Food should not make me want to cry

hawaiifittness
hawaiifittness Posts: 36 Member
edited November 26 in Health and Weight Loss
But here I am 1 king sized reece's and 2 mini almond joys later bawling like a baby. Why do I feel such intense guilt over food? I am bulimic and I am going to my first doctor appointment about it later next week, but I can't get over this intense shame. I hate feeling like this but eat it anyways I am an idiot.

Replies

  • livelovebbg
    livelovebbg Posts: 45 Member
    Having an eating disorder does not make you an idiot. You're doing the right thing by seeking medical attention. Best of luck.
  • hawaiifittness
    hawaiifittness Posts: 36 Member
    I just feel dumb I keep making the same mistakes. I feel hopeless and like I will never change.
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
    Food tastes good and it's difficult to not eat whenever it's available, and it's available all the time now. Today the ideal is to be thin. (In them olden days it used to be the other way around, and not eating whenever possible would have been stupid.) No wonder this conflict makes you frustrated. You are not stupid. You are smart for seeking help. It can get better. It's hard, but it can get easier.
  • hawaiifittness
    hawaiifittness Posts: 36 Member
    Basically just venting a little so I don't give into it and make things worse
  • WBB55
    WBB55 Posts: 4,131 Member
    You're not an idiot and you can change. Believe me.
  • hawaiifittness
    hawaiifittness Posts: 36 Member
    I stayed under I guess that is progress
  • soapsandropes
    soapsandropes Posts: 269 Member
    I don't look at food as a mistake, occasionally not the bests decision but I try very hard not to feel guilt or shame over food choices. There are much more serious things to save that sort of energy for. Glad that you are getting help.
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
    hawaiifittness wrote: »
    I stayed under I guess that is progress

    Awesome job. Let the rest go.
  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
    Your not an idiot at all. Your a person who needs to seek help with your relationship with food, not an idiot.
    Please talk to your doctor and look for any other resources available to you. Maybe talk therapy or counseling could help you work through this.
  • AskTracyAnnK28
    AskTracyAnnK28 Posts: 2,817 Member
    Once you get into counseling your counselor will work with you so you'll have a better relationship with food. I've been there and I'm proud to be ED free since 2003. Feel free to add me as a friend if you'd like some support :)
  • LovingLife_Erin
    LovingLife_Erin Posts: 328 Member
    You are doing super great if you realise that you have an issue and are seeking help. You got this... keep focused on doing what your counselor/team says and know that you are stronger than your ED.
  • segacs
    segacs Posts: 4,599 Member
    The food doesn't make you want to cry. Your bulimia does.

    Good for you for seeing a doctor and seeking out help. That's the first step to getting healthy.

    There's tons of support out there to help you along. You aren't alone. You CAN do this.

    Best of luck to you.
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
    Because you're ill

    But you're taking steps to get better

    Good for you
  • kami3006
    kami3006 Posts: 4,979 Member
    You have a mental illness and, as with many of them, guilt is an unfortunate part of the cycle. It's wonderful that you're getting treatment. It takes courage to do so and you should be proud of that. I wish you all the best with your therapy!
  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
    livelovebbg wrote: »
    Having an eating disorder does not make you an idiot. You're doing the right thing by seeking medical attention. Best of luck.

    This. Good for you for taking steps to help yourself.
  • lgtijerina
    lgtijerina Posts: 53 Member
    You are NOT an idiot. If anything you are very smart because you realized that you might have a problem with food and you are now seeking to get help. Those two steps are the hardest. Wishing you the best of luck with your therapy.
  • Kalikel
    Kalikel Posts: 9,603 Member
    No, food shouldn't make anyone cry. People (fat and thin) cry over food a lot because their emotions have become all wrapped up in food. A good therapist can help you sort this all out.
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    hawaiifittness wrote: »
    But here I am 1 king sized reece's and 2 mini almond joys later bawling like a baby. Why do I feel such intense guilt over food? I am bulimic and I am going to my first doctor appointment about it later next week, but I can't get over this intense shame. I hate feeling like this but eat it anyways I am an idiot.
    Shame is a major part of bulimia. I'm glad you will be going to the doctor to get help. Group therapy with other bulimic was essential in my recovery.
  • hawaiifittness
    hawaiifittness Posts: 36 Member
    Thank you all so much for the support I am actually looking forward to treatment because I finally feel like this is a good step forward.
  • bri170lb
    bri170lb Posts: 1,375 Member
    hawaiifittness wrote: »
    I stayed under I guess that is progress

    Heck, yeah, it's progress! Hold on to every little victory! They all count and will someday lead to confidence in yourself. Let the rest go. Life's too short & precious to dwell on negativity.

    You stayed under, you rocked it. You can do it again next time too.

    Also...you are actively seeking help, here and with the doctor's appointment. VICTORY!

    I hope your appointment goes well. Let us know how it goes.






  • shadowfax_c11
    shadowfax_c11 Posts: 1,942 Member
    You are not an idiot. You have a mental health problem that is related to food. This is something amiss with your brain. it isn't your fault and it does not make you a bad person. The fact that you keep trying is amazing. You should be proud of that.

    It is okay to fall, to make mistakes and to fall. The important thing is that you never quit trying to get better. And for you that means professional help from someone trained in helping this kind of problem. You can't do it by yourself. No one can. Good for you for realising you need help and getting it. I know you will beat this. :)
  • teresadutton
    teresadutton Posts: 217 Member
    I also have an ED.....It was only about 6 months ago that I even came to realize I had a ED. About 2 months ago I sought help from my Dr. and a therapist and I truly accepted my issues and have been working on them like crazy. I am so much better today than I was 2 months ago, I still have a long way to go but so much better. You are headed in the right direction. Great job!!
  • catt952
    catt952 Posts: 190 Member
    teresadutton wrote: »
    I also have an ED.....It was only about 6 months ago that I even came to realize I had a ED. About 2 months ago I sought help from my Dr. and a therapist and I truly accepted my issues and have been working on them like crazy. I am so much better today than I was 2 months ago, I still have a long way to go but so much better. You are headed in the right direction. Great job!!

    teresa i know this is very personal but what made you come to realise you had an ED?
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    hawaiifittness wrote: »
    Thank you all so much for the support I am actually looking forward to treatment because I finally feel like this is a good step forward.

    Getting treatment is the best thing you can do to take care of yourself. It changed my life because it helped me get to the roof of my disorder.
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