Body confidence / what to wear?

catjan
catjan Posts: 106 Member
edited November 20 in Motivation and Support
Help... The sun is out, and so are everyone's bodies!! But I'm struggling... Just don't know what to wear? I don't feel comfortable unless I'm hiding under a baggy jumper. Friends who are a lot bigger than me don't seem to care about wobbly bits & skimpy clothing! Guess it's my confidence...... Any advice?

Replies

  • MamaBirdBoss
    MamaBirdBoss Posts: 1,516 Member
    edited July 2015
    I want to look good, period. I only look terrible for my MFP shots, LOL. Neither skimpy clothing nor baggy jumpers are flattering on pretty much anyone with wobbly bits. Truly skimpy clothing is flattering on fewer people than they think, and baggy jumpers...perhaps on the massively deforms. :)
  • catjan
    catjan Posts: 106 Member
    MamaBirdBoss wrote: »
    I want to look good, period. I only look terrible for my MFP shots, LOL. Neither skimpy clothing nor baggy jumpers are flattering on pretty much anyone with wobbly bits. Truly skimpy clothing is flattering on fewer people than they think, and baggy jumpers...perhaps on the massively deforms. :)

    That last big made me smile, thanks
  • catjan
    catjan Posts: 106 Member
    edited July 2015
    ? Quote had more words than your post ?
    Don't think I own any skimpy clothing so no fear of scaring anyone!
  • MamaBirdBoss
    MamaBirdBoss Posts: 1,516 Member
    Oh, I edited it for clarity. And apparently to add typos!

    Pretend your body belongs to someone else. Put it in whatever looks good on it and sends a cultural message you want to send. It's pretty simple. :)
  • SkiMummy
    SkiMummy Posts: 33 Member
    Do you have someone (friend, partner) you can go shopping with?
    I make terrible clothing choices - big shapeless tops that are always a size too big, and make me look even more shapeless than I actually am.
    MY Dh on the other hand is a realist and quite good at being objective, so he is good to shop with. I tend to try and find one pair of shorts I like (slightly below the knee) and then add a couple of tops (not too sack like!). By this point i am usually done anyway as I am not a natural shopper, and a couple of basics gives me something to wear when I might bump into people when out and about.
    I am hoping as I loose a bit more weight I might get more excited at the prospect of shopping for Summer clothes.
    Good luck.
  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
    edited July 2015
    Do you have a specific event coming up?
  • catjan
    catjan Posts: 106 Member
    SkiMummy wrote: »
    Do you have someone (friend, partner) you can go shopping with?
    I make terrible clothing choices - big shapeless tops that are always a size too big, and make me look even more shapeless than I actually am.
    MY Dh on the other hand is a realist and quite good at being objective, so he is good to shop with. I tend to try and find one pair of shorts I like (slightly below the knee) and then add a couple of tops (not too sack like!). By this point i am usually done anyway as I am not a natural shopper, and a couple of basics gives me something to wear when I might bump into people when out and about.
    I am hoping as I loose a bit more weight I might get more excited at the prospect of shopping for Summer clothes.
    Good luck.

    I'm putting off shopping as I know I'll hate everything until I'll lose a bit more weight. I also have a suitcase full of summer clothes that are too small!
    Thanks for your good luck wishes
  • catjan
    catjan Posts: 106 Member
    RodaRose wrote: »
    Do you have a specific event coming up?

    I have a holiday planned for August so I'm focused on the weight loss , it's just day to day clothes - I've always struggled with what to wear, even at my goal weight! I try to just blend into the background but that's harder in summer
  • catjan
    catjan Posts: 106 Member
    MamaBirdBoss wrote: »
    Oh, I edited it for clarity. And apparently to add typos!

    Pretend your body belongs to someone else. Put it in whatever looks good on it and sends a cultural message you want to send. It's pretty simple. :)

    Oh if only it belonged to someone else! Lol
    Just don't know what looks good.... But like the idea of seeing it all from a differ point of view. Pretend 'I don't care, don't judge me' rather than 'I got dressed in the dark' ( which is my usual line)
  • Soopatt
    Soopatt Posts: 563 Member
    Fitted clothes are normally far more flattering, particularly cotton and things that are tailored. Resist the baggy stuff! You don't need to go all the way over to sleeveless shirts and short shorts (unless you want to) - fitted long sleeve cotton tops and jeans that fit well look great on everyone. Things that button down the front and v-necks, over t-shirts which give you the mono-boob.
  • catjan
    catjan Posts: 106 Member
    Soopatt wrote: »
    Fitted clothes are normally far more flattering, particularly cotton and things that are tailored. Resist the baggy stuff! You don't need to go all the way over to sleeveless shirts and short shorts (unless you want to) - fitted long sleeve cotton tops and jeans that fit well look great on everyone. Things that button down the front and v-necks, over t-shirts which give you the mono-boob.

    Thank you.
  • Soopatt
    Soopatt Posts: 563 Member
    Just getting a few button up shirts (short or long sleeve) can see you through the whole of summer and not be very expensive, that is what I did this past summer. Think of the Jackie O at the beach in the sixties look. Timeless and easy. When you at goal you can do the whole new wardrobe thing.
  • kendalslimmer
    kendalslimmer Posts: 579 Member
    Okay, so these are my tips.
    1) Wear the correct size - baggy is not sexy.
    2) Wear clothes that draw your eyes down your body (no horizontal stripes!).
    3) A cute neckline enhances your chest, which can do no wrong.
    4) Something that draws attention to your waiste - a belt, a cinch in the fabric etc - will make you seem slimmer, no matter your shape.
    5) Don't mix light/dark colours (e.g. white top and black jeans) as this will cut your figure in half and make you look short and dumpy.
    6) Don't ever wear socks with sandals...
    7) Go for bold colours - no pale pink dresses and wraps.
    8) If you're wearing a print, avoid small delicate ones - this goes for jewellery too and with that jewellery try for long chains that hang down, drawing the eye down your body...
    9) A bit of skin is a great thing: arms and chest (v-neck) are good to show. It's the people who are all wrapped up in summer who stick out like a sore thumb in photographs.
    10) When not in sandals, knee length of 3/4 calf boots (black or brown) are good choices of footwear as they hide your socks and draw the eye down. Trainers are very much a 'body ends here' scenario.

    Just have fun with your shopping sweetie!
  • catjan
    catjan Posts: 106 Member
    kendalslimmer wrote: »
    Okay, so these are my tips.
    1) Wear the correct size - baggy is not sexy.
    2) Wear clothes that draw your eyes down your body (no horizontal stripes!).
    3) A cute neckline enhances your chest, which can do no wrong.
    4) Something that draws attention to your waiste - a belt, a cinch in the fabric etc - will make you seem slimmer, no matter your shape.
    5) Don't mix light/dark colours (e.g. white top and black jeans) as this will cut your figure in half and make you look short and dumpy.
    6) Don't ever wear socks with sandals...
    7) Go for bold colours - no pale pink dresses and wraps.
    8) If you're wearing a print, avoid small delicate ones - this goes for jewellery too and with that jewellery try for long chains that hang down, drawing the eye down your body...
    9) A bit of skin is a great thing: arms and chest (v-neck) are good to show. It's the people who are all wrapped up in summer who stick out like a sore thumb in photographs.
    10) When not in sandals, knee length of 3/4 calf boots (black or brown) are good choices of footwear as they hide your socks and draw the eye down. Trainers are very much a 'body ends here' scenario.

    Just have fun with your shopping sweetie!

    Aw that's lovely , thank you
  • kendalslimmer
    kendalslimmer Posts: 579 Member
    No problem honey! :)
  • blueriotgirl
    blueriotgirl Posts: 151 Member
    I found this website that you put in all your measurements and it gives you a virtual wardrobe with a model. Now granted the model in outfits looks like a computer image would but it tells you why the styles work and why the dont everything from jeans to bathing suits. I actually listened to the advice on jeans and bought some new ones since i lost weight and i tell you i actually look and feel more comfortable. If you want to check it out go to mystylerocks.com. its actually kind of fun.
  • MamaBirdBoss
    MamaBirdBoss Posts: 1,516 Member
    catjan wrote: »
    MamaBirdBoss wrote: »
    Oh, I edited it for clarity. And apparently to add typos!

    Pretend your body belongs to someone else. Put it in whatever looks good on it and sends a cultural message you want to send. It's pretty simple. :)

    Oh if only it belonged to someone else! Lol
    Just don't know what looks good.... But like the idea of seeing it all from a differ point of view. Pretend 'I don't care, don't judge me' rather than 'I got dressed in the dark' ( which is my usual line)

    HA! I'm donating my worn-out stuff now. Can't wait to fit in the new stuff.

    People get too...worked up about stuff. Imagining that what they wear is a projection of how brave they are or how much they love their bodies. Nope. It's silly to wear stuff that makes you look less attractive. The point of clothing, beyond modesty :), is to look good! Ugly stuff, whether it shows too much, too little, or is just wrong for your body, doesn't show you off to best effect.

    There is no instagram filter in the real world. :)
  • MamaBirdBoss
    MamaBirdBoss Posts: 1,516 Member
    BTW, my avatar is an example of me being as unflattering as possible because that's what I want to change. :D
  • whmscll
    whmscll Posts: 2,255 Member
    Google "What Not to Wear" on TLC. This show ran for 10 seasons, and their website encapsulates the most important style tips, for both clothes and makeup. You'll find some really good tips there. Also, if you can find reruns of the show somewhere, watch it!
  • catjan
    catjan Posts: 106 Member
    Aw, thanks for all being so positive & supportive
  • SkinnyKerinny
    SkinnyKerinny Posts: 147 Member
    Great thread! I just organized the "size down" clothes that I really like and the rest are outta here (that's three of the large black garbage bags full of clothes that will be removed from my house).

    I tend to want to hide under larger sizes so I see that's a mistake I've been making. The baggy clothes are going too!
  • rucvicet
    rucvicet Posts: 1 Member
    I donated all the clothes I didn't fit in. It doesn't help. I'm buying the one that makes me feel nice looking and sexy. Not a good idea to wear bigger sizes.
    Feel free and happy with your self!
  • robynebg
    robynebg Posts: 4 Member
    Definitely don't try to hide under baggy clothes - it just makes you look bigger. And don't be so hard on yourself!
  • fishcat123
    fishcat123 Posts: 74 Member
    If you're comfortable in dresses, sundresses are really nice for the summer - cool and there's a cut and style that looks good on everyone. Also, one size can fit well for a range of weights, especially the kind that is loose-ish but cinched in the middle (which is almost universally flattering), so it might makes sense to get a couple now that will probably still look great in August.

    I also have a hard time figuring out what looks good on me. If you have any particularly well put together friends you could go with, that could be helpful.

    Also, your default picture is really really pretty! You probably look a lot nicer than you think :)

  • vixtris
    vixtris Posts: 688 Member
    edited July 2015
    Perhaps get a thin fabric/semi-sheer jacket. I got one recently actually and I love it! I can wear tank tops underneath without worrying about my arms. :) Some capri jeans would be cute, ones that cut off/rolled up at the calf. I also got some denim shorts that cut off right above the knee. They are cute and very appropriate lol.
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