I think that you don't necessarily need a lot of cardio for general health, but that strength training is good, as it will help retain muscle mass, helps prevent osteoporosis, and helps you look good naked. :p

    Just remember that you need to give your body time to recover. I've decided to give myself a few years for my skin to shrink before I get discouraged.
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
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    1. I used to obsessively think about food. I kind of got over it when I started pre-logging my food in the morning. I sit down at breakfast and think about what I have in the fridge for meals, what's in the cabinet, etc and then log the things I want and move things around so that they fit into my calorie goal. Now everything is planned out for the day and I just follow it. I also think about food less when I'm more flexible with my foods. I've found when I begin restricting foods that I become obsessive about those foods.

    2. I haven't been exercising consistently or much lately, as I have a new baby. I'm running on exhausted fumes of energy lately. But I do feel better when I do exercise. It's probably the endorphins, lol. It also makes me feel less stressed out. I think the key to sustaining exercise is finding things that truly hold your interest and that you really love doing. When that happens, you find time.

    3. Not sure I really have a problem recognizing myself. Sometimes I do have to do a double-take. And when I go clothes shopping I naturally gravitate to the larger sizes. I often find myself having to try on smaller sizes that I'm just not used to. I do have a loose stomach (just had a baby, so I don't know how much is permanent), but even with it, I feel so much better about myself. And I feel like I look really good, all things considered.
  • ManiacalLaugh
    ManiacalLaugh Posts: 1,048 Member
    edited June 2015
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    1. Before I lost the weight, I was obsessed with food anyway; my mind was always on the topic of my next meal/snack and how awesome it would be. Now, counting has just given me a way to channel that mental energy into habits that will help, not hinder.

    That being said, I've had a lot of success counting (85 lbs so far, 20 to go), but I haven't always tracked. After a while, I just became familiar with how to make better choices, and what size a proper serving should be; "guesstimations" were okay for me and my goals (I wasn't in a huge hurry to lose- and I'd always try to overestimate). The trick with this though, is to look at the scale. I'm back on MFP because my weight loss stalled and the scale even creeped up a bit. I do feel as though I can go back to trusting my own judgement without tracking at some point, but I might need to revisit tracking once and a while to make sure my perspective on how much I'm eating is accurate.

    2. The dietician/trainer my health insurance company provided for me completely changed my perspective on exercise and weightloss. She said, "I can give you 100 reasons why you should work out, but losing weight isn't one of them." Exercise can give us more wiggle room in our diets, help prevent bone density issues in later life, and is thought to aid in protecting us against cancer, but it isn't essential for weight loss. Knowing this, exercise has become less of a mandated chore for me. If I miss a day on the treadmill, I don't stress about it. It's become a fun thing to do again.

    She also tuned me in to some great, fast workouts, including cardio/strength circuits that take about 10 minutes each round, and some of the 7-minute workouts online. These are great for fitting into a busy schedule because if you have time, you can simply repeat the circuit for several rounds, but if you're busy and can only do one - hey, you've done something today for physical activity.

    3. I do have a problem with my self-image, in that I still imagine myself as that extremely overweight version, sometimes. Last time I went to a department store, I wandered in the plus size department for about 15 minutes before I realized none of those clothes fit me anymore - and they haven't for a long time. I also am still extremely shy around my boyfriend - who I've been living with for almost a year. I have a bit of loose skin on my belly, which still hangs over due to the way it stretched and the amount of time it spent that way; for this reason, I might never be confident to wear a bikini, no matter how small I get.

    That self-image is sticking in my brain, no matter how much weight I've lost. This is when counseling and support groups such as MFP come in handy. I recognize this is an area that I need to improve on. Now that I've been working on the body for a while, I need to work on the mind.



    Ugh - sorry for the wall-o-text. I hope I was able to answer your questions.
  • mistikal13
    mistikal13 Posts: 1,457 Member
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    The way that you're thinking about food all the time sounds exhausting! A nutritionist should be able to help you develop a better relationship with food. Good luck
  • jocey517
    jocey517 Posts: 30 Member
    edited June 2015
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    1) Yes I would think constantly about food - planning out my meals for the day - when the next time I could eat - was I staying within my portion limits - how did I do yesterday.... constantly. I'd say in the last month or so it has finally slowed down for the first time in my life and I attribute this to I've now changed how I interact with food. I used to look at it as a "treat" or I had a bad day so let's get take out or my husband just yelled at me - chocolate will make me feel better. I really tried to pay attention to these and realize that I was not treating myself or making myself feel better but hurting myself. I started to view food as a way to fuel my body - and my workouts. This was not overnight and again this was gradual. Do I still log - yes during the week. But now I have such a meal routine that I know my portions and what I eat to stay within my daily limits. I also know if I have something that I don't normally eat - my body somewhat rejects it and it just isn't worth 10 seconds in my mouth to feel sick to my stomach for hours. I used to worry that I was going to be the obsessive person over food for the rest of my life - but you are prepping yourself and educating yourself and training your body to make changes for life!

    2) I have a 2 year old daughter, husband and work full time. Is my schedule hectic - yes - are there other people who have even more on their plate - absolutely. In the beginning I could make every excuse (usually not really excuses bc most of the time I genuinely was sleep deprived) to not workout but I committed to making this something I take time to do for myself as well as wanting to set a good example for my daughter. If I'm exhausted I still go to work, I still clean the house, I still am a Mom & a wife - so I should take the time to do something for myself. In the beginning you don't want to do it but it is so beneficial beyond the physical aspect and now I need it for my head - it keeps me happier, helps me deal with daily stress and anxiety so much better. If you’re taking the care to eat right for your body you may as well take the care to do right by your body with exercise too.

    3) Exercising - especially lifting weights - will help you build muscles and tone so you will feel better in your skin. I will never have a body of a model but I am so much more comfortable in my body knowing that I'm doing right by it and taking care of it.

    Take pride in what you have accomplished already:)
  • sistrsprkl
    sistrsprkl Posts: 1,013 Member
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    I've lost 50lbs 3 times now (twice after kids) and have kept it off for over 10 years.
    1) Eat what you like, make it somewhat balanced so you get proper nutrition (produce, fiber, protein) and log it all. I don't give it much thought or planning at all. Educate yourself about nutrition but eat what you like!
    2) Find exercises you love! And try to break a sweat once a day. I'm always mixing up my routines. I've just started lifting, which I do love and wish I'd started sooner. I also love yoga and running. Just do something and have fun.
    3) My last baby was 10lbs and I still have some loose skin on my belly and will always have stretch marks there. Weightlifting is slowly helping my tummy to flatten and I'm trying to be more comfortable in my own skin. I wore a string bikini at pool today! Who cares!
  • mimigingerbread
    mimigingerbread Posts: 43 Member
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    I have found that I obsessed about good every time I have dieted. This time (the most successful) I have just cut out evening snacks, chosen healthy food and watched my portion control. The weight is coming off and I feel so much freer.
    For exercise I have been using fitnessblender.com They have tons of free workouts to do at home at all different lengths and all different fitness levels. Very good for mental health. I do 30 min a day 5 times a week. But you can start shorter than that.
    My stomach doesn't look great but I look way better in clothes and skin is supposed to improve for 2 years... So I hope that's true!!
  • mimigingerbread
    mimigingerbread Posts: 43 Member
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    Oops obsesses about food not good
  • Qskim
    Qskim Posts: 1,145 Member
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    faithan84 wrote: »
    I'm 6 months in, and while I'm still going strong, I'm worried that I'll self sabotage. I weigh less now than I've ever weighed as an adult, and my brain hasn't caught up yet. I don't see 83 pounds of weight loss when I look in the mirror, and trying on my old jeans is like a magic trick... Who switched out my clothes for larger sizes? I didn't believe I could make it this far, and I almost don't believe I can make it farther.

    Weight loss has definitely slowed down. I was losing 10+ pounds/month, and now I'm around 4-6 pounds/month. I don't think I'm at a plateau, but sometimes it feels like it. I've got 37 pounds to go to hit my goal weight.

    So questions:

    - I spend a LOT of time thinking about food, logging food, cooking food, buying food, planning food... I guess I was hoping that with weight loss success came less worry with food. Is there a point where this becomes less time consuming or is this going to be part of my new lifestyle permanently?

    - I have incorporated some exercise along the way, but I've not been really dedicated with it. I know the health benefits of cardio and strength training, but I've been a bit lazy since the weight is coming off without intense exercise. Also, I have limited time to devote to it. I'm single without children and I work 56+ hours/week. Along with food prep, I can't imagine how people with significant others and children fit everything in!!! I guess my question is - is the time and effort you put into exercise worth it to you, and how did you get past the excuses for not doing it?

    - I'm worried that when I reach a healthy weight I won't like what I see. I already have excess skin around my middle, and I stare at pictures of me that just don't look like me at all. I like that I'm smaller, but I'm starting to not recognize myself. Have you experienced these things? Did you have to learn to like what "healthy you" looks like?

    Something that I've come to understand when you see people who are fit is that they work at it everyday. To me it's routine now and I went through the same thought processes as you at some stage. I've reconciled with myself in the mirror. I am actually smaller but it took me around 12 months before I absorbed that. I laughed at your comment about jeans. Can relate to that!

    If it's possible I would suggest you find a personal trainer. One that has you committed to exercise incorporating weights at least twice a week. I did this and it really helped to be obligated to someone to "show up". The other benefits are that you feel pretty awesome but as well, it gives you something else to focus on aside from weight loss. Strength gains, fitness level and it can reap magnificent changes in body composition which will ease your mind on loose skin. You may not totally get rid of it but honestly you won't care eventually. It is what is is and we just work with it.

    Personally, I graduated from needing a PT after about three years but the time I spent with her was truly worth it. I moved from being accountable to her to being accountable to myself and what I learnt in that time that gave me the confidence to continue alone. You are time poor but having a trainer will ensure any precious time you spend doing it is not wasted with uncertainty.
  • mamadon
    mamadon Posts: 1,422 Member
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    I've been maintaining for about a year and a half. I still think about food constantly because I still count, measure and weigh everything. Maybe that is obsessive, but I know myself, and it's the best way for me to maintain and I'm perfectly happy with that. As far as body image, it takes a while for your mind to catch up with your body. I have a little excess skin, but am still way happier with my body than I was a few years ago.
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