Newly Widowed

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59newGIRL19
59newGIRL19 Posts: 11 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Hi, Everyone--my name is Carolyn and I am in my 50's. I have struggled on and off with my weight my whole life. The last 5 years have been particularly hard. Almost 3 months ago I lost my beloved husband. He had a chronic neurologic problem that rapidly deteriorated the last 5 years, so I was his caregiver. I wouldn't have let anyone else do it, but the stress took its toll. I am definitely an emotional eater and had ballooned up to 256#. Last summer, I started tracking with MFP and it really helped--I lost 52# and felt really on my way to good health. Unfortunately last October, my husband took a turn for the worse and I forgot about taking care of myself. I have unfortunately regained 30 of those hard fought pounds I lost. I'm sad, but not depressed and I am ready to take care of me. Logging everything really helps. I wonder if anyone else suffering loss has some tips or support they could offer. Thanks so much!

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  • amelialoveshersnacks
    amelialoveshersnacks Posts: 205 Member
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    Sorry for your loss Carolyn. I hope you do take care of yourself in these early days and the long days to come.
    I don't have any tips, as its taken me a few years to be ok with my grief.
    One day at a time (hugs)
  • LeslieB042812
    LeslieB042812 Posts: 1,799 Member
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    I'm so sorry for your loss, Carolyn......I don't have any advice/tips on dealing with loss, but just wanted to send over my encouragement.
  • 59newGIRL19
    59newGIRL19 Posts: 11 Member
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    Thank you both so much! One day at a time is about how it's going. Sometimes, one meal at a time! I stuck to my plan so far today (and that's an accomplishment!)
  • LeslieB042812
    LeslieB042812 Posts: 1,799 Member
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    pearlygirl135 wrote: »
    Thank you both so much! One day at a time is about how it's going. Sometimes, one meal at a time! I stuck to my plan so far today (and that's an accomplishment!)

    I think that's the best way to do it--one meal at a time and log everything. You'll get there, slowly but surely! :smile: Good job sticking to your plan today!
  • JohnGregory53
    JohnGregory53 Posts: 22 Member
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    Very sorry for your loss. I am in 50's as well. Feel free to add me.
  • ms_smartypants
    ms_smartypants Posts: 8,278 Member
    edited August 2015
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    I loss 4 people in 3 months this year ....I was in a bad funk ....I was still on here talking to friends but not logging my food ....One day I said to myself these 4 people wouldn't want me to give up on my self so I somehow got out of my funk starting logging my food again and working out ...Sorry for your loss ..You are more than welcome to add me ...wishing you much success
  • 50andfabu
    50andfabu Posts: 112 Member
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    So sorry for your loss. I wish you success in all you do! As for weight loss, there's lots of support here.
  • JustMissTracy
    JustMissTracy Posts: 6,338 Member
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    My heart feels for you...I have no advice, just my deepest condolences, and all the encouragement I can give...You CAN do this, and you ARE doing this! xo
  • amelialoveshersnacks
    amelialoveshersnacks Posts: 205 Member
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    pearlygirl135 wrote: »
    Thank you both so much! One day at a time is about how it's going. Sometimes, one meal at a time! I stuck to my plan so far today (and that's an accomplishment!)

    Good stuff! Sometimes it's hard to get the balance right on being gentle with yourself and pushing yourself to adapt to a very different way of living. Add me as a friend, if you like. It's always good to have a cheering squad
  • PinkPixiexox
    PinkPixiexox Posts: 4,142 Member
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    Pearlygirl, First of all - I am so sorry for your loss. Bless your heart. What a wonderful woman you are and what a lucky man your husband was to have someone like you making his last days comfortable. Massive amounts of respect to you. Please don't beat yourself up about putting on this weight. Some things are far more important than a few extra pounds - life happens and you find that there is more to it than counting every morsel that goes in to your mouth.

    I lost my nana last year - we were a very close family so it hit me quite hard and I stopped going to gym and ate whatever I felt like at the time. I put on 20lbs and was angry at myself but quickly forgave myself. I have lost the weight gained through exercise and making better food choices - logging really was the one thing that helped me lose those pounds, it's amazing what it all adds up to, isnt it?

    As you said, it's time to look after you. You deserve this. I wish you all the luck and happiness.
  • 59newGIRL19
    59newGIRL19 Posts: 11 Member
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    Gosh, thank you everybody! I have never really reached out for help before on these message boards. I thought my little problems/comments were of no interest to anyone. All your posts have really touched me and I feel like I can really carry on with my journey to health and a new life. Thank you!
  • EttaWB
    EttaWB Posts: 201 Member
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    My condolences. Be encouraged and know that you can do it again.
  • NicoleMartinelli8
    NicoleMartinelli8 Posts: 51 Member
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    I'm sorry for your loss. I'm here to help if u need a friend!
  • peggykirkby
    peggykirkby Posts: 27 Member
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    My strongest sympathy for you. Having been widowed twice, I understand how it can affect you. With my second widowhood, I threw myself into work, the only predictable thing in my life.

    From 2000-2010, I lost 12 family members and close friends. I too, looked at myself last year and decided that no one I'd lost would want a reunion due to my giving up.

    I'm in no community on MFP, but reading about others who are striving to get healthy...and why...really helps.

    I'd wish you all the luck in the world, but I don't think you'll need it. You're going to stay strong and everyone here will support you.

    You're going to be fine

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