Men, Women, and Showering :)

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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry
hamper according to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you
see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make
mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg
cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo
with 43 added vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner
en hanced.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for
10
minutes until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa
cake
body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair
in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel
on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up
any exposed areas.


HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed
and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her
making the woo-woo sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the
size of your wiener and scratch your *kitten*.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in yo u r hands and let the water rinse
them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and
surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck
on
the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was
hanging out of tub the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and
fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass
wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the
woo-woo sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Replies

  • His_Kelly
    His_Kelly Posts: 248
    Options
    HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
    Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry
    hamper according to lights and darks.
    Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you
    see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

    Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make
    mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

    Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg
    cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

    Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo
    with 43 added vitamins.
    Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

    Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner
    en hanced.

    Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for
    10
    minutes until red.
    Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa
    cake
    body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair.

    Shave armpits and legs.

    Turn off shower.
    Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
    Spray mold spots with Tilex.

    Get out of shower.

    Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair
    in super absorbent towel.

    Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel
    on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up
    any exposed areas.


    HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
    Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed
    and leave them in a pile.

    Walk naked to the bathroom.

    If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her
    making the woo-woo sound.

    Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the
    size of your wiener and scratch your *kitten*.

    Get in the shower.

    Wash your face.

    Wash your armpits.

    Blow your nose in yo u r hands and let the water rinse
    them off.

    Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

    Spend majority of time washing privates and
    surrounding area.

    Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck
    on
    the soap.

    Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

    Pee.

    Rinse off and get out of shower.

    Partially dry off.

    Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was
    hanging out of tub the whole time.

    Admire wiener size in mirror again.

    Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and
    fan on.

    Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass
    wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the
    woo-woo sound again.

    Throw wet towel on bed.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Families_R_Forever
    Options
    lol:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: This is so true.
  • Erica92627
    Options
    have you been spying on my husband and I ? lol
  • cottrell22
    Options
    That's awesome and so true!! :laugh:
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
    Options
    :laugh: Oh that is so hilarious!!! Thanks for a good laugh first thing in the morning. :laugh:
  • lapach
    lapach Posts: 30
    Options
    OHHHHH that was to good! I needed a laugh today!!! :laugh:
  • jesusgrl14
    Options
    HILARIOUS! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: