Dr made me feel like crap

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ericaconti
ericaconti Posts: 72 Member
in Motivation and Support
This morning I went to my doctor for my annual check-up. I've lost 125lbs and couldn't wait for my doctor to reinforce my awesomeness. Instead, I got something totally different.

First the nurse questioned me, not in a friendly manner, about my scale results. I proudly told her I've lost over 125 pounds! Then I hear my doctor questioning the nurse, in the hallway, about whether or not she weighed me correctly. I hear the nurse reply that I told her I've lost over 125lbs.

In walks my doctor who immediately questions me about my weight loss. She didn't ask how I lost the weight. Instead, she questioned why. I found myself trying to justify to my doctor why I decided to go from morbidly obese to healthy.

I walked in feeling proud of my hard work and accomplishments, but left feeling like complete *kitten*.

Anyone have an experience like this? Think I need to find a new doctor.

Replies

  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
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    You need a new doctor. If you are at a healthy weight and they don't have concerns over your blood work results there was no need for them to act like that. Congratulations on improving your health! Find a doctor who celebrates that with you and checks to make sure your blood work looks good.

    I had a doctor tell me to lose weight because I am in the slightly overweight category. I explained that I am a competitive bodybuilder and my body fat was athletic. I had to show that I had visible abs to get them to stop treating me like that. Then I found a new doctor.
  • agerlica
    agerlica Posts: 1 Member
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    You for sure need a new doctor! Congratulations on your achivement!
  • heybales
    heybales Posts: 18,842 Member
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    125 lbs in 1 yr - or 2.4 lbs weekly on average. And if you actually lost it in shorter time, which they wouldn't be aware of course with an annual checkup, then even faster rate.

    Yes - I could very well see that their response would include concern over that rate of loss. While that might be a reasonable rate at the start, eventually it would not be reasonable and can easily lead to some health problems too.

    So that was likely the reason for the initial response.

    Are you sure her questions about it were only about why you wanted to lose weight - and not why did you lose so fast or other similar why questions?

    I can easily see getting put off by those initial responses and emotionally not hearing the questions correctly after that, being put on the defensive.

    But 2.4 lbs avg weekly the entire time does sound unhealthy, and would have undoubtable included a fair amount of muscle mass if you held to the average loss amounts, and that doesn't speak well for maintenance success.

    But here's hoping you can do it anyway.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,712 Member
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    Wow, good for you! That's an amazing accomplishment! How long did it take you? Were they concerned you lost too quickly or too much? Even so, the way it was handled was incorrect. You shouldn't let them influence your feelings at all. You should be proud no matter what the reactions of others are.

    I'd find a new doctor, but I'd also contact this doctor and nurse and give them your reason for leaving in a non-emotional way. They need the feedback. Maybe it will prevent this from happening to someone else. Either way, keep up the great work!
  • rosebarnalice
    rosebarnalice Posts: 3,488 Member
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    Sadly, I suspect what went through your doctor and nurse's brains was one of two things: (a) excessive weight loss associated with drug abuse or some crazy weight loss product; or (b) eating disorder.

    Earlier in the summer I was fighting an intenstinal infection and, I dropped 12 lbs in 3 weeks. I was under a doctor's care, and she was concerned about my rapid weight loss because she knew it was a symptom of my infection. But as part of the conversation, she told me that she has seen an alarming increase of patients--particularly women--with secondary health problems (like heart conditions) from OTC weight loss concoctions and/or meth and other serious drug problems.

    Don't blame your doctor and his/her staff. They see a very ugly side of our world that many of us are blessed to only drive by.
  • ericaconti
    ericaconti Posts: 72 Member
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    I didn't lose it all in a year. It was actually 1.5 years. So 125lbs in 18 months which I did make clear to her.

    heybales wrote: »
    125 lbs in 1 yr - or 2.4 lbs weekly on average. And if you actually lost it in shorter time, which they wouldn't be aware of course with an annual checkup, then even faster rate.

    Yes - I could very well see that their response would include concern over that rate of loss. While that might be a reasonable rate at the start, eventually it would not be reasonable and can easily lead to some health problems too.

    So that was likely the reason for the initial response.

    Are you sure her questions about it were only about why you wanted to lose weight - and not why did you lose so fast or other similar why questions?

    I can easily see getting put off by those initial responses and emotionally not hearing the questions correctly after that, being put on the defensive.

    But 2.4 lbs avg weekly the entire time does sound unhealthy, and would have undoubtable included a fair amount of muscle mass if you held to the average loss amounts, and that doesn't speak well for maintenance success.

    But here's hoping you can do it anyway.

  • diana_marie8302
    diana_marie8302 Posts: 84 Member
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    I had a lady type doctor once tell me, bluntly, you are overweight, lose weight. She was very rude about it and I felt she was being very unprofessional, especially considering she had a good 30 pounds on me. Go F yourself if you can't figure out out to talk to your patients appropriately. They need to find a new profession. I agree, though, find a new doctor, and continue rocking that awesome accomplishment!!! Congrats on that fantastic weight loss :smiley:
  • tazmainian_dv
    tazmainian_dv Posts: 60 Member
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    Ericaconti, no worries. Weight loss like that sometimes shocks a Dr. and they begin thinking the worse like cancer, emotional problems etc. Also most physicians are greatly over worked people that have bad days too.

    Dr's that treat patients like numbers are a pet peeve of mine and I correct their behavior immediately, if it persists then I change Dr's unless they are just outstanding in their field for some obscure reason like surgery.

    Give her another chance, if she persists then change Dr's but before you do ask her why she treats you the way she does and tell her how it makes you feel. Some times people are so self absorbed in their own little worlds that they forget that their behavior effects others and the harm it does. BTW....CONGRATULATIONS on your weight loss! Way to go girl! If your doc is not I am, and that is proud of you!
  • auddii
    auddii Posts: 15,357 Member
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    tazmainian_dv wrote: »
    Ericaconti, no worries. Weight loss like that sometimes shocks a Dr. and they begin thinking the worse like cancer, emotional problems etc. Also most physicians are greatly over worked people that have bad days too.

    Dr's that treat patients like numbers are a pet peeve of mine and I correct their behavior immediately, if it persists then I change Dr's unless they are just outstanding in their field for some obscure reason like surgery.

    Give her another chance, if she persists then change Dr's but before you do ask her why she treats you the way she does and tell her how it makes you feel. Some times people are so self absorbed in their own little worlds that they forget that their behavior effects others and the harm it does. BTW....CONGRATULATIONS on your weight loss! Way to go girl! If your doc is not I am, and that is proud of you!

    This. And I was super proud when I'd dropped about 50lbs from my last visit, but the doctor moved offices and institutions, and there was a failure to get medical records transferred, so I ended up essentially being treated like a new patient. :sad:

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