Need motivation

Hello from the Netherlands!

I am an expat living in the Netherlands, 35 years old and looking for a job. I am 5'3 and 176 right now. Hard to put myself in a program. I have realised that people usually have a natural tendency to be good at something and find hard to show the slightest of discipline to something else. For example I am good at studying, I empathize people, I have a lot of patience, I am so and so at managing my finances.. but I find hard to loose weight.

I am very dissapointed of friends who say the common cliche "you do not want it enough". I do want it enough. But knowing my strengths and weeknesses I assure you that I find it hard. So hard that noone has the patience to understand me, the willingness to discuss about my cravings and offer real support. I am not the woman who forgets to eat or the woman who will feel full with an apple. I do not eat because I need comfort food. I eat because I do feel hungry. I do not like sweets at all. Though I like carbs and red meat.

I do not like gym, or dance, or swimming. From time to time I struggle to persuade myelf to go walking or jogging. Suffering from asthma it's not always easy here in the Netherlands. The weather is so bad and windy. Some times I find yoga videos for begginers but never managed to stick to them. Also tried to workout with friends. Though they are begginers (women) thay are already so better than me that we cannot synchronise.

I have a good social life and men flirt me enough. I like my chubby version and I am okey with my body. In my family we were never obsessed with how we look. We value high knowledge and cleverness. I guess family values are embedded to us and influence our lives. Personally, I am knowledgable about health and nutrtion issues. However I cannot apply my knowledge to practise. I do realise that it is bad for my health. Already suffering from high holesterol. And I realise that this can get worse in the future.

I do not eat because I need comfort food. I eat because I do feel hungry. I used to be 20 lbs heavier and lost them going at curves gym studio, eating a lot of lentils and beans, and writting my thesis. But at that point I had decided to be healthy to help myself proceed with the thesis process. I wanted a healthy body to be able to concentrate and perform well.

I wonder if there is anyone out there feeling the same. I have tried a facebook group at past but noone there needed motivation. They uploaded their healthy home cooked food and body photos showing their progress. This had no impact on me. I was neither motivated, nor frustrated, nor jealous. I did not find it engaging at all. I found it irrelevant and not engaging at all. Equally irrelevant with the cheesy quotes I see here and there. I also tried guided meditation to loose weight and it did not work either.

I wonder am I the only one facing these problems?

Am I the only one who wants to escape from the treadmill after 5 minutes? I am bored to death there! I suffer badly when I run no matter the music I listen to or whatever. I mean I feel so awfull there. That I cannot persuade myself to keep on no matter how hard I try.

Indeed, Carlee... So many times that it feels I am the only one.

Any motivation would be really appreciated.

Feel free to share your worries or tell me what would help you.. Maybe i can help.

Cheers!

Tina

I find at least 20 threads a day on here that someone has written something that motivates me. We're all on the same journey and I've read many posts similar to your two over the months and by skimming. There is a common theme of "just do it" because MFP is based on logging and staying in a deficit to lose weight. You do that by logging your food every day, whether you want to or not. If you read some of the many success stories you'll see the same thing over and over. They stayed committed to eating less for a long period of time, didn't starve themselves, and we're successful. You guys can do this too (and I don't get full from one apple either).