Losing 75-80 pounds for the second time....maybe

FightTheGoodFightofFood
FightTheGoodFightofFood Posts: 2 Member
edited November 21 in Motivation and Support
This is my first post, and it might be pretty negative, I just need to put my thoughts somewhere. I say I'm trying again, I'm not really motivated.

I had a membership here from 2011-2015 (March) I never thought I would be that person who gained all my weight back. It's pretty humiliating and angering. I know I'm responsible, but I've had a hard 2 years and I'm an emotional eater. I know it's up to me to lose the weight again, but I don't know if I can.

I lost my job in May, and can't afford a gym membership like I used to. People say you don't need a gym to work out/lose weight--that's true for a lot of people, but I do need one. I have cerebral palsy on my right side, home work outs are near impossible without major altering and even then, who knows if I'm doing it right?

I had a trade gym membership for 1 month where I worked at a daycare as a trade for membership, but then the manager closed the daycare and I lost my free membership. Paid $45 for a background check for 1 month of "free use." The manager was unsympathetic and not willing to reconsider. That happened the same month I lost my actual job. So it was a bad month.

I don't even know where to start, I feel like nothing I do will work. I guess I can go walking, but after awhile that stops working doesn't it? Because you need to increase the intensity level and walking is very mild.

I took a step and rejoined MFP a few days ago, but my mind is in a bad place. I hate my body, I hate myself, and I'm angry that I let myself get to where I am now. I feel like no one will be rooting me on this time. "OH, maybe she'll keep the weight off a second time....pathetic." I wish I was motivated, I just don't know how to find it.

Replies

  • Jill814
    Jill814 Posts: 30 Member
    you need to want to lose the weight, i know you said you are in a bad spot and very angry (i understand trust me!) but you need to change that. accept what is and do something about it. so with that being said you CAN NOT out train a bad diet. eating is 80% of it. so start there and of course walking is great! its better then doing nothing right?? its a start. and you can always add speed/distance maybe even a lil jog if your able? dont toss in the towel yet...you got this!!
  • BoxerBrawler
    BoxerBrawler Posts: 2,032 Member
    You are defeating yourself before you even get started. You can't start to make positive changes if you already have "I can't" in your heart. You joined here again, there's a first step in the right direction. Today make another small, healthy and positive change. Baby steps...

    As far the cerebral palsy limiting your workouts... take a look at several videos that depict people with all sorts of disabilities, including not having any limbs doing things like Cross Fit, etc. Don't let that hold you back.

    Keep walking....
  • daniellepstewart209
    daniellepstewart209 Posts: 32 Member
    Stop fretting over this! I know it's easier said than done but you are further than you think.
    Eat 'normally' for a week, weigh everything, and be brutally honest. Get a starting calorie consumption, look at the empty calories you consume.
    And reduce it, if it's a huge gap to what you should be eating, gradually reduce it to the recommended level. Weigh everything in grams not cups, weigh liquids in ml including what you drink (water too! You can see if you need to increase your water consumption)
    Don't lie to yourself, don't use average or pre portioned nutritional info. It's usually wrong. Weigh it.
    Walk more (as much as you can!) if you can afford it get a activity band to accurately log what you walk/ calories burnt. Mi fit by xaiomi (Chinese version of Fitbit) it's cheap and effective. Amazon sell them for £20 (cheaper now!) don't know the cost in dollars, look it up!
    Eat as little processed food as possible. Protien is good to fill you up! Veggies are your best friend. Don't use oils they just use up calories. Get a 1cal spray oil! Just the same.
    You can do this! You have before! It's gonna be harder, and more of a challenge but YOU CAN GET TO YOUR GOAL xxx good luck my lovley
  • ash_young138
    ash_young138 Posts: 1 Member
    So I've been looking for a friend on here and I seriously think you should message me. I was over 100 lbs over weight, ended up losing 140 lbs, got too skinny, gained 20lbs back on purpose..... Maintained for 4 years then all of a sudden last year gained 50 lbs back. I'm not back to my heaviest but I'm definitely feeling miserable and mad at myself and can't believe I'm back to this. I also have medical restrictions on things I can do and lost all the weight originally without a gym membership or anything because I couldn't afford it. I feel like maybe both of us could use someone to talk to that gets it. Everyone else just says to me "don't worry, you did it before" and it's not that easy sometimes.
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