Disgusted at myself and the full length pic I saw!

I seriously think that my mind is warped! I know I'm big but until I see a picture of myself in full view I don't realize just how big I am! I step on the scale and I know it's bad but I always shrug it off and think we'll I will fix it but I never do... But I don't feel as big as I look if that makes sense. The only time I do feel the effect that all this weight has on me is when I try to do a 5k and think I can keep up with everyone and then I find my self at the very end of the race thinking wow I didn't think I would be dead last! But my mind is truly warped! I have even been diagnosed with a disease that is due in most part to me being obese! And yet I still stuff my face with unnecessary evils that satisfy only for the moment and leave me in tears later wondering why I do that in the first place! Why do I have to love the taste of food so much that I cannot control what I eat, what I crave, what I look like! Why do I have to let food run my life! I a so damn sick of it and yet days go by and here I am this blob of fat at the age of 31 who dislikes herself and envies the people who have the mind to get up and work on their beautiful bodies everyday! People who used to be fat always say well something just snapped and I just did it! I am hoping that seeing the awful pictures that I saw of myself do it for me! And the fear of my disease creeping back up me too! But when is enough, enough! I hope that I can overcome before it is too late!

Replies

  • omatga
    omatga Posts: 56 Member
    Maybe seeing that is exactly what you needed to "snap out of it" as you said. I know for me, it was seeing an old picture of myself against a recent one (back when I just started my fit journey). The mental part plays such a HUGE part of being ready to really make a chance and really do what is required to get it done. I compare it to quitting smoking. YOU have to be mentally prepared ready to do it, no matter what, even when you don't feel like it. I hope this was your changing moment!! You totally hold all the power and YOU can make it happen for yourself. No one else can, but you! <3
  • KetoRich
    KetoRich Posts: 2 Member
    edited September 2015
    I find having a STRONG WHY you WANT to and NEED to lose weight focuses more on the Positive Side and Reinforces Your Will Power.

    Your STRONG WHY can be the negative pictures but don't think negatively about them. Being depressed weakens you and leaves you little power to be motivated to do anything.

    Every morning when you wake up repeat in the mirror out load Your STRONG WHY You ARE Going to Lose Weight. Outloud Tell Yourself What Weight You See Yourself and the Dress Size You ARE (the size you want to be). You Mind Only Knows the Truth You Tell It and It Will Believe It!

    In the beginning this seems silly and your brain will tell you it's a lie but you Tell It The Truth!! I am today a size # dress and I feel AMAZING & BEA-U-TI-FUL! I am the person I see myself as! I am ...! - I Did It YAYYYY!!!

    When you do this your WHY becomes Extremely STRONG and YOU WILL Be able to do it!!

    Facebook.com/RichKatCafe
  • melduf
    melduf Posts: 468 Member
    You need a "why" so strong that giving up is not an option. One day, the weather was perfect and my 10 month old daughter asked me to open the tv instead of asking to go outside. I decided she wouldn't be fat because of the example I set. So I started running. It took a few months before I decided to get my nutrition in line too. Then later on I started working out 5-6 days a week.

    It's not easy. I have lapses. Reaching for support really helped with the binge eating. Thinking of my daughter and the struggles I'm saving her is worth forgoing that second helping or that pop corn bag at night while watching tv.

    So here's my advice: ask yourself why you want this. Dig deep. Then set a big scary goal and smaller goals that you can celebrate along the way with non-food rewards, like new clothes, jewelry, spa day, vacation and so on depending on your budget. Then make a plan. You need a workout program (either at the gym, at home or a running app) and a nutrition plan (calorie intake, balanced macros, avoid or limit your trigger foods, etc.). And finally find support that you can fall back on when you're struggling.

    Good luck!
  • KetoRich
    KetoRich Posts: 2 Member
    @Tiffybaby31 lets do this!! What Is Your STRONG WHY? Dig Deep it may invoke tears and that's good, get them out and let's turn this positive — TODAY IS YOUR DAY! You Got This! What is YOUR WHY that means Giving Up as @melduf said is NOT An Option?

    Facebook.com/RichKatCafe
  • urloved33
    urloved33 Posts: 3,325 Member
    I seriously think that my mind is warped! I know I'm big but until I see a picture of myself in full view I don't realize just how big I am! I step on the scale and I know it's bad but I always shrug it off and think we'll I will fix it but I never do... But I don't feel as big as I look if that makes sense. The only time I do feel the effect that all this weight has on me is when I try to do a 5k and think I can keep up with everyone and then I find my self at the very end of the race thinking wow I didn't think I would be dead last! But my mind is truly warped! I have even been diagnosed with a disease that is due in most part to me being obese! And yet I still stuff my face with unnecessary evils that satisfy only for the moment and leave me in tears later wondering why I do that in the first place! Why do I have to love the taste of food so much that I cannot control what I eat, what I crave, what I look like! Why do I have to let food run my life! I a so damn sick of it and yet days go by and here I am this blob of fat at the age of 31 who dislikes herself and envies the people who have the mind to get up and work on their beautiful bodies everyday! People who used to be fat always say well something just snapped and I just did it! I am hoping that seeing the awful pictures that I saw of myself do it for me! And the fear of my disease creeping back up me too! But when is enough, enough! I hope that I can overcome before it is too late!

    a daily 1/2 hour walk will help you change your attitude towards yourself.

  • You aren't warped. I used to be a fit 125lbs. Even when the scale was almost twice that I never saw myself much different. I jokingly said I had reverse body dysmorphia.

    You shouldn't dislike yourself because of how you look though. The other posters comments about it being mental are totally correct. You can do it, you just need to allow yourself confidence in that belief. Do it really really slowly if you need to, but it can happen. Avoiding extremes is totally fine.

    Try for .5 week loss settings on sedentary activity, learn to meticulously weigh and track everything you take in and it will follow from there. You don't have to starve yourself to have success.
  • Nataliegetfit
    Nataliegetfit Posts: 395 Member
    You need to tell yourself you are worth it, if you have an illness associated with weight, you owe it to yourself to get better. It is in your control, do you want to feel good and look good. You just have to do it, and keep doing it, and continue doing it. Don't think in a week, I will see a change, make some real changes in your life, log your food, move more and in a month, see how you did, then do the same for each month. Good luck, you just need to change your mind set about it, and tell yourself you are strong, you are worth it.
  • Zombella
    Zombella Posts: 490 Member
    You need to find something to grab onto that will help you continue. I remember 4 years ago I didn't think that I was big but then on my birthday I went to the dmv to have my license renewed and I saw how big my face looked. I walked out and cried! I was so ashamed.

    Anyway, what really kicked my butt this time was my doctor telling me that I needed to eat less fats and lose weight. I've lost 30 pounds and for the past week I've been in a super funk. I took a few days away from calorie counting and I am ready to start again.

    Just take something, anything, even the thought that you may be a happier person when you lose weight and hold onto that. When you want to eat something, just think if it will make you a happier person momentarily OR a happier person for the long run (losing weight).