I'm an Emotional Eater and it Sucks!

Hello, I started with this group back in 2011, but as is always the case with me, I gave up and gained all my weight back plus extra. I hate that I eat for emotional reasons. Also, once I start dieting, I end up becoming obsessed with every calorie I put into my mouth, and if I miss a day of exercising, I feel like a total failure, and just give up. It all becomes too overwhelming for me. And if I eat something for pleasure thats not on my rigiddaily menu, I fall completely off the wagon, so to speak, and go on a binge and eat everything I can. It's a vicious cycle that I don't know how to break. I currently weigh 309 pounds, and I'm scared I won't be around to see my son grow up, and that breaks my heart. I'm just afraid I will fail again in my attempt to lose weight, and I feel very discouraged. But I know I can't afford to give up, so I am going to give it yet another go. Hopefully I will be successful this time. I hope all of you are successful as well. ☺


  • Lovee_Dove7
    Lovee_Dove7 Posts: 741 Member
    Sorry about the struggle! I can relate to the emotional eating. I think it's very real struggle for many. Earlier this year I learned that my emotional eating was really that foods are addicting, and I was experiencing that addiction. For example, no one ever binges on eggplant. Or kale. It will be foods like cheese or pudding or chips or bread. I learned to really fill up on non-starchy veggies, protein like meat, chicken, fish, and fats like avocado, nuts, olive oil, coconut oil, salmon, flax and chia seeds for example. It's amazing how my appetite became regulated in a matter of days, overcoming years of addiction issues. I just didn't realize I was addicted to what I considered normal foods.
  • Lynn0922
    Lynn0922 Posts: 2 Member
    Thank you for your reply. I had never looked at it from the angle of being addicted to certain foods, all the sugar laden, carb filled ones of course. Lol I guess I'm afraid too that if I give up those yummy foods, I can never have them again. But like you said, getting the sugar out of my system by eating healthier foods would help my appetite become regulated again, and that would be wonderful. Thank you for your wondrrful insight!
  • Lucille4444
    Lucille4444 Posts: 284 Member
    I think I read somewhere that it only takes a couple of weeks to form a habit. Can you think of something besides eating (gardening, walking the dog) that you can do when your emotions are in turmoil, and maybe see in a couple if weeks whether that can be your 'go to' activity instead of eating when things get tough?
  • Lovee_Dove7
    Lovee_Dove7 Posts: 741 Member
    Yes, fill up on the essential foods first, but it's okay to have those treats after that, IMO. Best wishes!
  • 3dangel443
    3dangel443 Posts: 1 Member
    I'm right there with you! I too am an emotional eater, AND I'm addicted to sweets! I'm on day 24 of NO added sugar challenge through the gym I belong to. I've found 2 things that have helped me - eat a soft boiled egg EVERY morning, along with a healthy breakfast - like old fashioned oatmeal with berries. The naturopathic doctor at the gym says that whatever you eat first thing in th AM is what you'll crave the rest of the day. The second thing that has helped me is EFT, or tapping. If you've never heard of it, look it up... it's helped immensely! The struggle is REAL!
  • danebane34
    danebane34 Posts: 1 Member
  • yardprincess
    yardprincess Posts: 42 Member
    Your body needs 6 essential nutrients: Carbohydrates (grains - unrefined is best!), protein (lean meats, eggs, beans), fat (yes, a reduced amount of healthy fats - like olive oil and nuts, fatty fish - is good for you!), water, minerals and vitamins.... and plus one: fiber!!! You acquire calories or energy from carbs, proteins and fat. Fiber is wonderful since it doesn't give you any extra calories since it's just a way to feel full and push digestion along.... The best advice I would give you is to reduce refined sugars and load up on lean protein and fiber which you get in the form of: leafy green veggies, beans, fruit like raspberries and oranges/apples and eat as much fresh, unprocessed food as you can.
    Don't give up and don't despair.... you can do any thing you put your mind to! It just takes time, be patience with yourself and forgive yourself when you get off track - THEN MAKE A CONSCIOUS DECISION TO GET BACK ON TRACK, don't give up and start over tomorrow. Start over with the very next thing you put in your mouth.... you are worth it, and you can do it. :)
  • Megan__Marie
    Megan__Marie Posts: 182 Member
    I can literally relate to everything you've said. I do exactly the same thing all the time, and don't know how to deal with it! Emotional eating is the worst!
  • lemmie177
    lemmie177 Posts: 479 Member
    It sounds like you'd benefit from practicing some self-compassion. You're too hard on yourself, a perfectionist, and not allowing yourself to be human. Be kind to yourself and expect roadblocks on the way to success. Failure only happens when you stop trying.

    Most emotional eating is actually about avoidance. People feel sad or ashamed, maybe angry or frustrated, so they eat to avoid the emotion, but it doesn't really work. Next time, try to just let yourself feel whatever it is you're feeling. It's okay to be sad/angry/what have you. It'll be over sooner than you think.

    Another tip is to have a backup plan. You say you fall off the wagon when you deviate from your rigid diet/schedule. No one can be on their 'A' game 24/7. It's only natural. I'd encourage you to have a plan 'B' for the hard times. For example, when the going gets tough, plan out a 'B' week of 2 gym days instead of 4, a walk outdoors instead of cardio, etc.

    I recently borrowed a book that handles the emotional aspects of weight loss with a lot of insight. I'm still in the middle of it, but I think it might help you. If I am So Smart Why Can't I Lose Weight?

  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,346 Member
    The best thing you can do is plan some advance strategy. What exactly WILL you do if tempted to eat emotionally? What's the plan for when you go off the rails. Make some very specific decisions NOW, so that when emotions are high and you are confronted with those circumstance, you will have strategies that you can implement.