I feel lost...

Jen0004
Jen0004 Posts: 3 Member
edited October 2015 in Motivation and Support
Hey everyone so my name is Jenise. I started my journey on Oct. 4, 2013. Within a year i lost 50lbs. My starting weight was 238lbs. I made it all the way down to 187lbs BUT somewhere along the way i lost my motivation. I ended up gaining 12lbs back and im currently at 199lbs, almost in the 200's again!!! Im really sad and i feel like i ruined all my weightloss. Idk how to get back on track, i keep trying but everytime i fail!!! Have any of you gone through this & what did you do to get started again & get back on track?

Replies

  • sadiebrawl
    sadiebrawl Posts: 863 Member
    Obviously you know it's all mental. First, pat yourself on the back for realizing you're lost before gaining back all of your hard work. Try and imagine how you would feel then? Maybe that will help light a fire under your *kitten*?
    Would hate to see you throw in the tile, when you still have 39lbs of lose under your belt.
  • msunat97
    msunat97 Posts: 516 Member
    Sadie is right...it is completely a mental process. You have to build that internal discipline to keep going no matter what happens. I just finished a few weeks of no motivation. I'm back to logging food & exercising each day. You also need to find a support system to push / pull you through the tough times.
  • Jen0004
    Jen0004 Posts: 3 Member
    Thanks, yes i knw i need to get my mind right but i just cant seem too. Its been a very hard long journey and i know its going to never end because this is a lifestyle change but i really hope i can get back on track before i gain all the weight back and ruin my progress BUT i will never stop trying, i just really hope i can get back at it asap!!!
  • Violator_Rose
    Violator_Rose Posts: 31 Member
    First of all, congratulations for losing 50 lbs! Doesn't matter too much if you gained most of it back, the point is that you were able to lose the weight, so you know that you are capable of doing it again. Honestly, I feel like this happens to a lot of us the first time around. I went from 168 to 143, but a few months later, I went back up to 160. I felt pretty bummed for a few months, but eventually I gained the courage to get back at it again. Tell your friends about your weight loss goals. This has definitely helped me. I talk to my friends about my healthier diet choices, and a couple of times a week we go play tennis.....things like that help a lot.
  • lavaughan69
    lavaughan69 Posts: 459 Member
    Oh boy can I relate. I hit my goal weight and maintained it for a bit then went off the rails and have gained back 14lbs. Not too bad considering how much I was eating and drinking and not exercising. I got to a point where I was too afraid to get on the scale to see how bad the damage was. In all honesty, if my husband hadn't decided to get back on MFP and start behaving again I'm not sure how long it would have taken me to get refocused. I'm only on day 9 but already I'm feeling more motivated and stronger.

    Do you have someone that you know that also wants to lose weight and could do it with you? Sometimes a buddy system helps motivate you, almost in a competitive way, to stick with it.
  • Gavin_Campbell
    Gavin_Campbell Posts: 41 Member
    Been there done that. I put back on 40lbs and spent the last 4 months taking it back off. Feels so much better to be back. What pushed me was the fact that I couldn't fit into some clothes I enjoyed wearing. It hit me. I went back to the gym and made a schedule that I could keep. Now I'm back into the swing of things. I'll add you on my friends list... constantly posting motivating things. Anyone can add me also.
  • Jen0004
    Jen0004 Posts: 3 Member
    Well my sister was my weightloss partner and she hit a rough patch in life so she basically gave up. I kept going but then i hit a Plateau that i could not get out of no matter how hard i tried! Maybe i wasnt trying hard enough, so then after that i slowly gave up and started gaining weight. I started drinking coke again and i eat fast food almost every weekend. I say im start monday fresh but never do.
  • tldr: figure out what stresses you out in life and triggers bad decisions or helps contribute to laziness/lack of motivation and find alternate ways to deal with these situations, people, or events.

    I've been up and down a few times myself in terms of my weight, and I've found that I can't really rely on anything external to motivate me to get back on track. It just has to click, kind of like when I decided to start getting fit in the first place, and after once it clicks sticking to my goals is no problem, until something comes along and I let that derail me. So one thing that I can do to help myself to keep from getting derailed by the next big stressful life event, and which may be helpful for you in regaining focus, is simply identifying and developing coping strategies for triggers; what events, people, habits, activities, etc, are factors that contribute to you making poor choices about eating, or exercise? When these stressors inevitably happen (because it's life, and *kitten* happens), how will you handle them in a way that won't let you get off target?

    For example, I know that if I drink too often or too much, I can expect to fall off the fitness wagon for a few weeks or longer, so I have to be fairly mindful of my alcohol intake and not drink heavily for more than a night or two in a row. I know that when my parents visit, I tend to eat and drink way too much and that these eating and drinking habits will continue for several weeks after they've gone home, so I have to have strategies in place for when they visit to keep this from happening. Ditto for when I go on vacation - I need to have a plan in place for when I get home so I don't stay in "vacation mentality mode" when it comes to eating or exercise. I know that if I slack on my exercise routine for more than a few days my eating habits will also start to suffer because I tend to get hung up on all-or-nothing thinking; if I'm not exercising, why bother eating well. I know that if I get stuck at work for a couple extra hours I feel exhausted when I get off work and I'm starving and I tend to grab whatever is convenient, whether it fits my goals or not, so I have to pre-log my meals and snacks so that I'm making good decisions in the morning, when I am in a rational, logical, goal-oriented frame of mind and not making poor choices when I'm tired, hungry, and overcome by decision-fatigue.

    For me, it really just comes down to knowing yourself and being familiar with your own habits and tendencies and putting strategies in place ahead of time so that when you're feeling low on motivation, when you're tired, hungry, stressed, depressed, etc, you don't have to make decisions about your exercise or your eating in that moment, because in moments like those we tend to make stupid and self-destructive decisions.
  • jmerchant17
    jmerchant17 Posts: 5 Member
    That's the exact same boat I'm in! Lost 50lbs and gained 12 back and cannot seem to find motivation to get back into my good habits. Feel free to add me and we can try to keep each other motivated! :)
  • franfran1821
    franfran1821 Posts: 288 Member
    You did it before and you can do it again! Find that determination/aha moment and get back to work. Take your time so that it's sustainable and keep reminding yourself of all the reasons you want to lose the weight! Good luck!
  • lavaughan69
    lavaughan69 Posts: 459 Member
    Jen0004 wrote: »
    Well my sister was my weightloss partner and she hit a rough patch in life so she basically gave up. I kept going but then i hit a Plateau that i could not get out of no matter how hard i tried! Maybe i wasnt trying hard enough, so then after that i slowly gave up and started gaining weight. I started drinking coke again and i eat fast food almost every weekend. I say im start monday fresh but never do.

    Maybe start with one or two simple changes, give up the coke and switch it out for water. Go for a walk three times a week. Small things that help you generate motivation. Nothing like a pair of spandex to remind you why you want to improve the way you eat!!
  • FGTisme
    FGTisme Posts: 87 Member
    I hit my first goal back in February of this year, then spent the next six months putting almost 40 pounds back on. The thought of having to pull out my old jeans, because I could no longer fit in the smaller ones, motivated me. It took a few weeks of the old routine "I'll start on Monday" followed by a binge weekend as though I were on death row and being served my last meal. One Wednesday I finally said enough---I'm starting tomorrow. Four weeks later and I'm still at it. It's a decision I make every morning. Eat within my calorie goals and exercise (so I can eat more).

    Just decide.
  • fiddletime
    fiddletime Posts: 1,868 Member
    It sounds too easy- "just decide" and it also sounds so hard. The reality is that everyone on here decided to make their health a priority. Even if they weren't in the mood, even if they had a binge day or week and even if they couldn't exercise as much as they wanted. So, as hard as it is, you need to start logging your calories even when you screw up. I gained all of my weight back and some after I first got my goal weight. After all, I did it, right? So long, I'm at goal weight. HA! Just keep logging and get back into the habit of getting under your calorie allotment, and get to target weight- and read up on maintaining. I find it much harder to lose the second time around.