I can't stop crying, i'm so unhappy.
MrsLloyd2B
Posts: 5
I have always had weight problems but in 2009 before becoming pregnant i got to size 14, only 1 dress size from the dream body after being size 18 - 24 most my life!
Now after having my son i'm back to 16-18 and so unhappy.
We are getting married 12th August and i thought i'd have lost at least a little by now but nope, i've been pre-ocupied moving house, wedding planning and being mummy that i forgot to even think about losing weight until i looked in the mirror today and it hit me.
I'm fat and ugly and going to look like a whale in a wedding dress.
How can i lose weight in 10 weeks? As much as possible....from now....and fit it in with un-packing the new house, being mummy and house wifey?! oh and going back to work in July!!! So so so so not happy!
Now after having my son i'm back to 16-18 and so unhappy.
We are getting married 12th August and i thought i'd have lost at least a little by now but nope, i've been pre-ocupied moving house, wedding planning and being mummy that i forgot to even think about losing weight until i looked in the mirror today and it hit me.
I'm fat and ugly and going to look like a whale in a wedding dress.
How can i lose weight in 10 weeks? As much as possible....from now....and fit it in with un-packing the new house, being mummy and house wifey?! oh and going back to work in July!!! So so so so not happy!
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Replies
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I've never seen a bride that wasn't beautiful - you have someone who loves you very much just as you are.
I know these sound like platitudes but it is true. You can lose some weight before your wedding and I'm sure you'll look brilliant. But the important thing is you'll have an amazing time with the man you love!0 -
I have a pretty busy life style with taking care of my 2 boys working full time, cleaning my house and a friends house, but I have managed to lose 18 lbs in 115 days! If you have a stroller take the little one for walks! I usually walk/jog/run about 5 miles when I can get out of the house before dark! I have also found tae bo enjoyable! I have found the dvd's at walmart for $10, would be a good thing to do while the little one is napping! Just remember to log everything and try to get in exercise, and water water water!! At least 8 glasses of water a day!!
MFP is a great place to be, lots of support and motivation here! You can friend me if you would like!! I am sure you can do this, it is almost June but you have 2 full months to work at it!!0 -
First, stop crying!! You are beautiful and your family is beautiful!!! You have so much to be happy about. I completely understand about feeling so unhappy about your body and I know it's so important to look absolutely stunning on YOUR day, and YOU WILL!! I've heard it only takes 20lbs to drop a size and you can do MORE than that in 10 weeks DEFINITELY! Just focus and constantly remind yourself of your goal! This site has helped me so much and I've only been on it a week! There is so much support here! YOU CAN do this and YOU WILL!!!! We are here for you!!!
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I've been there, when my wedding dress fit me at the store when I bought it and then 6 weeks later I could get it on all the way I was so unhappy. I cried for hours and then when they had to fix it because I gained a whole dress size, I cried myself to sleep for two days. So my sister and I decided we needed to change and we had a 6 year old boy running the house plus my husband was living with us and we tons of pets to take care of I know the feeling.
Easy simple changes can be made if you think about it at the store when buying food. Start with no more one can of pop a day, make sure the rest is water. Portion control is another one that we don't think of. And the first week will be the hardest but if you cut your portions in half no matter how "bad" the food is, it makes a huge difference.
I lost two dress sizes in 8 weeks before my wedding, at the last fitting they had to do an emergency fix to the dress. I started at size 24 went to 26 then down to a 22. Its possible to diet small and still have a big effect. Don't cry, and no one ever looks like a whale in their wedding dress, I looked myself the same way but in my pictures I look good and I felt great on that day and so will you! I promise.0 -
First, stop crying, there's no reason to be unhappy. You've got a baby which is the greatest gift in the world. You've also got the toughest job in the world, being a mom. You're getting married and you're loved. You've got so much to be happy for.
Stay with us here and track everything you eat and all the exercise you do. You'll lose the weight and however much that is will be a triumph.
Stay strong for your family and for yourself. Enjoy life!0 -
I agree with Eats. You have so much wonderful stuff going on, a fiance that loves you, a beautiful baby boy. Concentrate on all those positives, then pick one small thing each week you can change and before you know it you'll have a lifestyle change that will produce results. You can do this, there is a great community of really nice and positive folks here if you reach out. My wife (hootsmamma) is a great cheerleader. Friend us if you need more support.0
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I know you don't want to hear it but I'm sure you'll look amazing. I was a size 24/26 when I got married and looked amazing!! As for losing weight its all about what you eat and what you exercise. When you signed up for MFP You should have gotten a choice as to how much weight you want to lose, and your calorie deficit. Try Jillian Michaels 30 Day shred and push yourself, Your goal isn't that that unattainable,In 10 weeks you could lose 20lbs if you eat right and work out.0
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First, stop crying!! You are beautiful and your family is beautiful!!! You have so much to be happy about. I completely understand about feeling so unhappy about your body and I know it's so important to look absolutely stunning on YOUR day, and YOU WILL!! I've heard it only takes 20lbs to drop a size and you can do MORE than that in 10 weeks DEFINITELY! Just focus and constantly remind yourself of your goal! This site has helped me so much and I've only been on it a week! There is so much support here! YOU CAN do this and YOU WILL!!!! We are here for you!!!
You took the words right out of my mouth! It is IMPOSSIBLE to lose weight in the wrong frame of mind. You have to have a can-do attitude. Just start doing what you can and you will be able to determine if you can do more. Do what you can. Start slow and don't stress out about it. Your hubby-to-be obviously already loves you the way that you are. So decide that you want to do this for yourself and start today. Best of luck to you!0 -
You have so much to rejoice about , new baby, new home and a wedding to the one you love! Feel good about all that and then you will get the motavation to feel good about changing your weight. I betcha that the depression is the baby blues and that too will pass. Strap the baby into a sling carrier to ad extra weight while unpacking boxes, the bending and lifting while carrying the little one will help to bring up your heart rate and also give you extra toning, not to mention bonding with your bundle of joy. The baby is a lot more fun than a set of weights for lifting. Make a plan, get up, get baby ready for the day and yourself, then an hour of unpacking, an hour of walking the baby, an hour of planning for the wedding, repeat. Find time also to just have "you" time, when the baby is in bed, have a nap or a hot bath for an hour, then repeat the routine again. Things will get done and weight will adjust. Good luck and smile you have the world in the palm of your hand!0
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You know drinking 8cups of ice cold water burns around 70 calories and I will share one of my secrets with you, keep squeezing your stomach and other volunteer muscles, do this whenever you remember. Think at the cellular level, everytime we sqeeze volunteer muscles they burn ATP(energy). Look for Kapalbhati exercise on youtube. And most important keep smiling(uses 22 facial muscles).
Congratulations on your wedding.0 -
If you really, really want this and put in the effort, you CAN do it! My recommendation would be to eat as many whole, natural and unprocessed foods as possible and keep to your calorie goals set by MFP....lean protein, veggies, fruits, whole grains. Just tell yourself, for 10 weeks you can do anything, including eating healthy and exercising. By then, you'll be in such a great routine, you'll just keep it going!0
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You have so much to rejoice about , new baby, new home and a wedding to the one you love! Feel good about all that and then you will get the motavation to feel good about changing your weight. I betcha that the depression is the baby blues and that too will pass. Strap the baby into a sling carrier to ad extra weight while unpacking boxes, the bending and lifting while carrying the little one will help to bring up your heart rate and also give you extra toning, not to mention bonding with your bundle of joy. The baby is a lot more fun than a set of weights for lifting. Make a plan, get up, get baby ready for the day and yourself, then an hour of unpacking, an hour of walking the baby, an hour of planning for the wedding, repeat. Find time also to just have "you" time, when the baby is in bed, have a nap or a hot bath for an hour, then repeat the routine again. Things will get done and weight will adjust. Good luck and smile you have the world in the palm of your hand!
Excellent advice rhodenizer
The Baby Blues are probably a big part of how you are feeling, which is totally normal and will pass if you hang in there. Brest feeding will also help if it is an option.
A lot of people who believe in you are sending good thoughts today.0 -
Oh honey, I wish I could come and give you a big hug!
You are under a lot of pressure right now, and your body is probably hanging on to everything it can - its really hard to lose weight when you're under stress. Can you do some relaxation classes, yoga or meditation to help you chill out?
Every bride wants her day to be perfect, so your concern is understandable. Do what you can - take a variety of exercise, make sure your diet is as excellent as you can make it, and know that when you walk down the aisle with a big smile on your face you will be radiant.0 -
you're getting married, just had a kid, moving into a new house, and you are going to be working soon. and to top it all off, you're starting to get healthy. sounds pretty awesome to me!
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I have always had weight problems but in 2009 before becoming pregnant i got to size 14, only 1 dress size from the dream body after being size 18 - 24 most my life!
Now after having my son i'm back to 16-18 and so unhappy.
We are getting married 12th August and i thought i'd have lost at least a little by now but nope, i've been pre-ocupied moving house, wedding planning and being mummy that i forgot to even think about losing weight until i looked in the mirror today and it hit me.
I'm fat and ugly and going to look like a whale in a wedding dress.
How can i lose weight in 10 weeks? As much as possible....from now....and fit it in with un-packing the new house, being mummy and house wifey?! oh and going back to work in July!!! So so so so not happy!
enough said, you have a LOT going on and some of those things involve stress and hormones, don't push too hard and drive yourself nuts over it.
Maybe just get some yoga tapes and do some deep breathing and walk with the baby in a stroller and just say that your body is where it is right now for a reason but it's not forever....don't go trying to make it all fly off before the wedding, you will end up hurting yourself physically and mentally.
it will happen for you0 -
ps you will not look like a whale and I will tell you you are your own harshest critic. You are going to look amazing and you are somebody's mommy right now and that somebody loves you full force no matter if you are size 18 or 14....and obviously the groom to be is not as shallow and only thinking about the baby weight and what dress size you are.
it will happen but don't push for a 10 week sprint go slow ans steady for a life long marathon....now if I could only take my own advice!0 -
I know you don't want to hear it but I'm sure you'll look amazing. I was a size 24/26 when I got married and looked amazing!! As for losing weight its all about what you eat and what you exercise. When you signed up for MFP You should have gotten a choice as to how much weight you want to lose, and your calorie deficit. Try Jillian Michaels 30 Day shred and push yourself, Your goal isn't that that unattainable,In 10 weeks you could lose 20lbs if you eat right and work out.
my thoughts exactly0 -
I have baby blues too. I am crying for every reason and no reason at all. After seeing my post partum belly, I realized I looked like a deflated balloon all over.
Try to realize it's likely baby blues and get help for that first. Then focus on being healthy, not so much on your weight. Well, that's what I'm trying to do. For me focusing on being healthy means getting support from people on here like you and tracking my calories.
Hang in there and please don't be so hard on yourself.0 -
You sound like you could be suffering from post partpartum depression. Your wedding, moving houses and going back to work are all triggers that can increase your anxiety. If you havent talked to your doctor yet, you should.
Logging on here today and documenting your feelings and getting them out is very helpful. I know you're tired, you're exhausted and you feel overwelmed but hang in there. Eating healthy is important. Dont graze, make a plan and stick to it. You didnt mention if you are nursing or not. If you are nutrition is even more important, and remember nursing burns calories too.
Continue to log in here everyday. Documentaion will help you see where your weaknesses are. Also remember when you exercise you end up having more energy every day.
Good luck .0 -
Take those tears and turn them into determination!! Make it a point to start focusing on you! Here's a cute little video you might get a kick out of - someone messaged it to me on Facebook a while back:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=keWCS942iFM 0 -
First off big hugs I know how hard it can be with a busy life and moving house, also like stephlake said have you though about post natal deprestion? how old is your lil one.
I love the support on here so keep coming on it realy helps and log EVERYTHING I have found that I have made simple changes just by seeing what im eating and what exercise Iv been doing,0 -
Wow......such awesome responses for you! This site is unbelievable for support and comfort and StevLL and Hootsmamma are on my friend list and they are AWESOME supporters, which is what you need. I agree with what everyone is saying, especially about the baby blues and feeling overwhelmed. Just breathe and remember that YOU ARE IN CONTROL and you CAN GET THROUGH THIS and YOU CAN LOSE THE WEIGHT....but first you must make a plan...a short-term goal, like eating healthier and taking that walk with the baby. Then in a week or so while baby is sleeping, pop in an exercise dvd and go for it! Keep changing up your exercise routine and logging your food (LET THE MFP PROGRAM WORK FOR YOU) and before you know it, you'll have lost the weight and your wedding day will be everything you want it to be! Just remember, we want to see pics of you on your beautiful day! Good luck new momma and friend me also if you want! :flowerforyou:0
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I got married on Aug. 12, 2007 ---- At 8 months pregnant! Needless to say, when we found out I was expecting the invitations had already been sent out and the dress had already been bought (and believe me, it WASN'T a maternity gown). I was devastated, but I took the best care of myself as I could leading up to the day of and I PROMISE you, if you do that you will feel like a million bucks when you walk down the isle. Start making healthy choices, work out when you can (I know how hard that can be with a little one), and just take the best care of yourself that you can in the next 10 weeks and you will feel wonderful on your day. I'm pulling for you!
Jamie0 -
Being overweight is not reason to be unhappy with your life. I love my life but I'm choosing to better my life so I can be healthier. I've been a size 22/24 for a long time. I'm 28 and I would kill to have someone that loved me just the way I am,! You have that. They love you for your heart and have taken the time to know who you are apart from your weight challenges. Weight is something that can always change, but your family needs you and love you.
Your husband to be is going to see your in your white dress, with his heart thumping and a smile on his face when he sees you coming down the aisle. You should be able to find 30 minutes a day to work out. Do it when you baby is taking a nap. The house chores can wait. We are here to support you! You can't do this alone, but we can do this together!0 -
Dont give up, simply start walking/running and work up to 30-45 minutes per day (taking 1-2 days off a week) and use the daily tracking tool on this site, plenty of time until August. Yes you have a baby, take the baby with you in a stroller! I have 3 kids you need to make it happen!
Also if you have a smart phone thre app for this site is wonderful!
Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter0 -
Fortunately I dont have the stress of moving but I am a stay at home mom to 3 under age 4 and house wife while enrolled in school full time. I've lost 36 pounds in about 6 months and what I do is this:
Take the kids for a walk 3 times a week for about an hour each time and on the days I dont do that I do dvd vide exercise after they have gone to sleep (found then at wal mart!) My calories are also at or below 1500 net nightly.
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First, stop crying, there's no reason to be unhappy. You've got a baby which is the greatest gift in the world. You've also got the toughest job in the world, being a mom. You're getting married and you're loved. You've got so much to be happy for.
Stay with us here and track everything you eat and all the exercise you do. You'll lose the weight and however much that is will be a triumph.
Stay strong for your family and for yourself. Enjoy life!
Took the words out of my mouth! You CAN do it, promise! I am a BUSY mom of 5 and a wife, you just have to make time for yourself. *hugs*0 -
youre not ugly.you have made a very positive lifestyle choice! changing our appearance by diet and exercise is a process and you shouldn't give yourself a small window of 10 weeks. instead do whats right for your body day by day and I promise you the results will come rolling in. dont treat this as a regime of diet and exercise...treat this as a new way of living that will give you and your family a wonderful and very happy future.0
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Breast Feeding!!! Lactation speeds up your metabolism and is known to naturally result in weight loss among new moms. By breast feeding, your body kicks into overdrive making more milk and your metabolic rate sky rockets. Plus, the advantages to your infant are too numerous to mention here (I wrote a masters thesis about breast feeding in 2005- it is great stuff! Delivering everything from increased immunity to your infant to specialized bacteria to aid in digestion and line your baby's intestines). Plus, it's a great way to unwind and take a time out from a stressful day while bonding with your new family and melting away lots of pounds. Just an idea... you are amazing. Everything will work out just fine, even better than you think. You'll see! Weddings do this to everyone, it's normal to feel like a mess! I did! It get's better, I promise! 0
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