I'm getting married and need more motivation

requiemcrow
requiemcrow Posts: 20 Member
edited November 25 in Health and Weight Loss
Hello! I'm not exactly new to the weight loss idea, but I am new to trying it in a community setting. I've been on fitcracy, and while I found support there, I can't seem to find my motivation. I'm getting married in a couple years, and I want to not be embarrassed when shopping for my wedding dress because of my size. I love me as I am, but I know that I can be better. Can anyone help me find more motivation and thing's that actually help?

Replies

  • afatpersonwholikesfood
    afatpersonwholikesfood Posts: 577 Member
    Your motivation has to come from you, and it probably needs to be bigger than a wedding dress. What happens after the wedding? In my case, I've actually been using my wedding photo as my before picture! I still love my wedding dress. I was sad to try it on and have it no longer fit even though that is obviously the point of losing.

    As for being embarrassed, you're a paying customer and a bride-to-be...if anyone at a bridal shop gives you any crap, then take your money elsewhere. Why should you be embarrassed about needing a wedding dress? There are a ton of plus size options now, and they actually aren't all hideous.

    Okay, speech aside, I know what it's like to try to find motivation and come up empty. I didn't aim for weight loss initially. I just got tired of how I felt physically. It's so much bigger than just the frustration of nothing fitting or the days when you're especially critical of yourself - when you live in a body with 100+ extra pounds on it and not a lot of activity on a regular basis, you feel it. It hurts. It's exhausting and uncomfortable all the time. It's scary.

    I started with trying to be more active and adding in fruits and vegetables quite a while before I made the decision to take weight off. Mentally, I wasn't ready to tackle my weight yet again, but I knew I could work on a few small habits that might make a difference in my health. Eventually, I decided to start logging and counting calories, but I began with a very small deficit. It snowballed from there. In the past, I would wait for motivation to hit like lightning. This time, finding it was more of a process.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    requiemcrow wrote: »
    Hello! I'm not exactly new to the weight loss idea, but I am new to trying it in a community setting. I've been on fitcracy, and while I found support there, I can't seem to find my motivation. I'm getting married in a couple years, and I want to not be embarrassed when shopping for my wedding dress because of my size. I love me as I am, but I know that I can be better. Can anyone help me find more motivation and thing's that actually help?

    Improved health- > reduce health risks, reduce pain, more energy
    Feel sexier, improved self-confidence
    More dress choices available possibly
    Abilitity to do more things-> stronger, more flexible, walk/run further
    New hobby or interest with cooking or fitness activity...possibly shared experience with future spouse
    Being a good example to others
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    Don't wait around for motivation to fix everything. It won't.

    Just do it! :smile:
  • zacksnana
    zacksnana Posts: 3,230 Member
    Orphia wrote: »
    Don't wait around for motivation to fix everything. It won't.

    Just do it! :smile:

    Yep. This right here.
  • ilovecereal1982
    ilovecereal1982 Posts: 1,194 Member
    Hey I was just at a wedding like a month ago and lemme tell you...they had great music there...and lemme say this...I danced my heart out...I had the inner spirit of Kevin Bacon from footloose!!!! Anywho....umm...I love dancing???
  • amayzing365
    amayzing365 Posts: 6 Member
    I agree with the first poster, your motivation has to come from YOU--but getting some cheerleaders in your corner to help PUSH you to that goal doesn't hurt either! Got many friends on here to help you? Do you have your food diary viewable to them? Are you setting attainable realistic goals to start?
    Are you willing to make changes to the foods you eat to reach those goals?
    A lot depends on your level of commitment. You gotta do some real soul searching and know yourself to answer those questions honestly (to yourself)
    Start with one day at a time, one pound at a time. And we'll be here to help you reach those goals.
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
    Orphia wrote: »
    Don't wait around for motivation to fix everything. It won't.

    Just do it! :smile:

    YOU, I like.
  • Lu_wallace06
    Lu_wallace06 Posts: 107 Member
    baby steps. just take one day at a time, start off by doing small little exercises when you get up.. squats, lunges.. the stairs is a great way to start..go up and down them twice a day in..and then increase.
    add me i'd love to help you. :)
  • ahoy_m8
    ahoy_m8 Posts: 3,053 Member
    Lu_wallace06 wrote: »
    baby steps. just take one day at a time, start off by doing small little exercises when you get up.. squats, lunges.. the stairs is a great way to start..go up and down them twice a day in..and then increase.
    add me i'd love to help you. :)

    Agreed. When motivation wanes, doing the next right thing, taking it one day at a time, gets it done.
  • Bxqtie116
    Bxqtie116 Posts: 552 Member
    Start setting small goals for yourself. Work on losing 5 lbs then move up to 10 lbs. Set exercise goals like you'll workout 2x a week. Once the weight starts to come off, you'll feel more confident to keep going and possible add more goals for yourself.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    The thought of wedding photos was motivation enough for me!

    You have a couple years to lose your goal of 100 pounds - that's enough time to do it safely but you should start now.
  • vivmom2014
    vivmom2014 Posts: 1,649 Member
    Lu_wallace06 wrote: »
    baby steps. just take one day at a time, start off by doing small little exercises when you get up.. squats, lunges.. the stairs is a great way to start..go up and down them twice a day in..and then increase.
    add me i'd love to help you. :)

    Calorie deficit for weight loss. Exercise not necessary. I love exercise, but nope - not necessary to drop weight.

  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
    Motivation is only one part of the picture. One needs a specific plan.
  • XxQueenMxX
    XxQueenMxX Posts: 683 Member
    I got married 6 months ago and going dress shopping was my fear!! So much that I wasnt even excited to go do it. Until i finally started browing for wedding dresses online and I saw some that I'd never think I could wear but truly loved. That somewhat motivated me to get on it and start losing some weight to go shopping, but still dreaded it and kinda pushed it off. Anyway, after a few months and my wedding date getting closer i finally went shopping and tried on a dress i fell in love with, it looked nice BUT not exaclty how I wanted it to feel, so that really motivated me to work hard and stay focused on my weight loss journey. When i would workout I would honestly imagine my self it that dress and how I wanted to look. I even needed to get it fixed the week of the wedding because it was too loose. Anyway, im not saying this will work for you but maybe if you start dress shopping you will get the motivation you need. And let me tell you, it is far more rewarding as you start getting closer to your goal. There are many great feelings that come along with it besides looking the best you can on your wedding day ;)
  • requiemcrow
    requiemcrow Posts: 20 Member
    ilovecereal1982 wrote: »
    Hey I was just at a wedding like a month ago and lemme tell you...they had great music there...and lemme say this...I danced my heart out...I had the inner spirit of Kevin Bacon from footloose!!!! Anywho....umm...I love dancing???

    Telling me that I should just dance it out? Lol I do at home when my fiance is not home... And sometimes when he is lol
  • requiemcrow
    requiemcrow Posts: 20 Member
    RodaRose wrote: »
    Motivation is only one part of the picture. One needs a specific plan.

    Think you could help me figure one out then? I'm terrible at planning. Always have been.
  • requiemcrow
    requiemcrow Posts: 20 Member
    Orphia wrote: »
    Don't wait around for motivation to fix everything. It won't.

    Just do it! :smile:

    That's why I'm here.
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    requiemcrow wrote: »
    Orphia wrote: »
    Don't wait around for motivation to fix everything. It won't.

    Just do it! :smile:

    That's why I'm here.

    Good plan! :)

    Weigh and log everything you eat. Eat the foods you like and stay at your calorie limit. Win!
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  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
    requiemcrow wrote: »
    RodaRose wrote: »
    Motivation is only one part of the picture. One needs a specific plan.

    Think you could help me figure one out then? I'm terrible at planning. Always have been.

    Your plan milady...

    Read the first post in
    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants/p1
    And
    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1296011/calorie-counting-101/p1

    Then move more ...walk places


    Make purposeful exercise count

    If you can't bring yourself to do free weights yet then do a decent bodyweight programme
    http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2009/12/09/beginner-body-weight-workout-burn-fat-build-muscle/


    If you have the guts to start lifting ...do it now
    Books
    Strong Curves
    New Rules of Lifting for Women

    Structured online programmes
    http://stronglifts.com/5x5/
    https://www.muscleandstrength.com/workouts/jason-blaha-ice-cream-fitness-5x5-novice-workout
    http://www.muscleandfitness.com/workouts/workout-routines/4-week-guide-starting-strength
  • ASKyle
    ASKyle Posts: 1,475 Member
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    The thought of wedding photos was motivation enough for me!

    You have a couple years to lose your goal of 100 pounds - that's enough time to do it safely but you should start now.

    +1, those photos will be around forever, I want to look and feel my best!
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