Recovering from Eat Disorder!

Hi! My name is Fallon and I have struggled with eating disorders for a year and a half. In May of 2014, I decided to lose weight- starting at 120 pounds at 5'2" I only wanted to loose 5 pounds. I started the south beach diet, cutting out major food groups and a few months later, I was 101 pounds. I became anorexic and obsessed with my looks. Everyone in my life became worried that I wasn't eating enough...I ignored everyone, even though under eating made me irritated and emotional .. Crazy enough, i still wasn't satisfied and wanted to reach 99 pounds! However, My body couldn't take the starvation anymore, so I started getting crazy food cravings and started binge eating. My reaction was to try to not eat for several day after binge eating, which only made the cravings worse. I started living a life I was not proud of and I hated what I became. Eventually, the binge eating had become worse than the starving, and I gained all my weight back to 120 over the spring and summer. I realized that happiness doesn't come just from looks or how skinny I am, and through the help of my friends and family, I have now passed over that horrible phase in my life! Today, I want to use this app to help me eat healthy and gain muscle! I want to be happy, healthy, strong and gain the muscle back that I have lost in the past year. It will be a long road but my motivation and happiness has recently returned and I will try very hard to become the person, both mentally and physically, I want to be!

Replies

  • Train4Foodz
    Train4Foodz Posts: 4,298 Member
    Hey there,
    Firstly welcome to the MyFitnessPal community, it sure sounds like you've been through more than your fair share of difficult times.

    It's fantastic that you're making such a positive change towards making your future brighter and eating disorder free. I'm absolutely positive that you'll find many others within this fantastic community that have been on similar paths to yourself (and those on different ones completely, sharing a common goal for a healthy lifestyle!) that will be there to cheer you on and offer advice if things get tough.

    Remember, this isn't always 'easy' but it's ALWAYS worth it!!

    You got this!!!!

    All the VERY best,
    Train4Foodz, MyFitnessPal Moderator
  • PinkPixiexox
    PinkPixiexox Posts: 4,142 Member
    I'm very glad to see that you are healthy and ready to make some fantastic, positive changes to your attitude and your lifestyle. You are a beautiful and unique person, no matter what number the scales shows - so please remember that. Being a part of MFP is a really fantastic step you've taken - there are so many amazing people who will always be willing to offer support and understanding. You should be proud of yourself, truly.
  • CurlyCockney
    CurlyCockney Posts: 1,394 Member
    Just me that's concerned that OP is trying to lose 18lb then?
  • FallonKathleen
    FallonKathleen Posts: 4 Member
    Just me that's concerned that OP is trying to lose 18lb then?

    No, my goal isn't to lose weight, it's to gain muscle
  • CurlyCockney
    CurlyCockney Posts: 1,394 Member
    The ticker on your profile says you want to lose 18lb. If you've put your stats in incorrectly, MFP won't be able to give you the correct calorie goal. I don't know much about exercising, but I believe you can't gain muscle in a deficit.
  • FallonKathleen
    FallonKathleen Posts: 4 Member
    The ticker on your profile says you want to lose 18lb. If you've put your stats in incorrectly, MFP won't be able to give you the correct calorie goal. I don't know much about exercising, but I believe you can't gain muscle in a deficit.

    Ooooh, I see, that is actually from when I had this app a year and a half ago. I forgot to change the calorie and weight setting O_o
  • CurlyCockney
    CurlyCockney Posts: 1,394 Member
    Ah that explains it! The good news is, you'll be able to eat more and reach your goal regarding muscles easier when you update your info. Best of luck!
  • FallonKathleen
    FallonKathleen Posts: 4 Member
    Ah that explains it! The good news is, you'll be able to eat more and reach your goal regarding muscles easier when you update your info. Best of luck!

    Thank you!
    Have a nice morning and best wishes with you as well :)
  • KHM_Fitness
    KHM_Fitness Posts: 15 Member
    Wish you all the best in your journey