A bit of a gripe, and want opinions...

monkeefun
monkeefun Posts: 271 Member
edited September 2024 in Chit-Chat
Last night was our local Relay for Life. I absolutely love Relay for Life, it's a wonderful cause, and yes, it's a very long night, but it's so worth it (for those who don't know, it's an overnight event held each year to raise money for cancer research - the idea being since cancer never sleeps, we stay up all night too. It's a really moving and memorable event!). This year, I am in LPN school, and as part of our graduation requirement, we have to each get in 10 hours of community service before graduation. A bunch of the girls I am in school with formed a team several weeks ago (at the last possible time to register a team) for the event purely to get in their hours for community service. I've been on a team since last years' event, and the whole time they were there last night they kept teasing me calling me traitor, because I did not skip over and join the LPN students' team. That was fine, and I played along with it, but what I don't like is that they literally stayed as long as they absolutely needed to. 10:30 or 11 or so at night, they all just packed up left, going back and forth about whether or not they all got in enough hours.

To ME, this seemed really disrespectful. It almost seemed especially nasty to me, since a few posted on Facebook about how they were doing a great thing. Not to mention, as nursing students, it seems like they would have a higher regard for the event, and would be more into it. Instead, they literally did the bare minimum necessary, and ran off as quickly as they could, and were really quite vocal about it. It almost seems like a slap in the face to the people who first hand dealt with cancer and what it does to people. Granted, I may be more sensitive because my family HAS been affected by cancer, and I get that this sort of thing isn't for everyone, but I was honestly REALLY disappointed with it. It honestly seemed like they just didn't care at all. Did what they had to do, and ran away as soon as they could. My question is am I wrong for feeling disappointed in this? Just seemed really disrespectful to me. :(

Replies

  • ace175
    ace175 Posts: 518 Member
    I totally understand where you're coming from....I too would have felt really crappy if I knew some people who did what they were doing, especially since it's such an important cause (I love relay for life!)
  • Hernandezedw
    Hernandezedw Posts: 284
    I honestly don't think I'd count that as community service.
  • Xaspar
    Xaspar Posts: 726 Member
    I too would be angry and disappointed about their behavior and they should have been more than a little embarrassed by their obvious disrespect. I used to organize a Relay for Life team every year for a local organization I was a member of. I truly enjoyed the time I spent walking with the survivors, and those supporting the cause. Our team was usually there helping to set up and helping to tear down. We sold refreshments (like ice cream and snow cones) throughout the night and any additional funds raised were also donated to the charity (on top of the pledges and illuminaries we had).
    Thank you for taking the time out to truly enjoy the spirit of the event and embracing the opportunity to help.
  • AndyAt160lbs
    AndyAt160lbs Posts: 44 Member
    Your right the only reason they did it was for the requirement and had little care for the cause.
  • ChRiStA_1983
    ChRiStA_1983 Posts: 380 Member
    I don't quite understand how it's "community service" to walk in the Relay for Life? Unless those girls were pledged for the ten hours that they walked, and they walked during the entire ten, how is it a benefit to ANYONE that they were there? Did they sell anything while there? Did they clean up the track/yard that it was being held on? Did they help set up tents?

    If not, how is that community service/volunteering? Maybe I'm wrong, but that's just my opinion!

    Good for you for being there for the right reasons! I completely understand your gripe, and I wholly agree with you!
  • kaw811
    kaw811 Posts: 19 Member
    It just shows how much more sensitive and considerate you are.... And I want to say thank you to you. My hubby has stage 4 colon cancer and quite frankly, unless you deal with cancer personally it's hard for someone to really "get it". Life has a way of teaching us these things though as time goes on so just try to see it that way. That they just haven't grown in this area yet. Many will in time...others may not. Some life lessons are hard to come by.

    Again. Thanks for what YOU are doing. Don't worry about the others. Sounds like you are right on track though. :-)
  • Tzavush
    Tzavush Posts: 389 Member
    As a Nurse myself, I think I would question their motivations for becoming nurses if "its too much of a hassle" to commit to putting genuine and empathetic compassion into an event of this nature.
    If they can't commit wholeheartedly to an event that will benefit thousands, how can they commit entirely to caring for one patient.
    I think it s entirely understandable to be ticked off.
    If I were in your position I would probably be writing a note to the dean of nursing studies outlining your concerns and their behaviours.
    (Hope that doesn't sound too vindictive, but are those the type of nurses you would want caring for you? A nurse who only committed half-way - the one who only did the bare minimum for the task instead of looking at you as a whole person in need of compassin and care?)
  • tsmom1128
    tsmom1128 Posts: 151 Member
    As someone whose life has been affected by cancer, i would have to say that I too am offended. I don't think that they should get their 10 hours of service.

    I am sorry that you had to be put in that type of situation. I hope you were still able to enjoy the rest of your night.
  • Solomonre0
    Solomonre0 Posts: 143 Member
    I completely understand where you're coming from. Some people just care more about others, have better manners, and do the considerate thing. We then get disappointed when others don't also take that same route. Just remember that somewhere down the road you will get your reward for your behavior, and they will get their own reward in some, way, shape or form. :)

    I <3 Karma.
  • monkeefun
    monkeefun Posts: 271 Member
    I don't quite understand how it's "community service" to walk in the Relay for Life? Unless those girls were pledged for the ten hours that they walked, and they walked during the entire ten, how is it a benefit to ANYONE that they were there? Did they sell anything while there? Did they clean up the track/yard that it was being held on? Did they help set up tents?

    If not, how is that community service/volunteering? Maybe I'm wrong, but that's just my opinion!

    Good for you for being there for the right reasons! I completely understand your gripe, and I wholly agree with you!


    If anything, they sold a couple of the luminarias, but they set a little tent while they were there, but tore it down right before they left 3 hours in the event.

    As someone whose life has been affected by cancer, i would have to say that I too am offended. I don't think that they should get their 10 hours of service.

    I am sorry that you had to be put in that type of situation. I hope you were still able to enjoy the rest of your night.

    The plus side is they aren't getting 10 hours worth - just whatever they don't have yet. Most only had a couple hours left (at least, I think they did - I'm really hoping no one tried getting even more than what they actually were there for).

    Thank you, everyone, for your responses. Overall, through the whole school process I feel like I am just disappointed a lot by the same people for this sort of attitude. This is in particular ticked me off. I didn't know if it's because I hold myself (and by extension everyone else) to a higher standard, or if it's just nothing that I'm blowing out of proportion. I definitely feel like it's an issue though :(. My brother says it's bad karma, and it'll be back around for them someday. Sigh. :(
  • UpToAnyCool
    UpToAnyCool Posts: 1,673
    :flowerforyou: You know what - you did a great thing for a great cause! Hat's off and thank you very, very much! (I mean this most sincerely, as cancer has also affected my family...)

    YES it sounds sort of disrepectful - the way some of the others partook in the event to fulfill some community service requirement by doing the bare minimum and then were totally tooting their own horns...

    I know you're FULLY justified to feel the way you feel, but why let them bother you and dilute your experience? This should be a great moment for you and you should be proud of yourself and your accomplishments.
    What I mean is, you know what your motivations are and why you participated in the event. Just be glad you aren't THEM. :laugh:
  • Jill_newimprovedversion
    Jill_newimprovedversion Posts: 988 Member
    I understand your gripe- and frustration. THIS is what separates you from many others in the nursing field. This is about compassion and individuals, not the glory- pat on the back for a deed "well done'. They'll rack up their community service points...big hairy deal for them...and they've received their reward ( let's all say "whoopie")

    Push past it and realize you'll come across this over and over and over again in this field. People can spot glory seekers a mile away. Keep serving in love and humility...you will be blessed because of it, trust me.
    And THANK YOU for being a part of the Relay For Life. Just lost a stepmother to colon cancer and want to find ways to support those who are still fighting the battle- and winning. A reminder to me get involved- and make sure I'm doing it with the RIGHT attitude-not for my own glory. Thanks for the prompt to do it now.
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