Discouraged

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I've lost 30 lbs. 30!!!! But you'd never know it :( I still look and feel enormous. I literally look the same. I have been working SO HARD and eating soo healthy.
I still need to lose 105lbs so I AM still extremely overweight... I just thought I'd see some small changes. I have such a long road and I'm so sad I let things get so out of hand.
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  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,575 Member
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    I'm sure you can see a difference! Have you taken pictures and measurements? Obviously 30 pounds on someone who is needing to lose 135, compared with someone who needs to lose 50, is not going to be the same. That's okay! You are well on your way my dear.
  • charlieandcarol
    charlieandcarol Posts: 302 Member
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    Did you take a before and after photo? Or some measurements? If not take some now and keep going. There absolutely will be changes but if you are like me, you find them hard to see in yourself. 30 pounds is a great effort!
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 24,944 Member
    edited September 2015
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    Yeah, the before and after photos can tell the tale.

    Many days I don't feel like I've lost much weight at all, I don't feel like anything has changed. Then yesterday I looked at some of my before photos and compared them with some photos taken on Saturday ............... and what a difference. I could hardly believe it.
  • sheldonklein
    sheldonklein Posts: 854 Member
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    You did not lose 30 lbs and look the same. You may not see the change, but the world does. The only thing that apparently hasn't changed is the 6 inches between you ears.
  • Tinawood40
    Tinawood40 Posts: 65 Member
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    Keep on keeping on. Think of how fast time flies. If you keep at it you will lose those pounds and you will be so happy you stuck with it. I've lost 22 pounds and saw NOTHING until about 20 and then suddenly I did. You may be right around the corner to notice a change.
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,464 Member
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    I've lost 105 lbs on my way to -150. There were definitely changes at 30 pounds, but I might not have noticed them if it weren't for having a before pic and 3 mo progress pics. If you haven't taken pics yet, start now! Also take measurements. Also check your clothes. After 30 lbs they should be looser and you prob need a smaller size of jeans.
  • Always_Smiling_D
    Always_Smiling_D Posts: 118 Member
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    baby steps, remember that gaining the weight didn't happen over night - 30 lbs lost is a cause of celebrating an achievement, means you are being proactive. take pics even if you don't like to, take measurements and continue doing what you are doing. Don't get too hung up in the number of pounds loss but in how you feel and continue giving it all you got...
  • iceicebebe
    iceicebebe Posts: 8 Member
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    I took measurements and I have lost some inches. Not all over though.. My bust waist and hips are going down a LEEEEETLE but my neck, arms thighs and calves are the same. I just took before pictures for the "bikini body mommy" challenge but I didn't take any when I actually started this process in July.
    My sweet husband says he can tell but I really feel like he's just saying that to encourage me :/ which is wonderful... I just wish I saw it or felt it. I'm so darn squishy and the shape of my body is SO WEIRD!! My postpartum belly is heinous.
  • pstegman888
    pstegman888 Posts: 286 Member
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    You've lost 22% of what you need to lose. That's tremendous progress! I set my sights on 10 pounds at a time; it helps to keep me from feeling overwhelmed by my end goal. Take some pics periodically, preferably in the same clothes each time. I'm sure you'll see a difference. .. and if you don't, post them on here & everybody else will tell you what you can't see. It takes a while for the brain to accept a visial difference. Above all, don't give up just when you're starting to make a significant difference! Hang in there & be GLAD you made some healthy changes in your life.
  • iceicebebe
    iceicebebe Posts: 8 Member
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    lorrpb wrote: »
    I've lost 105 lbs on my way to -150. There were definitely changes at 30 pounds, but I might not have noticed them if it weren't for having a before pic and 3 mo progress pics. If you haven't taken pics yet, start now! Also take measurements. Also check your clothes. After 30 lbs they should be looser and you prob need a smaller size of jeans.

    I have literally lived in yoga pants since my son was born. They feel the same.. Everything, in my mind, fits the same.. My breast size fluctuates because I'm nursing so sometimes I think oooh!! They're smaller!! And then an hour later I'm like... Oh. Nope.
  • iceicebebe
    iceicebebe Posts: 8 Member
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    I really needed these comments. My crazy hormonal self is totally crying. Thanks, everyone.
    I'm not stopping. No way. I just get sad when I look in the mirror or refuse to change in front of my husband. I make him leave the room and I lock the door when I shower :(
    I can't wait until I'm happy with what I see..and feel comfortable enough to be a normal wife who doesn't hide from her hubs.
  • lindsey1979
    lindsey1979 Posts: 2,395 Member
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    Also, you might want to find other ways to measure your success than how things look or clothes fit (or even numbers on the scale). I find that making improvements in my fitness really helps with that for me. So when my fat loss stalled, if I was hiking/walking more miles that week or increasing my lifts, I had something that was still easily quantifiable to show progress and I could celebrate.

    I think many of us go through a period, especially in the beginning, when we're somewhat embarrassed or discouraged by how we've allowed ourselves to have gained as much weight as we have -- have that moment when we go, "how did I let it get this bad?" That's okay. It's just a part of taking stock of our reality -- which is necessary if we want to change it. So just look at this discouragement as a natural part of the process and keep on plodding forward and taking encouragement from other successes.
  • Always_Smiling_D
    Always_Smiling_D Posts: 118 Member
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    Just remember that this is as much as a mental change as it is a lifestyle change, perhaps the mental is even more importan. You have to look at yourself in the mirror each morning and tell yourself you are beautiful just the way you are but that you are going to show yourslef the love and respect you deserve by taking good care of yourself and moving forward in becoming a healthier you. The more you practive positive affirmations the more it starts feeling like celebrating every oz loss, every helathier meal, every step you take... you have to start on the mind. If you tell yourself that you are hidious, then guess what - no one else can change your mind.
  • youdontknowwhatyousaw
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    It is very hard to see changes in yourself when looking in the mirror. W are so focused on the negative things, we don't see the positive. That being said, I started with about 115 pounds to lose and I didn't see a difference until sometime after 40 pounds, but, others did.

    Like someone else said, focus on performance instead of your looks. As your performance inproves, so, will your body. Inproved performance builds confidence which in turn will help you view your body in a more positive light.
  • 110challenge
    110challenge Posts: 195 Member
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    For the most part I'm having the same problem, but opposite... I can see the changes (I have lost 30 and want to lose 110 total) but my coworkers are just now saying things like "oh wow, I can really see it in your bust/face, I bet by Christmas it'll be noticeable!!!". Uhh..thanks guys..I thought it was noticeable now. LOL. My hubby just lost 50 lbs and even family members werent commenting until he was over the 40 lb lost mark.

    I think you're probably close to a really noticeable change!
  • HippySkoppy
    HippySkoppy Posts: 725 Member
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    Regardless of the incorrect messages your brain is sending you, your ARE making tremendous progress.

    It takes a long time for our minds to catch up mentally to the physical differences that come with weight loss.....sometimes too it is hard to spot those changes when you have quite an amount to lose overall but as another poster has pointed out you have lost 22% of your goal and that IS fantastic.

    You will lose weight often in weird areas and certainly there is often no ryhme or reason to where the weight goes from first......patience and persistence will get you there and keep you going.

    Don't lose heart Honey....you are doing great. I too had similar feelings of discouragement through my time of losing from 278 lbs down to 110 lbs....breaking it up into smaller goals and steps can help sort out the daunting task ahead and I totally agree that you should keep up with regular measuring and taking progress shots. I didn't till sometime after starting and I regret it.

    Keep up the good work. Congrats too.

    All the best.
  • Miss_Mania
    Miss_Mania Posts: 163 Member
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    At 30 lbs lost, I also looked the same. I was waiting for people's approval or some sort of acknowledgement but it never came until a lot further down the track. Instead of physical changes - I decided to focus on how I felt internally. I was a lot more healthier, I was more energetic and physically capable of doing things my former self only dreamt of. This was what fuelled my drive to continue. Weight loss journey is not an easy one and everyone will experience days when they just can't be f@#$ed. Consistency and balance is the key to success.
  • xX_PhoenixRising_Xx
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    I couldn't see much change when I'd lost 30lbs either. I took regular photos and I could only sometimes see the changes by comparing them side-by-side. I always saw changes in the photos before I saw them in the mirror though. My measurements also usually moved in fits and starts, it took ages for my clothing size to start moving downwards. I started at 329lbs, needing to lose half my body weight. I've lost over 150lbs and I can assure you that I can see the changes now! Just keep going, changes are happening even if you can't notice them yet.
  • Dustinsteven22
    Dustinsteven22 Posts: 280 Member
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    Frustration comes with unmet expectations. Like all of us, you see and read others success stories and build an expectation that your results will be the same in a short amount of time. The scale is not king. A true test of change is body fat percentage. I have a friend who lost 10 lbs, but wanted to lose 20. He decided to measure his body fat %. The truth was revealed. He lost 25 pounds of fat and gained 15 lbs of muscle. It's a mindset, that is hard to grasp, but trust the program. Stick to the 3 keys of fitness: Nutrition, Exercise, and Support. Feel free to add me.
  • PinkPixiexox
    PinkPixiexox Posts: 4,142 Member
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    Give yourself a break - 30lbs is an incredible amount, you've done so well.

    As human's (and women - especially) we are our own worst critics. Traditionally (and unfortunately) we are more likely to look at a body part and find flaws than to look at it and see the good. I've lost a total of 30 lbs too and I too am guilty of looking in the mirror and saying "My ARMS are still too wobbly" or "Ugh, my tummy STILL isn't flat". Instead I SHOULD be saying "Wow, I can fit in to clothes I couldn't 5 months ago" and "Look how much healthier I look".

    You'll get there - you will. Sometimes it takes the mind a bit longer to catch up - especially after being so used to 'looking a certain way'. Congratulations and keep up the great work :)