What has this weight loss cost you?

Soopatt
Soopatt Posts: 563 Member
edited November 23 in Motivation and Support
I had a therapist tell me once that our language around weight loss can hold us back, because no one likes to "lose" things. You lose your grandmother. You lose your car keys. Loss implies that it cost you something and we don't like loss and cost. We like abundance. We like to gain wealth health and happiness. We like more of the good things in life so when we "gain" weight, that is a more positive word and on some level we receive it that way. She advocated changing our language from "I am losing weight" to "I am gaining health", to switch things around. That was her theory, anyway. I always thought it was interesting.

I don't know that I need to stop using words which imply loss and cost, I think perhaps I just need to become comfortable with those words and what they really imply, to take the sting out of them in the same way that minorities take control and celebrate the words that were previously used to insult and belittle them.

With that in mind, and as a fun motivational exercise, I started thinking about the losses and costs incurred in this process and how I feel about them.

This weight loss has cost me:

3 pairs of shoes so far and probably a few more before I am done. Who knew that losing weight would make me go down a shoe size? Heels with space at the back look ridiculous so I have given them away.

Underwear. I though underwear was supposed to be stretchy! If I didn't have jeans on today, this pair would be around my ankles. Off to the store.. again.

Weight loss has come at a cost as far as my social routine is concerned. I don't want to go on long boozy lunches or to celebrate with mountains of food. I used to enjoy those things. It has cost me a few friends perhaps.

What I have lost:

The feeling of being invisible, which was sometimes a safe space to be.

9kg and counting. I am just over half way to my goal.

I want to be ok with loss and cost in this process and I want to always keep being realistic about the downside of getting thinner.

What are your losses and costs?

Replies

  • SwissMatterhorn
    SwissMatterhorn Posts: 12 Member
    Interesting take on the power of words. I haven't yet assessed my losses or costs but I thought I'd share something I read and triggered a 'light bulb' moment:
    "Fit is not a destination, fit is a way of life"
    So every night I look back at my day and ask myself: 'did i live fit today?' I look at exercise and food intake.
    Cheers
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,698 Member
    20 kg down in 7 months, and I've lost almost half a closet full of clothes.

    In fact, when I started this process, I was hoping to be able to wear this and that again as I lost weight ... but I completely overshot an entire range of clothes before I had time to wear any of it.

    Even today ... I had dug up a bunch of "small" clothes from the basement about 2 months ago, tried them all on and thought they'd be good. But today I was looking for a nice pair of black pants to wear tomorrow ... and most of them were way too big! I think I've got a choice of 2 pair that might work.

    Unfortunately, about 6 years ago, I got rid of all my really small clothes because I figured I'd never fit in them again. Now I could use them!! :grin:

    And it is going to start costing me money because soon I won't have anything to wear. But that's kind of fun too. :)


    It is also costing me a bit of freedom. Now I think about everything I eat. Not that that's a bad thing ... but some days I kind of miss the freedom.
  • ThatKirstyGirl123
    ThatKirstyGirl123 Posts: 9 Member
    After losing 87lbs, I have gained so much. But, I think for me the most important loss is a scapegoat.

    When I was bigger, I didn't like myself and didn't love myself, but I always blamed my weight. I always thought that if I lost weight, I'd be happy. But that's not the case... at least not for me. I'm a uk size 6 and still not happy, but now I have this hopelessness from not having something to blame.
  • Lynzdee18
    Lynzdee18 Posts: 500 Member
    I gave away a lot of clothes, bigger AND smaller, last year. I was just sick of looking at them. This spring I was sad thatI had given away the bigger clothes - had a bad winter of stress eating. The end of July, I was sick of having nothing to wear. Sick of my image in the mirror.

    Now, six weeks later, I am scouring my closet looking for clothes that don't swim on me. Which problem would I rather have? THIS one!

    Yes, I do have to really plan meals better- one style for me, another for my husband, but thankfully he's good with leftovers as am I, so we can eat different menus and live happily together!

    I think I am gaining much more as I lose! :)
  • maggiemay530
    maggiemay530 Posts: 123 Member
    Lynzdee18 wrote: »
    I gave away a lot of clothes, bigger AND smaller, last year. I was just sick of looking at them. This spring I was sad thatI had given away the bigger clothes - had a bad winter of stress eating. The end of July, I was sick of having nothing to wear. Sick of my image in the mirror.

    Now, six weeks later, I am scouring my closet looking for clothes that don't swim on me. Which problem would I rather have? THIS one!

    Yes, I do have to really plan meals better- one style for me, another for my husband, but thankfully he's good with leftovers as am I, so we can eat different menus and live happily together!

    I think I am gaining much more as I lose! :)

    This..."Gaining as I lose" It's like cleaning a cluttered house. Getting rid of the old, broken, and useless. Replacing that which is needed with fresh new things that work properly and look nice. I guess when talking about excess weight, Loss is Gain!
  • Morgaen73
    Morgaen73 Posts: 2,817 Member
    I'm 52kg down and I've pretty much replaced my whole closet and most of my "new" clothes are too big as well so I will probably have to replace them when I'm at goal as well.

    Cant say it has cost me more than that lol My solution with shoes is thicker sockes lol Yes, men can get away with that :P
  • jonsmithkidd
    jonsmithkidd Posts: 1,204 Member
    I have lost a closer relationship with my parents, who didn't want me to lose weight/get fit

    I've lost lots of pairs of jeans and shirts

    I've lost the excuse of blaming my weight on being bad at sports

    I've lost the reliance on food as emotional support
  • SweetPeasMom55
    SweetPeasMom55 Posts: 3,567 Member
    When I lost 20 lbs I literally packed up all my fat clothes and gave them away. Everyone at work said don't do it you need to box them just in case. No safety net just moving forward I'm finding myself. I like what I see it's time to move on and not look back. Got a ways to go but I'm happy to take the challenge and when the pants get soooo roomy that they fall off I'll invest in a few more in a smaller size. B)
  • cgvoabc
    cgvoabc Posts: 18 Member
    I've lost track of how much money I've lost in buying new clothes as I lost weight.
  • Soopatt
    Soopatt Posts: 563 Member
    Quite a few mentions of losing the scape-goat, when things are not perfect in your life, I can totally relate to that.

    I had decided that I was getting overlooked at work because I had put on weight and it has turned out not to be true. I have been overlooked because as I gained I became less assertive and did not stand up and be counted when it mattered. It was difficult to face that.

    I also agree with the comment about freedom. I go out for dinner less often because I prefer to eat at home, controlling the environment.

    Here is a new one from me - I have lost realistic perspective on what big and small sizes are! I had convinced myself that a particular dress was tiny and an unrealistic thing to wear for someone my age, until I lost some weight and put it on recently and was swimming it it. It was never a skinny persons dress, just a regular dress. I was kidding myself to make myself feel better at the time.
  • T1DCarnivoreRunner
    T1DCarnivoreRunner Posts: 11,502 Member
    I've lost my sanity at times, it seems. I've given up the ability to eat delicious foods (I know some users point out that I can eat it in smaller quantities, but that just doesn't satisfy me). I've given up health in the short term and had some emergency medical situations (I have medical issues that affect and are affected by weight loss).

    Long term, I hope to come out ahead from a health perspective (eventually). I hope to gain the ability to enjoy more outdoor activities. I hope to look and feel better.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    Cost of losing weight, being more active, being outside more- bug spray, sun screen, calamine lotion, Ivarest, more laundry, more showers, time spent exercising, time spent logging food and on forums, clothing/shoes
    Loss- pain, shortness of breath, being unable to keep up with my family, looking pregnant, being embarrased, loud snoring
  • rjmoore55
    rjmoore55 Posts: 1 Member
    I may be losing my mind over my weight loss. I'm now 65 yrs old, retired, single (so no one is sabotaging my efforts) and have been on-again, off-again with My Fitness Pal. I'm also losing my motivation because I JUST DON'T LOSE ANYTHING. I'll track the food religiously for several weeks, ride my bike (usually 20 miles a pop, 2-3 times weekly), swim (usually a mile 1-2 miles weekly) the tracker says I should weigh "162 in 5 weeks", but I don't lose and that promised weight never comes. Doctor is working on getting my thyroid right, but I just want to give up. Losing weight is really hard. My cost of losing weight - little to none, because I just don't lose. What am I missing?
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    Oh, yeah, can totally relate to the revolving closet. Losing weight has certainly lightened my wallet.

    I lost pain in my feet and joints.

    I "lost" blood pressure problems, cholesterol problems, and blood sugar control problems. I got to toss a lot of pills.

    I lost my fear of injury, and I have done things I hadn't tried in a very, very long time. Trampoline, skating, skiing, running, mud hero.
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,698 Member
    rjmoore55 wrote: »
    I may be losing my mind over my weight loss. I'm now 65 yrs old, retired, single (so no one is sabotaging my efforts) and have been on-again, off-again with My Fitness Pal. I'm also losing my motivation because I JUST DON'T LOSE ANYTHING. I'll track the food religiously for several weeks, ride my bike (usually 20 miles a pop, 2-3 times weekly), swim (usually a mile 1-2 miles weekly) the tracker says I should weigh "162 in 5 weeks", but I don't lose and that promised weight never comes. Doctor is working on getting my thyroid right, but I just want to give up. Losing weight is really hard. My cost of losing weight - little to none, because I just don't lose. What am I missing?

    How many calories are you consuming each day?

  • ilovesweeties
    ilovesweeties Posts: 84 Member
    I lost 72 lbs and it cost me my confidence in my body! Accepting myself as a whole, overweight person was not something I thought about, I just did it- I loved myself. In admitting there was a problem with my body, I opened a can of worms I didn't know existed.

    I *know* that I have added years to my life, increased my enjoyment of most activities; I am really proud of myself for the dedication I applied to weight loss. However, it's so easy to look at my still wobbling body and criticize. I'm trying/learning to see strength and experience instead of loose skin and wobbles and I will get there... it's just really surprised me that such a positive change has left me bereft of the confidence I formerly had.

    PS I know strength training will help, I am on it!
  • kristen6350
    kristen6350 Posts: 1,094 Member
    edited September 2015
    I lost the belief that diets, pills, shakes, workout plans, etc, are the way to lose weight. I know now, that if I need to lose a couple pounds I have to give up my beer and ice cream at night for a couple weeks, done.

    5 sizes of clothing - no more having 2-3 sizes smaller hidden away for "that day when I'm lighter". That day has come and it's gonna stick around. Definitely saves space!

    I've also lost a ton of excuses. Being tall doesn't mean I can weight more and get away with it. I'm not big boned. I have as many curves now as I did 50lbs ago. They are just smaller and tighter.

    I've also lost the ability to drink a ton of alcohol - 1-2 drinks and I'm good to go for an evening. Saves on calories!
  • Soopatt
    Soopatt Posts: 563 Member
    kristen6350 wrote: »
    I lost the belief that diets, pills, shakes, workout plans, etc, are the way to lose weight.

    ha ha.. yes.

    I feel like I used to believe in magic or something.

    It is quite disappointing to discover how long and boringly conventional the path to real weight loss is. There are so many people in my life who are not ready to give up that belief in magic and get hostile about it. I can get it as I was there once, but it is difficult to not roll my eyes when they explain their latest hair-brained scheme or give me *advice*.
  • T1DCarnivoreRunner
    T1DCarnivoreRunner Posts: 11,502 Member
    kristen6350 wrote: »
    I know now, that if I need to lose a couple pounds I have to give up my beer and ice cream at night for a couple weeks, done.

    I know I'm jealous of how easy some find it to lose weight, but damn... I had no idea it was THIS easy for some people. I gave up beer and ice cream (and cut back on pizza by about 95%), and that was only the tip of the iceberg to losing weight.
  • kristen6350
    kristen6350 Posts: 1,094 Member
    Soopatt wrote: »
    kristen6350 wrote: »
    I lost the belief that diets, pills, shakes, workout plans, etc, are the way to lose weight.

    ha ha.. yes.

    I feel like I used to believe in magic or something.

    It is quite disappointing to discover how long and boringly conventional the path to real weight loss is. There are so many people in my life who are not ready to give up that belief in magic and get hostile about it. I can get it as I was there once, but it is difficult to not roll my eyes when they explain their latest hair-brained scheme or give me *advice*.

    Just the words "Shakeology" & "Raspberry Ketones" & "Detox" give me the willies. And when you tell them they don't need to spend all the extra money on something they will do for a month and give up because it's too restrictive, they look at you like you are an alien.

  • kristen6350
    kristen6350 Posts: 1,094 Member
    midwesterner85 wrote: »
    kristen6350 wrote: »
    I know now, that if I need to lose a couple pounds I have to give up my beer and ice cream at night for a couple weeks, done.

    I know I'm jealous of how easy some find it to lose weight, but damn... I had no idea it was THIS easy for some people. I gave up beer and ice cream (and cut back on pizza by about 95%), and that was only the tip of the iceberg to losing weight.

    Ok, maybe this is a bit simplified. I know now that if I gain a few pounds, reducing my intake (CICO) for a couple weeks the weight will drop off. Which for me is usually "extras". I don't need to be "extremely" restrictive and skip meals and work out a ton. Simple changes that you don't think about can make the biggest of differences.


  • T1DCarnivoreRunner
    T1DCarnivoreRunner Posts: 11,502 Member
    kristen6350 wrote: »
    midwesterner85 wrote: »
    kristen6350 wrote: »
    I know now, that if I need to lose a couple pounds I have to give up my beer and ice cream at night for a couple weeks, done.

    I know I'm jealous of how easy some find it to lose weight, but damn... I had no idea it was THIS easy for some people. I gave up beer and ice cream (and cut back on pizza by about 95%), and that was only the tip of the iceberg to losing weight.

    Ok, maybe this is a bit simplified. I know now that if I gain a few pounds, reducing my intake (CICO) for a couple weeks the weight will drop off. Which for me is usually "extras". I don't need to be "extremely" restrictive and skip meals and work out a ton. Simple changes that you don't think about can make the biggest of differences.


    Alright, I'm not quite as jealous anymore.... I'm back to the typical level of jealousy that a simple CICO provides immediate and statistically significant results. I have to cut net carbs to less than 20g daily and eat at around 1,000-1,200 kcal daily to see the results you are describing. Even then, I know it is mostly glycogen and water weight. :(
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