Tips on social eating?

abigailjoywiebe
abigailjoywiebe Posts: 4 Member
edited November 21 in Health and Weight Loss
I'm a social eater. If someone else is eating, I want to eat with them. I've finally gotten past the point of having to eat with them, but when friends invite me over for dinner and they serve pizza, I have a really hard time saying no and/or don't know how to tell them I'm trying to watch what I eat without being rude. Any tips?
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Replies

  • kittywrangler
    kittywrangler Posts: 81 Member
    I avoid dinners I can't track. I wish I could help but really I want tips too!
  • paperpudding
    paperpudding Posts: 9,284 Member
    Avoiding dinners you can't track doesn't sound a good long term plan.

    My suggestion is to have a small piece of pizza and estimate calories by comparing to something similar on the data base.
    Likewise if going anywhere else, have a small portion and estimate calories.

    And/ or take some low calorie food of your own to share.

    A lifestyle change has to fit into real life and that includes socialising.
  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
    Sometimes is it o.k. to be "rude" when you are doing what is right for yourself. :) It is not really rude anyway -- think of it as a way to show love to yourself.
  • MeiannaLee
    MeiannaLee Posts: 338 Member
    Have self control
  • ExRelaySprinter
    ExRelaySprinter Posts: 874 Member
    When i know i'm going to have a big Meal out, i just eat lighter that day and do some extra exercise.
    Then i can enjoy the Pizza or whatever without having to worry too much.
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10213155/a-guide-to-going-out-to-eat/p1
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,626 Member
    why cant you eat pizza?

    ask them what they are having and plan for it.

    no biggie.

    i eat pizza, burgers, fast food all the time. had a giant ice cream sunday last night. it was orgasmic.
  • HealthyVitamins
    HealthyVitamins Posts: 432 Member
    Personally, and if its close friends, I usually ask them what food we are going to be having that night, if its something I don't want to eat like pizza, they are good enough friends for me to feel comfortable by telling them I'll pass.

    If they aren't close friends, and I don't know they are giving me food until I get there, I tell them politely I have already eaten.

    Sorry, if they are offended because I don't want to eat their food then they aren't worth hanging around with :)
  • Unknown
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  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
    Moderation is key. You can have pizza with friends, just make it fit into your allotment.
  • lisalsd1
    lisalsd1 Posts: 1,519 Member
    "No, thanks." Then if someone is persistent...which has happened to me (for whatever bizarre motives on the other person's part). Say, "yes, the pizza looks delicious. That's why I am not going to eat it. It is a trigger food for me. I am a food addict." The pushiness will usually stop then.
  • dragon_girl26
    dragon_girl26 Posts: 2,187 Member
    paperpudding wrote: »
    Avoiding dinners you can't track doesn't sound a good long term plan.

    My suggestion is to have a small piece of pizza and estimate calories by comparing to something similar on the data base.
    Likewise if going anywhere else, have a small portion and estimate calories.

    And/ or take some low calorie food of your own to share.

    A lifestyle change has to fit into real life and that includes socialising.
    ^^this.
    Avoiding social gatherings just because there is food is kind of missing the point. in order to be successful with maintenance and weight loss long term, we have to learn how to have a healthy relationship with food and eat it in moderation. I find that planning ahead works really well. If I know what's there, I can plan my day/week around having a slice or two, and you can always bring lower calorie snacks with you! Go, enjoy yourself, and don't miss out on a good time with your friends! That's really what it's all about anyway. :-)
  • 85Cardinals
    85Cardinals Posts: 733 Member
    When you're in a social situation, just remember CICO!
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    My plate is smaller at a buffet. I get myself a drink (even if it is water) and nurse that along. A guest with empty hands will be fussed over by the host so I forestall that.
  • dragon_girl26
    dragon_girl26 Posts: 2,187 Member
    I would also add that I don't know where you live, but here in the Midwest there are a LOT of delicious things in season right now, like peaches, a few apples, various vegetables... generally, if someone brings in a peck of fresh local peaches to the office to share with everyone, people are usually all in on it. I bet if you had that, or a huge salad with all kinds of fresh delicious looking vegetables in it to share with everyone, you might have similar results. :-)
  • chloeelizabethm
    chloeelizabethm Posts: 184 Member
    Food envy! I get food envy all the time! Just have what they have, but less of it. And track what you can. Ask for the packaging if at a friend's or what was in it if it's homemade and judge as best you can.
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
    I had to be rude the other day when someone dropped 3 dozen donuts on my desk at work. I don't care.

    I'm going to echo other suggestions for eating a small portion or bringing something healthy (and still delicious) along to share. People generally love it.
  • WinoGelato
    WinoGelato Posts: 13,454 Member
    paperpudding wrote: »
    Avoiding dinners you can't track doesn't sound a good long term plan.

    My suggestion is to have a small piece of pizza and estimate calories by comparing to something similar on the data base.
    Likewise if going anywhere else, have a small portion and estimate calories.

    And/ or take some low calorie food of your own to share.

    A lifestyle change has to fit into real life and that includes socialising.

    ^This.
  • PinkDeerBoy
    PinkDeerBoy Posts: 89 Member
    You can't just avoid all social gatherings for the rest of your life because there may be food. Learn to eat whatever is being served in moderation, or bring your own dish to pass that better fits into your eating goals. We're always the one in the family bringing the veggie tray now, it seems.
  • kailyw05
    kailyw05 Posts: 80 Member
    I really hate being the one to say, "I can't eat that because I'm trying to lose weight." I find people immediately look down at my body and either think something positive or negative. Either way I don't like drawing attention to it.

    I also really love pizza and social eating. I eat well at work and at home, so I plan ahead to let the snacks/meal fit into my calories. And if they don't fit, I make up for it in the days following. It's not something that happens often enough that it would make me gain weight. If it slows my weight loss for 1 week, so be it.

    When I start saying no to something I really truly want, I start to feel unhappy with the process and find eventually I just say "screw it" and binge. I want to continue this journey for the rest of my life. Eliminating social eating is not something I am willing to ever do.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    Just have less. I've had to eat pizza too because I was hungry and there was nothing else, but I just had two slices (600 calories is actually less than what I try to set aside when eating out anyway). I did say no when it was loaded with toppings I don't like though, and just ate when I got home.

    Last night we went to my brother in law and it was a hungry day and I had already eaten my maintenance calories, so I just had a small piece of cheese, half a sandwich and some veggies and passed on dessert/corn etc.. maybe 400 calories worth? Nobody cared.
  • thereshegoesagain
    thereshegoesagain Posts: 1,056 Member
    I eat something filling before I go so that I'm not as tempted to stuff my face when tempting items are offered. And bring something healthy that you enjoy so that you don't feel deprived.
  • kat_princess12
    kat_princess12 Posts: 109 Member
    When one is asked over for dinner, and one accepts, and then refuses to eat what is served, that is rude and ungracious. But you are already asking how to handle these situations, so I'm assuming you also recognize this.

    In addition to the excellent suggestions already offered, build yourself a repertoire of gracious phrases that essentially mean "No". "Oh, I couldn't possibly eat another bite!" "Oh, Ethel, I've had so much pizza already I'm afraid I'll simply burst!" And if they become insistent, redirect: "But perhaps I could have just another bite or two of this delicious salad!"
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    Maybe try to fill up on vegetables before, and enjoy a piece of pizza or two while you're there. Or go for a run that morning. Pizza isn't forbidden. Just fit it into your calories.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    abigailjoywiebe wrote: »
    I'm a social eater. If someone else is eating, I want to eat with them. I've finally gotten past the point of having to eat with them, but when friends invite me over for dinner and they serve pizza, I have a really hard time saying no and/or don't know how to tell them I'm trying to watch what I eat without being rude. Any tips?


    Eat some pizza. I can fit 1-2 slices into my calorie goal comfortably. Pair it with a salad if you need more food.
    Bring something to share like a salad or vegetable dish that you can fill your plate and take a smaller portion of the main dish.
    Eat slowly. Drink a full glass of water during your meal.
    If you are invited over for dinner and you know about it all day then maybe have a lighter lunch.
  • galgenstrick
    galgenstrick Posts: 2,086 Member
    I don't go out very much, but social eating is that magical time when I just eat and drink whatever I want and people are envious that I can be lean and eat tons of comfort foods (they get the impression that I do that all the time), they just don't realize I am strict with my diet and workout every day of the week on normal days.
  • tekkiechikk
    tekkiechikk Posts: 375 Member
    I watched my brother's fiancee (who has never struggled with her weight) eat at a recent family function: she eats anything but takes small portions and then takes a bite and puts down the food or fork and waits at least a minute before eating again. Compared to me, the wolverine, who devours whatever is in front of me without pause. Well, it's much better than it was 5 months ago, but you get the idea. 'Mindful eating' is the term I've come across to describe this behavior, and I like it.

    So take a slice of pizza but pace yourself and be mindful of what you are eating. Fill up on conversation rather than food.
  • nordlead2005
    nordlead2005 Posts: 1,303 Member
    I go over and eat and bring my appetite. I also know when I'll be socially eating and go light for lunch knowing I'll eat more later. I only socially eat a few times a week tops and I just keep the portions reasonable. While I may not be able to track everything perfectly, I can track them pretty close. If I know I went way over despite eating a light lunch, I either accept it, or go a little light the next day too.

    The last time I went out we had Cheeseburgers, pasta salad, this cucumber salad thing, and collard greens. I snacked on a few chips and dip, and finished it off with blueberry crumb pie (1 slice) and vanilla ice cream (1 scoop).

    There were only two things in that meal that I couldn't accurately track at all. The cucumber salad and the chips. Both of them could have been easily avoided if I wanted too, or I even could have counted the chips, but I didn't.
  • pineapple_pizza
    pineapple_pizza Posts: 34 Member
    HealthyVitamins wrote: »
    Personally, and if its close friends, I usually ask them what food we are going to be having that night, if its something I don't want to eat like pizza, they are good enough friends for me to feel comfortable by telling them I'll pass.

    If they aren't close friends, and I don't know they are giving me food until I get there, I tell them politely I have already eaten.

    Sorry, if they are offended because I don't want to eat their food then they aren't worth hanging around with :)

    Second this. You are making changes for health and good friends will support this. :) If you do eat, just fit it into your calories!
  • rachelbouc
    rachelbouc Posts: 65 Member
    Marry the suggestions of eating a little with bringing something you made. This way you can indulge a little without being deprived. So what if you go over? One extra indulgent will not derail your success. Hiding from social gatherings will not help.
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