Ugh... I feel like $#&!. I need some serious motivation and

So much has happened in the last few months between 2 family members being hospitalized (now one doing chemo and then my grandfather being moved to an assisted living facility). My husband almost got laid off, but thankfully didn't. Yet he still started a new job this week, so that's been a new and big adjustment. My toddler was sick with Roseola for a week. And last week I had a miscarriage. I'm exhausted and most of the time all I want to do is stress eat and continue to feel crappy. My son has been sleeping terribly at night and barely taking naps, so by the time he does nap, all I want to do it SIT and relax and maybe catch up on sleep myself. I'm too damn exhausted to go to the gym in the morning because I barely slept all night long, nearly waking up every hour and comforting/nursing my toddler. I'm too damn exhausted to go to the gym at night after my husband gets home from work because I've already put in nearly 12 hours of entertaining and taking care of my toddler (and it's nice to just hang out and relax with my husband since I didn't see him all day). Hubby's new job doesn't have him home early enough in the evenings anymore to help me take care of our kiddo's dinner, bath, and bedtime, so that's tiring. I tried taking my kiddo to the Kids Club and 24 Hour Fitness yesterday (leaving him with a stranger for the first time EVER), and it was a DISASTER. He was crying when I went to check on him and they didn't even page me! My favorite way to workout is do yoga, but the few studios that offer childcare while I do yoga are way down south and super far from where I live. Otherwise, there isn't a class early enough to go to before hubby goes to work, and there isn't one late enough to go to after I put my kiddo to bed (because for 19-months, I'm the ONLY one who can get him to nap and to sleep at night, so it's all on me). I don't have any family members or available friends who can watch my kiddo while I workout, and like I said, I too need a few minutes to relax everyday, and while he naps sometimes that's my only opportunity. I'm still super crushed about the miscarriage (and at my doctor appointment they weighed me in at 140, confirming that I've gained a few pounds in the last few months) so that's had me down and unmotivated to do anything productive (especially with my health and body). But I'm tired of feeling pudgy, and not sexy, and my pants being too tight, and feeling crappy in even a tankini bathing suit. I just feel awful and am having a terrible time turning things around!! Speaking of which, my son who woke up at 4:30am today, went down for a crazy early nap an hour ago and is starting to wake up, which means he won't nap anymore today because he always refuses a second nap, which means he'll be mega cranky until bedtime. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh................