Intuitive Eating

ManiacalLaugh wrote: »

AnnaBellQ14 wrote: »

I want to learn to eat like the thin people eat. They never worry about counting calories. What is their secret? I think I know, eat when hungry, stop when full, and move. That's where I want to be a year from now. What are your thoughts?

As a formally obese person, I've tried almost everything and that includes intuitive eating. I'm not going to say it's bunk because of course people who are not dieting have operated by this idea their entire lives and it's worked. I will say though, it didn't work for me.

The main issue is, unless you've fully fixed your relationship with food, you're always going to have moments when you eat when you're not really hungry. I tricked myself so many times thinking "yep, that's legitimate hunger. I should eat" when it was actually just the extreme desire to snack/boredom/thirst/gas/etc....

And if you are really paying attention to your physical cues, it takes a lot of mental energy. So much mental energy, that I would argue weighing and logging is easier; at least then, you can get it off your mind while knowing exactly where you stand for the day.

But, that's just me. I'd love to get to the point where I could do something as simple as eating without a phone app - I just know myself enough to realize that logging (at least of some sort) is going to be a semi-permanent thing for me if I want my changes to stick.

Hope it works out for you!

SuggaD wrote: »

No one is "naturally thin." Their relationship with food and activity level is, as you said, just better than those who are or have been overweight. I'm in maintenance and I don't count calories. I also recognize that because of a period in my life when I didn't have enough to eat, I can't leave food on the plate. So for me, its not really about eating until I'm full and stop. I just make pretty good decisions in what I choose to eat and how I fill my plate and it all seems to balance out. I've been around the same weight range for almost 2 years and am very active. You don't have to count for the rest of your life.

lemurcat12 wrote: »

I should add that I'm skeptical that humans naturally ate until they weren't hungry and maintained that way. It doesn't surprise me that only a minority of humans in the situation of plenty that we are in today are good at it.

Over most of human history it wasn't an issue--scarcity was. When there was excess food letting it go to waste because not hungry would have been a bad idea. Sure, we learned to preserve food, but we also were flexible in our eating schedules, likely feasting in some seasons and on some days and fasting (or eating much less) on others.

Even in more developed societies where food was more consistently available people tended to control food consumption through culture--regular eating times and developed ideas about when and how and what to eat--and not simple instinct. That to me is more consistent with how human beings are about all sorts of things than this idea that we just naturally should regulate our eating perfectly.

So it doesn't really bother me or make me think there's something wrong with me (vs. a "naturally" thin person) that I have to be mindful of my food choices.

I do think it's interesting how people differ on whether they are driven by hunger/satiety more strongly or not. I have mentioned this before, but I have two cats--and yes domesticated cats who are fed aren't really in a natural environment--and one of them regulates his eating perfectly. He seems to have hungry days and non hungry days, and he also seems to get super active before mealtimes, as if he is simulating hunting. The other one (who struggles with his weight, which of course means we struggle with trying to keep him from being obese) loves food and will overeat if given an opportunity. He also seems--could be imagining this, but I don't think so--to eat when stressed/upset, and if you feed him less he becomes less active. Sigh.

MamaBirdBoss wrote: »

jemhh wrote: »

When I was thin, I did not eat when hungry and stop when full. I ate at my assigned meal times and if I liked the food I ate it, if I didn't, I just didn't eat. Instead, I'd eat at the next meal.

Pretty much this, too.

"Naturally thin" people have a very, very different relationship with food than "naturally obese" people. They eat because it's mealtime. They eat about what they think, mentally, they SHOULD eat. If they don't like what's there, they'll just..not eat for a while. And it's no big deal.

I usually lost 2-5lbs at summer camp every year because I didn't much care for the food.

Watching "naturally thin" kids versus "naturally fat" kids is interesting.

Two extremes:

My daughter (a "natural thin") was holding her belly today and looking dejected. I asked, "What's wrong? Is your tummy upset?" "No. I'm hungry, but I can't think of what to eat!" Now, the house is full of stuff she LIKES to eat just fine. She just couldn't think of anything at that moment that was worth the effort of getting up and getting it out and eating it despite the fact that it was 2pm and she hadn't eaten all day. I made her a grilled cheese sandwich, and she went on her way, but to her, being on the lighter side of "naturally skinny" in terms of her attitudes towards food, the cost of physical hunger was less than the cost of going to the effort of eating something she was less than enthusiastic about.

To her, food is an inconvenience in life that you have to put up with, aside from the occasional treat. Even with unlimited access to treats, though, the excitement quickly wanes.

In addition, my kids will never walk if they can run or skip. They'll choose the outdoor thing before the indoor. They even turn TV into a cardio event.

The neighbors have a "naturally fat" kid. He LOVES food. Everything to him--every trip, every event, everything--is centered around what he can eat there. Taking him to a potluck is horrific because he literally spends the entire time shoveling as much food into his body as he possibly can, and if he's restricted, he tries to sneak food. He lies about what he's eaten. He rummages in neighbors' pantries. He hides food. He'll wake up super-early to get in an extra breakfast before anyone else is awake, go back to bed, then wake up and pretend he hasn't had anything. He'll get three slices of pizza and with each one will loudly proclaim that he hasn't eaten ANYTHING ELSE that day (even though he just finished a full meal less than half an hour ago).

To him, food is the most important thing in life. It's more important than friends, family, games, trips, absolutely anything. If he has one love, it's food.

In addition, he will never run when he can walk. He will always choose to be inside rather than outside. He sits in front of a TV or video game like a zombie.

My "naturally thin" kids are not only allowed free range of the kitchen, they get yelled at regularly for not eating when there is something more fun to do, and they are FORCED to stop playing and put some food into their bodies. They are in the 25th to 40th percentile on BMI for their ages. (5th to 84th is healthy range!)

My neighbor's "naturally fat" kids are supposed to eat no more than what is in the meal plan at certain times a day. One kid is obese, and the other is within spitting distance of obese.

Some of these behaviors were entirely trained into the kids by their parents. The other family puts a HUGE emphasis on food and usually constant rewards preschoolers with food and encourages them to eat non-stop. They substituted food for attention in the kids' early years. Both parents are obese, and neither value athleticism for its own sake, nor do they hold activity in any particular place of importance. Their recreation is ALWAYS sedentary.

We put extremely little emphasis on food. When we travel, we normally pack or make 2 out of 3 meals. We always carry a cooler so we can have "our own" breakfasts and either lunch or dinner (depending on the vacation). We also pack our own "healthy-ish" snacks--we don't make a big point of them being "healthy", but they're things that won't make us feel sick (from eating more fats than our bodies are used to) or sluggish (from being so calorie-dense that they upset our stomachs). Our vacations are ALWAYS centered around physical exertion of some sort. Even if we're seeing a city, we do tons of walking. We consider that a normal part of a vacation and not something in need of an extra reward or an extra rest (which is what the neighbors do).

I routinely modify recipes by doubling the veg and slashing the fats. Our "desserts" are most often smoothies with fruit and a tiny bit of sugar or honey, if we have them, and if we have something more, the adults trade off dinner calories for dessert calories--"Remember to leave room for the XYZ!"

The neighbors, when they modify recipes, add more fats and sugars. They have a lot of dessert on top of their meals more days--and it's a pure addition. They say things like, "Butter is natural and margarine is not" or "Yeah, it has a lot of oil, but it's olive oil, so it's a healthy oil" and emphasize making "good food" from scratch. They eat only a few vegetables and never add more.