Am I sabotaging myself or just getting comfortable?

schelly81 · July 2015

I've been at this awhile. Highest weight was 230, currently about 165. I want to lose another 15-20 pounds. My workouts are good, 4-6 days a week with a mix of weight lifting and assorted classes. My problem is my eating and drinking. I plan my meals and pre-log, I do great during the week usually. Weekends I often don't bother logging and eat too much and have a few drinks. I've been maintaining for the last 2 months now. I don't know how to get my head in the game! I justify my eating to myself all the time. I let myself make excuses and reasons why I can eat more. BBQ's with friends, camping, dinner out with my husband, stressful day.

so if anyone has any advice, or maybe some insight to what I could possibly do, I'm listening!

Other info. I wear a fitbit which syncs to myfitnesspal. I log all my food on the days when I'm logging, I do not log my binges. I know I'm "suppose" to, but I haven't been able to get in the habit. I lost 65 pounds in the last 15 months. I have my goal set to lose 1.5 pounds per week, the thinking of which is that my fitbit overestimates my calories burned by about 10%. This puts me at 1800 calories a day, I'm 34 and 5'6.

Seriously, I know how to do this, what's stopping me?

Machka9 · July 2015

One thing that seemed to work for me was to give myself a time goal rather than a weight goal. When I started in mid-Feb, my goal was to lose as much weight as I could on a NET 1250 cal diet by mid-June. I stuck to that and lost 15 kg in that time.

Then I took a vacation break and gained 2 kg which is well within a reasonable range.

I'm starting up again, and this time the end of September is my next time goal.

At a rate of 1.5 lb/week, you could reach 15 lbs in 10 weeks. September 15. Maybe give yourself until the end of September to take into consideration fluctuations. Just stick with it until the end of September. And log everything in that time.

nappsmcgee · July 2015

I've been going through the same thing.

I've just been keeping in mind why I started. I also try to be as disciplined (nutrition wise) as I was in the beginning.

whmscll · July 2015

Why don't you read the post you just wrote once a day? It might help you stop sabotaging your efforts.

oh_happy_day · July 2015

Maybe try logging what you consume on the weekends? That may be enough to reign you in a bit.

It sounds like you've done an amazing job - 65lbs is fantastic! I think it's hard to keep your head in the game for a long period of time. Are you bored? Would trying new recipes or new gym classes help? What about signing up for a fun run or something similar to give you something to focus on?

Alternatively, considering you're not actually gaining weight, maybe sitting at maintenance for another month may give you a mental break? Keep logging, keep making good choices but stop trying to lose.

tomatoey · July 2015

Maybe what's stopping you is that you like your life the way it is? You enjoy your weekends and your time with friends, and you feel like making changes to stuff you do on the weekends would mean giving up too much. If it is, that's not the worst thing in the world. You've worked hard and lost a lot of weight. Maintaining at 165 is better than gaining, and it's definitely better for you than 230 was.

If you want to lose more, you'll have to face making some changes, and also find a way to not look at that as a sacrifice. I think the way to do that is to get excited about the changes, if you can. Easier to do with food than drink - e.g. find new foods to BBQ. (eg Portuguese-style grilled sardines, if you haven't tried them, are awesome.). Drinks, get lower cal ones and pace them with Perrier in between.

Regarding stress management, it's worth looking at non-food/drink coping methods.

MamaBirdBoss · July 2015

On days when I go out or eat with friends, I eat little else that day. I also set some of my food aside right away.

charlisobel · July 2015

Congrats on your weight loss so far.

I lost a similar amount a few years ago and then stopped using MFP because honestly I was sick of logging everything and wanted to just get on with life. Predictably I put all of it back on over about five years so am now starting again. Don't waste all your hard work! I think it's fine to give yourself a maintenance break before tackling your last 15lbs. I would try to get out of the stressful day mindset though as I used that as an excuse to eat rubbish and not exercise and before long I classed every day as a stressful one

And we all know healthy eating and exercise are so much better for stress relief!

If you think the problem is boredom I would commit to maintaining your weight for a few months whilst waiting for inspiration to hit. Try some new exercise / classes in the meantime. I used to weigh myself once a week on a Sunday to try to prevent the whole weekend from being a write off.

buxbert · July 2015

oh_happy_day wrote: »

Maybe try logging what you consume on the weekends? That may be enough to reign you in a bit.

It sounds like you've done an amazing job - 65lbs is fantastic! I think it's hard to keep your head in the game for a long period of time. Are you bored? Would trying new recipes or new gym classes help? What about signing up for a fun run or something similar to give you something to focus on?

Alternatively, considering you're not actually gaining weight, maybe sitting at maintenance for another month may give you a mental break? Keep logging, keep making good choices but stop trying to lose.

this is great advice I think! I think you are amazing, losing so much weight when I feel about the same after only 5 kg so far! thank you very much for your honest post! It helps to get me back on track - good luck to you!

Soopatt · July 2015

You have to log those binges! Face up to them, look at them and count them up so that you see them in perspective. I am not even telling you not to have them, I am just telling you that denial is a horrible and insidious thing. There is no mystery in your progress when you are aware of exactly what the numbers look like - only then can you be best informed of the changes you need to make.

If you know exactly what the numbers are, maybe the cut-back can be milder than you think? A beer here or there? Maybe you can make slower progress, but still see the scales go down.

Jennak87 · July 2015

Honestly, the biggest shock to the system is logging binges. I never realised how many calories I was consuming in little midnight feasts.

If I were you, I would act as normal this weekend but log everything after the fact and see how many calories you're actually clocking up. You might find that those 2 days are completely cancelling out all your hard work for the full week. If that's the case, then you can decide if all those indulgences are worth it.

Even if you set your goals to -1.5/ 2lbs per week and just ate at maintenance at the weekend, you should still lose weight. Maybe only 0.5lb or 1lb, it's still a step in the right direction.

Unknown · July 2015

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Sued0nim · July 2015

Make yourself log at the weekends

Even if it's too maintenance and your defecit happens Monday to Friday

It's accountability

You've given yourself permission to do this ... you just need to change that

snowflakesav · July 2015

If you are maintaining that is terrific. Join a challenge and set your goal for a 1/2 pound a week.

editorgrrl · July 2015

schelly81 wrote: »

I wear a fitbit which syncs to myfitnesspal. I log all my food on the days when I'm logging, I do not log my binges. I know I'm "suppose" to, but I haven't been able to get in the habit. I lost 65 pounds in the last 15 months. I have my goal set to lose 1.5 pounds per week, the thinking of which is that my fitbit overestimates my calories burned by about 10%. This puts me at 1800 calories a day, I'm 34 and 5'6".

Your Fitbit burn is TDEE (total daily energy expenditure), the calories necessary to maintain your current weight. If you eat at a reasonable deficit from that, you will lose weight. (But you still need to log everything you eat & drink accurately & honestly.)

Connect your accounts at http://www.myfitnesspal.com/fitbit

Enable negative calorie adjustments in your diary settings: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/account/diary_settings

Set your goal to .5 lb. for every 25 lbs. you're overweight: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/account/change_goals_guided

You can learn more in the Fitbit Users group: http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/1290-fitbit-users

ercarroll311 · July 2015

Ask yourself on the days that you're starting to make excuses, "Can I just stick to it today?". Take it one day at a time and it won't seem like such a big feat, or like you've got so far to go.

sarahrosheen · July 2015

i do the same. my 'cheat day' is Friday where I can eat whatever I want but some morphs into a cheat weekend. I find it better if I just have cheat dinner/night on Friday then plan a hike on Saturday or something to get my mind back into healthy mode !

ASKyle · July 2015

schelly81 wrote: »

I've been at this awhile. Highest weight was 230, currently about 165. I want to lose another 15-20 pounds. My workouts are good, 4-6 days a week with a mix of weight lifting and assorted classes. My problem is my eating and drinking. I plan my meals and pre-log, I do great during the week usually. Weekends I often don't bother logging and eat too much and have a few drinks. I've been maintaining for the last 2 months now. I don't know how to get my head in the game! I justify my eating to myself all the time. I let myself make excuses and reasons why I can eat more. BBQ's with friends, camping, dinner out with my husband, stressful day.

so if anyone has any advice, or maybe some insight to what I could possibly do, I'm listening!

Other info. I wear a fitbit which syncs to myfitnesspal. I log all my food on the days when I'm logging, I do not log my binges. I know I'm "suppose" to, but I haven't been able to get in the habit. I lost 65 pounds in the last 15 months. I have my goal set to lose 1.5 pounds per week, the thinking of which is that my fitbit overestimates my calories burned by about 10%. This puts me at 1800 calories a day, I'm 34 and 5'6.

Seriously, I know how to do this, what's stopping me?

See bolded. Why not? There's your problem.

AbsoluteTara79 · July 2015

I've been slacking too because I'm pretty happy and the remaining weight I want to lose is pure vanity. But I do log when I overeat. Like two 3k days this weekend.

I don't see it as sabotaging myself. The motivation has just tanked because I'm 90% happy with my progress.

I'd just start with the commitment to log and go from there.

Adrobins · July 2015

First of all, congratulations for your success. This is amazing.

I face the same problem... I'd like to lose another 10-15 pounds, but when I'm away for a while (like this weekend... I'm going to a cottage with people who.. drink a lot and love to eat red meat). It's nuts what 1-2 days of "not caring too much" can do to your body.

The truth is only you can make those decisions... The same way you decided to lose all that weight initially. Just keep it up. You're not sabotaging yourself, you're just a human being. Accept those feelings, they're just feelings. Otherwise you can easily start sabotaging yourself for real.

You can doooo iiiiit... yesss youuu caaaaaaan!

carakit · July 2015

I just posted an almost identical post yesterday! I also do great during the week and then binge on the weekends and don't log it. I have decided screw it I'm logging everything no matter how ugly it is!! Its the only way that I am going to be able to hold myself accountable. Congrats on losing 65lbs!!!

kshama2001 · July 2015

schelly81 wrote: »

I've been at this awhile. Highest weight was 230, currently about 165. I want to lose another 15-20 pounds. My workouts are good, 4-6 days a week with a mix of weight lifting and assorted classes. My problem is my eating and drinking. I plan my meals and pre-log, I do great during the week usually. Weekends I often don't bother logging and eat too much and have a few drinks. I've been maintaining for the last 2 months now. I don't know how to get my head in the game! I justify my eating to myself all the time. I let myself make excuses and reasons why I can eat more. BBQ's with friends, camping, dinner out with my husband, stressful day.

so if anyone has any advice, or maybe some insight to what I could possibly do, I'm listening!

Other info. I wear a fitbit which syncs to myfitnesspal. I log all my food on the days when I'm logging, I do not log my binges. I know I'm "suppose" to, but I haven't been able to get in the habit. I lost 65 pounds in the last 15 months. I have my goal set to lose 1.5 pounds per week, the thinking of which is that my fitbit overestimates my calories burned by about 10%. This puts me at 1800 calories a day, I'm 34 and 5'6.

Seriously, I know how to do this, what's stopping me?

Well, there's lots of things going on here, but for starters, I plugged in your stats and the only way I could get you 1,800 calories was to set your Activity Level at Very Active: Spend most of the day doing heavy physical activity (e.g. bike messenger, carpenter). So I think something might be off with your goal settings.

Also, with only 20 pounds to lose, try a less aggressive goal of 0.5 pounds per week. Overly aggressive goals are discouraging.

And like others have said, do log the binges. Accountability and mindfulness are key to weight loss!

jessiruthica · July 2015

I'm in exactly this position. I've lost about 65 pounds and have about 15 to go and it has definitely gotten more difficult to stick to the things I know that work. Some of it is fatigue - I've been at this for nearly a year and my brain is tired of doing it. BUT, in order to maintain, this has to have been a life-long change. I keep hoping it will get easier / more natural but it is still something I think about a lot in order to keep the change going.

The fact that you've been maintaining is GOOD! It means you haven't reverted completely to old habits. But do be careful that you don't let your weight creep back up. A friend recently said she has no idea how she gained 40 pounds because it happened over 2 years.

I've been taking break from logging on the weekends in that I don't do it all day but I'm aware of what I've eaten and try to log before bed.

dubird · July 2015

If you don't log your binges and everything you eat, then you are sabotaging yourself. You have to account for EVERYTHING you eat, even if all you can do is an estimate.

As for me, I've had trouble getting my calories right to actually lose weight with my Fitbit. What I ended up doing was setting both Fitbit and MFP to sedentary, wearing it on my non-dominant wrist but have it set to dominant. It's not perfect, and I still had to fiddle with my calorie allowance to start losing again, but I've finally got it set to an amount that creates the deficit for me. Actual exercise adds on, but if I don't exercise, it's much easier to keep on track. I know there are formulas to follow for calculating everything, but I've yet to seen an explanation for them that makes sense to me. Math are hard. ><

corriebenedict · July 2015

I was 245 and got down to 175 and told myself I'd stop there...and then 30 lbs came out of no where while I wasn't paying attention...and now I'm back to work. Don't lose focus or you'll regret it later in the game. Try giving yourself ONE free day (Saturday or Sunday) and log everything else religiously. We've all been there...best of luck to you!

Am I sabotaging myself or just getting comfortable?

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