What am I doing wrong?
Replies
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"On the age thing, I'm 45 and started losing at 44, and it wasn't a problem. I think it's MUCH easier to pick a number you can stick with consistently, even if it's a slower loss, than continually failing and getting discouraged, and you get there faster in the long run. And once you start losing it feels great -- you don't have to wait until you get to goal to start feeling the benefits."
That's my problem. If I bust my *kitten*, deprive myself, and kill myself for a month but I've only lost maybe a pound (and sometimes not even that), then hell yeah I'm going to get discouraged! If I can sit around doing nothing and eating whatever and weigh the same as I do working out daily and measuring every vegetable I eat and skipping out on all the good stuff, what's the point? That's what I'm trying to figure out.
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diannethegeek wrote: »Yep. 1200-1300 is my given goal for losing. Since I'm so damn short I'm supposed to weigh 95-115. Last time I weighed 115 I was 18 years old and worked out five hours a day. Sorry, I just don't have a spare 5 hours now to devote.
If you're going to brush off every suggestion we make, then you may not be ready to lose right now. It sounds like you have a lot going on in your life. Why don't you concentrate on maintenance for a while and try again when you're better prepared?
QFT (quoted for truth)...0 -
"On the age thing, I'm 45 and started losing at 44, and it wasn't a problem. I think it's MUCH easier to pick a number you can stick with consistently, even if it's a slower loss, than continually failing and getting discouraged, and you get there faster in the long run. And once you start losing it feels great -- you don't have to wait until you get to goal to start feeling the benefits."
That's my problem. If I bust my *kitten*, deprive myself, and kill myself for a month but I've only lost maybe a pound (and sometimes not even that), then hell yeah I'm going to get discouraged! If I can sit around doing nothing and eating whatever and weigh the same as I do working out daily and measuring every vegetable I eat and skipping out on all the good stuff, what's the point? That's what I'm trying to figure out.
A more moderate goal means that you won't be killing yourself or skipping out on the good stuff. Many of us continued to eat our favorite foods while losing weight, we just made sure it fit within our plans.
You can sit around doing nothing and weight the same at the end of this month or you can consistently hit a moderate deficit and make progress towards your goals. The choices aren't "do nothing" or "deprive myself." There's a third choice. And yeah, it can be a bit slower -- but I still got from my start point to my end point in less than a year. Given the option between losing at a slower rate or sitting here still around 160, I know I would choose the first choice again.0 -
"On the age thing, I'm 45 and started losing at 44, and it wasn't a problem. I think it's MUCH easier to pick a number you can stick with consistently, even if it's a slower loss, than continually failing and getting discouraged, and you get there faster in the long run. And once you start losing it feels great -- you don't have to wait until you get to goal to start feeling the benefits."
That's my problem. If I bust my *kitten*, deprive myself, and kill myself for a month but I've only lost maybe a pound (and sometimes not even that), then hell yeah I'm going to get discouraged! If I can sit around doing nothing and eating whatever and weigh the same as I do working out daily and measuring every vegetable I eat and skipping out on all the good stuff, what's the point? That's what I'm trying to figure out.
You're not really listening. You don't need to deprive yourself, and it isn't going to be over in a month, no matter what you do. There is a way to lose weight while still eating the foods you like, and a reasonable amount of food.0 -
That's my problem. If I bust my *kitten*, deprive myself, and kill myself for a month but I've only lost maybe a pound (and sometimes not even that), then hell yeah I'm going to get discouraged! If I can sit around doing nothing and eating whatever and weigh the same as I do working out daily and measuring every vegetable I eat and skipping out on all the good stuff, what's the point? That's what I'm trying to figure out.
I think your problem is that you think dieting requires depriving yourself, busting your *kitten*, or skipping out on all the good stuff. It really doesn't. I'm about 55 lb down and I eat plenty of "junk food" - but I work it into my goals rather than allow it to derail my goals.
You can eat pizza and chocolate and ice cream and potato chips and cake and lose weight, as long add you eat them in proper moderation and fit them into your plan. Dieting isn't always easy but it shouldn't be extremely hard either.
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rankinsect wrote: »
That's my problem. If I bust my *kitten*, deprive myself, and kill myself for a month but I've only lost maybe a pound (and sometimes not even that), then hell yeah I'm going to get discouraged! If I can sit around doing nothing and eating whatever and weigh the same as I do working out daily and measuring every vegetable I eat and skipping out on all the good stuff, what's the point? That's what I'm trying to figure out.
I think your problem is that you think dieting requires depriving yourself, busting your *kitten*, or skipping out on all the good stuff. It really doesn't. I'm about 55 lb down and I eat plenty of "junk food" - but I work it into my goals rather than allow it to derail my goals.
You can eat pizza and chocolate and ice cream and potato chips and cake and lose weight, as long add you eat them in proper moderation and fit them into your plan. Dieting isn't always easy but it shouldn't be extremely hard either.
Ditto. My diary is public OP. You wanna see what near 20 lbs of weight loss comes from: go look. It's coffee. And Beef Stroganoff, and Tacos, and chocolate chip cookies, and yeah broccoli and salad and stuff, but not much. I don't feel deprived and I would never let myself be, because I'd give up. I'm weak that way. I'd blow this off, rationalize it away, the end. The only reason I'm sticking with is because I figured out the LOGGING, so I learned how to fit in a cookie or two, and my coffee, and still eat enough low calorie stuff to feel full (not deprived). And I'M ON 12OO A DAY. I'm not suggesting you be, but you have GOT to know that this weight loss LIFESTYLE change doesn't have to be miserable, or even particularly uncomfortable.0 -
I need to lose as fast as possible. I'm 34, and the older I get the harder it's going to be.
Start by setting it to 0.5 lb per week. Eat those calories for a few weeks, then go down to 1.0 if you can handle the calories. At 115 you're at the upper end of your range, but not overweight. For your goal and height, a loss of 2 lb per week is not recommended. In the long run, it will take only a few more weeks to lose at a lower pace and you will prob be more successful with it.0 -
That's my problem. If I bust my *kitten*, deprive myself, and kill myself for a month but I've only lost maybe a pound (and sometimes not even that), then hell yeah I'm going to get discouraged! If I can sit around doing nothing and eating whatever and weigh the same as I do working out daily and measuring every vegetable I eat and skipping out on all the good stuff, what's the point? That's what I'm trying to figure out.
I'm not trying to be rude and I'm going to try to type this in the nicest way possible but jogging two miles a day "about" three times per week and not logging your food accurately, food scale or not, is hardly "busting your *kitten*". In fact, I am 99% positive that the reason you're not seeing results is because you're actually half-assing what you're doing. You claim you stopped snacking, you're eating clean, etc. but then you went on to say that you want to eat 1200 per day but you're always hungry and end up binging. The reality is that you are eating more calories than you burn per day whether you like it or not. Unless you are some enigma with the rarest of rare medical conditions, you should be losing weight if you're eating less than you burn. The fact that you've gained 10 pounds despite all of your supposed efforts is a testament to the fact that you're eating entirely too much to see weight loss or even maintain. Like @diannethegeek said, you don't seem ready for weight loss and should try to get a handle on maintenance instead. You're currently making weight loss more complicated than it is.0 -
I need to lose as fast as possible. I'm 34, and the older I get the harder it's going to be.
Start by setting it to 0.5 lb per week. Eat those calories for a few weeks, then go down to 1.0 if you can handle the calories. At 115 you're at the upper end of your range, but not overweight. For your goal and height, a loss of 2 lb per week is not recommended. In the long run, it will take only a few more weeks to lose at a lower pace and you will prob be more successful with it.
She's 160 pounds, not 115 pounds.0 -
5'1, 160, I want to eat 1200 calories a day, but I never feel full. If I eat until I feel full I go way over. If I make myself stop, I eventually give in and binge. I eat small, low-calorie meals, but I'm hungry again in an hour. Tracking makes me insane trying to weigh every little ingredient in everything I cook and then divide it all up into portions. (I know, that makes me sound like an idiot, but I just haven't found an easy way for me to do it. My little two eggs with some cheese and mushrooms this morning took me five minutes to get logged. Not even joking.)
Logging gets easier the more you do it. MyFitnessPal keeps track of the foods you use most frequently in each category (breakfast, lunch, dinner, snack), so they are always very handy to find. On my phone, I just start typing the food I ate, and it will pull it up. A few taps here and there, and I am done. Once you have built a good database of your most frequent foods, logging takes seconds.
Also, use recipe builder to enter what you cook. You enter the recipe ingredients one time, including the number of servings each recipe makes. Then, when you go to log it, it's right there in one easy step. You could enter your morning eggs into it, and logging that just went from minutes to a few seconds.
Commit to logging accurately and consistently and you will see great results. It really is worth the effort. (And, just as a friendly reminder...weight loss does take a little effort...how bad do you want it?)0 -
It's about finding the way of eating that suits you, really.
Today I didn't exercise (resting a hurt ankle), and I'm going to be enjoying a fruit scone and a magnum mini icecream tonight when I watch some telly. How so? I planned my food out for the day to account for the yummy food, counting up the calories and logging it. My count for the day will be coming in at around 1250 calories. Earlier today I had a chicken dinner (grilled chicken leg, veg and beans) and a large bowl of vegetable soup for lunch with another fruit scone. I skipped breakfast.
This is what works for me. Planning, logging, and including food that makes me smile. I do exercise usually but its in the form of brisk walking, about a 45 min walk a day - because that is the exercise I enjoy. Lovely walk nearby with trees by a river.
I don't think you should kill yourself following a routine that you don't enjoy and find discouraging. If your goal is to lose weight but what you are doing now is not working for you, then change it.
But what you do need to do is count the calories. If you want to lose a pound a week, yes that means for your current stats aiming for 1200 calories. No one can change this figure for you. It's ... science! If you can't eat that little, then eat more and accept that the weight loss will be slower. If you exercise, you might lose more, but if you eat back all your exercise calories, then it won't contribute to weight loss but instead go towards a healthier body.
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Logging gets easier the more you do it. MyFitnessPal keeps track of the foods you use most frequently in each category (breakfast, lunch, dinner, snack), so they are always very handy to find. On my phone, I just start typing the food I ate, and it will pull it up. A few taps here and there, and I am done. Once you have built a good database of your most frequent foods, logging takes seconds.
Also, use recipe builder to enter what you cook. You enter the recipe ingredients one time, including the number of servings each recipe makes. Then, when you go to log it, it's right there in one easy step. You could enter your morning eggs into it, and logging that just went from minutes to a few seconds.
Commit to logging accurately and consistently and you will see great results. It really is worth the effort. (And, just as a friendly reminder...weight loss does take a little effort...how bad do you want it?)
Yup. Once you build out your recipes and meals it can be super fast. It typically takes me one to three minutes to pre-log a day, and a lot of that is deciding what I will eat and playing with servings until I get my meals in the calorie range I want. It's part of my evening routine that is faster than brushing my teeth before bed.0 -
1200 is pretty low in calories, and if you are binge eating that is a good sign that you are being too restrictive. That could be the calorie amount or trying to restrict foods you tell yourself are unhealthy. I would suggest 1800 kcals to start with PLUS accurate logging (and 3 meals & 0-2 snacks per day, generally having a balance of 3 food groups at each meal and NO other restriction on what you eat). If you haven't lost at 2 weeks of accurate logging at that amount you can cut down gradually until you start losing. If you continue to binge eat at that larger amount, consider seeing a therapist.0
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"On the age thing, I'm 45 and started losing at 44, and it wasn't a problem. I think it's MUCH easier to pick a number you can stick with consistently, even if it's a slower loss, than continually failing and getting discouraged, and you get there faster in the long run. And once you start losing it feels great -- you don't have to wait until you get to goal to start feeling the benefits."
That's my problem. If I bust my *kitten*, deprive myself, and kill myself for a month but I've only lost maybe a pound (and sometimes not even that), then hell yeah I'm going to get discouraged! If I can sit around doing nothing and eating whatever and weigh the same as I do working out daily and measuring every vegetable I eat and skipping out on all the good stuff, what's the point? That's what I'm trying to figure out.
I started when I was 34. What you're saying is EXACTLY the reason why it took me so long to decide to lose weight - I wasn't gaining and eating what I wanted, so I didn't see the point of depriving myself and killing myself at the gym to lose (I had 65 pounds to lose to be in the normal BMI range).
Then one day I got sick of being fat and stuffing my face and realized that I WAS actually slowly gaining weight, so I decided to give it a try. I was shocked when I realized that I didn't have to deprive myself. I set my goal to 1700 (to lose 1 pound a week) and still managed to fit things I liked - in moderation. Then after a couple weeks I realized that if I exercised, I could eat more, so I started doing that (my kids were 5 as well)... walking or home videos to start... I'm taller than you (5'5") but never had to eat less than 1650 to lose (I used http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/ to figure out my goal).
But I REALLY decided to give it a shot. That means weighing my food, focusing on protein and good fat and limiting higher carb foods because they're not filling. That means finding lower calorie/more filling options to things I liked (when possible). That meant skipping the bun on a burger sometimes so I could have two squares of chocolate or a cookie, and sometimes it means having to wait a month until I have the calories for that croissant I've been craving forever, but I CAN eat cookies and croissants and lose... just not every day.
I lost 80 pounds and been maintaining that loss for 1.5 year. But yeah... you don't NEED to exercise to lose weight, but I don't think I could have lost the weight without it because I like eating too much, and those 300-400 extra calories (now) make a huge difference. I found a gym with a babysitting area, bought home videos, and an exercise bike. Now I have no excuse not to hop on the bike if I'm watching TV (unless my legs need a rest from all the cardio, obviously).0 -
It really sounds like you don't want to lose, losing 1lb a month is still losing, and your doing right by your body. Harsh, I know, but sitting around eating what you want has only gotten you into the mess you are in now. Like all of us. You bust your ****, kill yourself working out, because, you don't want to end up like a blimp or dead.0
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You could start with just counting what you'd normally eat daily on MFP, and then cutting out extra bits here and there. (The extra bits are what got all of us overweight in the first place!) Don't concentrate on "clean eating", it has nothing to do with weight loss. Eat whatever you like, but in smaller portions. It's ok to have a few maintenance days in there too, like eating a little bit more food on some days. But try to remember to count everything on MFP!0
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These are great responses. If you look at the Success Stories, you will see people who have lost huge amounts of weight at all ages. I mean hundreds of pounds at ages greater than 34. We all have our personal challenges. I know you want it to come off quickly but that might not be feasible for you at the moment. I had to get that out of my mindset too. It took some time to take pack it on and it will take time to take it off. Building up momentum in the right direction means telling your body to stop and turn directions.
There are people on this board who lost weight without exercise. You may need to exercise to eat more calories, or lose the exercise for now so that your body is not screaming for food. What is working for me is to eat vegetables at least twice a day. And I am now eating fruit as a snack. If you get your fiber in you will want to eat less. You might have to eat carrots, etc. in between meals just to keep you satiated and not tempted to binge.
And yes, even as I write, my belly is talking to me, but I drink water to give it something to churn on until I decide to eat my next meal. I keep water near me at all times.
Sacrifice is what is called for. But it's a choice and no matter the good information you get here, it comes down to making a choice and doing the work, hard though it may be at times.
Good luck.0 -
Lost over 85 pounds after 42 at 5'3. In better shape now than I was when I was 30 with a wacky thyroid that took a couple years to get under control.
- If you're binging, starving and miserable--you need to eat more. You'll lose at a slower pace and it will be more sustainable. Which is what you want--right? You don't want to lose and then gain it all back. Crash dieting, losing at a pace that isn't something you can do for the rest of your life. Be patient, it'll take time.
- Food is not the enemy, out habits around it are. Which includes starving and binging. Food is necessary for life and can be downright yummy! It's not evil.
- You can gain weight eating vegan, paleo, healthy, organic, whatever. Healthy calories are not magic, they're still calories.
- Take a look at your diet. Try more protein, fiber and healthy fat. They'll help you feel fuller, longer. Challenge yourself to try new recipes and to see what food combinations work best for you. Be patient, it'll take time.
- The weight didn't come on overnight, it's not going to come off overnight. I get the feeling when you've had enough and want the weight off NOW. We all do. But that's not how the body works. You want to create habits you can live with for the rest of your life and it doesn't sound like that's what you're doing right now. Eat more.
- Scooby can help you understand calorie needs for your body http://scoobysworkshop.com/calories-burned/
- Find exercise you enjoy. There's many, many, benefits to exercise besides calorie burning.
- A fitness tracker helped me. It keeps me accountable for moving frequently, tracks steps and calories burned and syncs with MFP for the whole picture.
Finally, please change the "fat cow" avatar. I'm certain I've responded on a previous thread and asked you to do the same thing. Yep, I did.
How you see yourself and your perception of your own self-worth will impact your ability to lose weight, consciously or not. Consider seeing a counselor to help you gain some perspective. Your efforts likely won't be successful unless you think you're worth the effort.- You've been saying the same thing for almost two years--since December of 2013. http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1153325/just-want-to-rant/p1
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rankinsect wrote: »
None of the clean eating is necessary or relevant to weight loss - it's bad portions, not bad foods that make us overweight. As long as you eat sensibly there's no need to go crazy on clean eating.
While it's true, and I see this said a lot on here, that it doesn't matter what you eat but how much in terms of weight loss. I do want to add that being able to eat a higher volume of food (lots of veggies, for example) does help balance those other foods that are smaller but have the same calories. They fill you up and can hold you over longer.0 -
I see myself as what the mirror and scale reflect.0
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I see myself as what the mirror and scale reflect.
You are 160 lbs... not a fat cow. None of us are fat cows, but you certainly are not.
I'm going to put this out there... you have mentioned binge eating, you seem semi-panicked about weight loss, and you are thinking about yourself and weight in very harsh terms... I think working with a therapist who specializes in treating eating disorders could be immensely helpful to you.
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If you've been doing this same thing (over-restricting at 1200, bingeing, rinse, repeat) for at least 2 years, and you're still in the same place, why are you so resistant to trying something different?0
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advisingwench wrote: »Tracking makes me insane trying to weigh every little ingredient in everything I cook and then divide it all up into portions. (I know, that makes me sound like an idiot, but I just haven't found an easy way for me to do it. My little two eggs with some cheese and mushrooms this morning took me five minutes to get logged. Not even joking.)
This may seem overly anal, but I've weighed every single pot and pan I own in grams and have the list of weights posted on my refrigerator. When I make a recipe that makes several servings, I weigh the entire thing, subtract the weight of the pot and divide by the number of servings. That gives me the exact weight of each individual portion and removes the guess work.
As I said, that might be a little overboard but it doesn't take up much time and at least I know I'm tracking correctly
This....is exactly what I do too! Not anal, effective
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Yep. 1200-1300 is my given goal for losing. Since I'm so damn short I'm supposed to weigh 95-115. Last time I weighed 115 I was 18 years old and worked out five hours a day. Sorry, I just don't have a spare 5 hours now to devote.
Actually, at 5'1", your healthy BMI range goes all the way up to 132 lbs.
You say your goal is 1200 to 1300, but you don't say how many calories you actually end up consuming as a result of this:If I eat until I feel full I go way over. If I make myself stop, I eventually give in and binge.
If you figure that out (through careful logging of everything you eat, not just the food you eat that would keep you within 1300 calories), then you'll know what your maintenance is (add calories up for X weeks, subtract 3500 calories for every pound gained in X weeks, divide by number of days in X weeks). Then you can set an appropriate goal that builds in a small deficit and doesn't leave you ravenous.0 -
rankinsect wrote: »
None of the clean eating is necessary or relevant to weight loss - it's bad portions, not bad foods that make us overweight. As long as you eat sensibly there's no need to go crazy on clean eating.
While it's true, and I see this said a lot on here, that it doesn't matter what you eat but how much in terms of weight loss. I do want to add that being able to eat a higher volume of food (lots of veggies, for example) does help balance those other foods that are smaller but have the same calories. They fill you up and can hold you over longer.
But since OP has gained ten pounds on this plan, it seems clear that this isn't what is happening here. A food being "clean" (whatever that means) doesn't mean that it is low calorie at a high volume. That's a whole different thing. Some foods that clean eaters would reject are actually better choices for volume eaters than some foods embraced by them.0 -
DeguelloTex wrote: »TwentyLosingTwenty wrote: »I'm 5'1, 121lbs and eat 1200-1400 calories a day! Try 1400-1600 and see if you can lose!
Weigh everything... The only time I will skip weighing is occasionally with a stick of celery, but I tend to over compensate by putting 2 stalks instead of 1!
Being hungry comes with losing weight I'm afraid...
If she's not losing at 1200-1300, she won't lose at 1400-1600.
I don't think she's actually eating 1200 -- she's getting so hungry that she's going over or bingeing. 1200 might be her goal, but it's probably not her observed average. She might actually be able to stick to 1400.
This was me. My daily cals were set to 1300 (I'm 5'5") and I couldn't lose because I'd get too hungry and go nom all the foodz. I've recently set my daily target to 1600 and I'm losing again because I'm not having "cheat days" or binging.0 -
1200 calories total doesn't really leave a lot of room for bigger calorie meals. 400 calories isn't really my idea of satisfying or filling.
Why don't you eat 1500 and burn off 300 through running? Earn what you eat. I love my food and I refuse to go below 1800. At 1700, I lose 1 lb a week, with exercise I lose between 1.5 & 2lbs each week. If it's TOM, I eat back half of my exercise calories.
Weighing food is time consuming at first, but now I just chop it up, weigh it out and cook my portion.0 -
Lost over 85 pounds after 42 at 5'3. In better shape now than I was when I was 30 with a wacky thyroid that took a couple years to get under control.
- If you're binging, starving and miserable--you need to eat more. You'll lose at a slower pace and it will be more sustainable. Which is what you want--right? You don't want to lose and then gain it all back. Crash dieting, losing at a pace that isn't something you can do for the rest of your life. Be patient, it'll take time.
- Food is not the enemy, out habits around it are. Which includes starving and binging. Food is necessary for life and can be downright yummy! It's not evil.
- You can gain weight eating vegan, paleo, healthy, organic, whatever. Healthy calories are not magic, they're still calories.
- Take a look at your diet. Try more protein, fiber and healthy fat. They'll help you feel fuller, longer. Challenge yourself to try new recipes and to see what food combinations work best for you. Be patient, it'll take time.
- The weight didn't come on overnight, it's not going to come off overnight. I get the feeling when you've had enough and want the weight off NOW. We all do. But that's not how the body works. You want to create habits you can live with for the rest of your life and it doesn't sound like that's what you're doing right now. Eat more.
- Scooby can help you understand calorie needs for your body http://scoobysworkshop.com/calories-burned/
- Find exercise you enjoy. There's many, many, benefits to exercise besides calorie burning.
- A fitness tracker helped me. It keeps me accountable for moving frequently, tracks steps and calories burned and syncs with MFP for the whole picture.
Finally, please change the "fat cow" avatar. I'm certain I've responded on a previous thread and asked you to do the same thing. Yep, I did.
How you see yourself and your perception of your own self-worth will impact your ability to lose weight, consciously or not. Consider seeing a counselor to help you gain some perspective. Your efforts likely won't be successful unless you think you're worth the effort.- You've been saying the same thing for almost two years--since December of 2013. http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1153325/just-want-to-rant/p1
Absolute truth here!
You are what you constantly tell yourself you are ....Time to start working on this part of life, my friend xo0 -
I see myself as what the mirror and scale reflect.
That's the problem that has us concerned for you. Your worth isn't what you weigh or what you look like. Until you see yourself as someone worthy of being healthy, you'll probably continue to sabotage your efforts (unconsciously or not) because you don't think you deserve it.
You've been thinking this for at least two years, and nothing's changed, has it?
Please see a counselor. You deserve to be healthy and happy.0 -
I used to do a 1.5lb/week calorie goal and was miserable trying to net that every day. I used to get a "screw-it" mentality when I didn't hit goal and four weeks later I'd be chastising myself for getting so far off course. Earlier this year I set my calorie goal to a .5lb/week loss and now I just try to hit it every day, whether I exercise or not. I typically run three times a week, which increases my rate of loss, but even if I decide to chill on the couch all week, I'm still making progress towards my goal and I feel a lot less stress over it.0
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