so depressed I can't eat... just venting :(

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coliemarie1832
coliemarie1832 Posts: 10 Member
in Motivation and Support
basically me and this guy were in a serious relationship for a little over the year... we spend all our time together, he was always so so good to me. over the past few months we began to argue a lot of pointless things.. it came to the point where in this past October he said we should go on a break and work on ourselves so we can have a better relationship.. we went on our break which turned into a full break up because he said it wasn't fair to have me waiting around for him to decide if he wants to be in a relationship or not. we didn't speak for two weeks and then he ended up calling me telling me he misses me and loves me and really wants to see me and wants to make us work. this weekend we made plans to see each other, but today he told me he doesn't think we should anymore.. I asked why and he tells me how he hungout with a girl from work last night and they ended up doing things, aka having sex... I'm so hurt. I feel so betrayed, so broken.. he always told me that I need to trust him better and he would never do anything to hurt me.... well he did, he hurt me so bad.. I'm so depressed, I can't even eat... my parents took me and my best friend to dinner tonight and I could only take a few bites without feeling like I was going to throw up. my eyes hurt from crying. everytime the thought of him touching and kissing another girl crosses my mind I feel so weak and physically sick... when will this pain ever end?! and the worst of all is how much I still love him!

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  • coliemarie1832
    coliemarie1832 Posts: 10 Member
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    for a little over a year*** not the year
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,573 Member
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    I remember the same feeling. Yes, the pain will end.
  • sarahsunshine4
    sarahsunshine4 Posts: 15 Member
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    Oh honey affairs of the heart can be so cruel. But you WILL make it through this!
  • hekla90
    hekla90 Posts: 595 Member
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    You were broken up so I don't see how he betrayed you. In fact he contacted you to tell you about it which sounds pretty mature even though it hurts right now. Give it some time. If you are very emotionally bothered by this go see your doctor. My partner and I of 2 years split a few weeks ago and by the time I got to see my doctor I had lost about 12 lbs in 3 weeks. I just can't eat when I'm depressed or anxious and run to relieve stress but she gave me some Xanax and so I've been able to eat (and finally sleep I slept about 3 hours the first 4 days) a bit and gained a few lbs back. I was/am looking quite scary at the moment. Anyways, I'm all for drugging myself through the emotional pain until time has, well time to catch up and doing its own emotional numbing. Im not a very emotional person so when I do feel things it tends to be intolerable for me. Hang in there. It gets better I guess.
  • mingle287
    mingle287 Posts: 44 Member
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    He's playing and the girl from work. Don't give in into your fantasy that this can be worked out. He cheated on you so don't go back to him. Move on with your life. Don't let him pick and choose what woman he wants to be with for the night because chances are he's trying to sleep with both of. You regularly. He's a player. Be careful and good luck.

    This to shall pass! But if you stay with him if will never pass.
  • RoseTheWarrior
    RoseTheWarrior Posts: 2,035 Member
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    It hurts, and that stinks. We've all been in your shoes. Please take the advice here and just move on. As soon as he said he wanted "a break", it was over. Delete his number. Don't answer his calls or texts. It will just prolong the inevitable. Maybe you want to hear something different, but that's the truth. You can do MUCH better.
  • mysteps2beauty
    mysteps2beauty Posts: 493 Member
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    Been there. It hurts.
    He picked a fight with you to break up.
    He got back together with you even though he had obviously gained a relationship in that two weeks with girl from work.

    He wants his cake and eat it too.
    He moved on. It cannot be repaired. The trust is gone and can never go back. The only reason to work on it would be if you took vows aka marriage or had children. Even then the trust would still never return to the level you had.
    Best thing to do is move on. You seem young, so know there are other fish in sea, and quiet a few who are better than him. Your heart will repair it's brokeness, but give it time.
  • tmptina
    tmptina Posts: 72 Member
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    Yes the pain will end, it just takes time to heal. Be good to yourself and let it go. <3
  • riffraff2112
    riffraff2112 Posts: 1,757 Member
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    It would be easier to cut someone loose when they do something like that. I think "you ain't the person I thought" and move on.
    Plenty of fish in the sea dear, and you deserve better.
  • Living360
    Living360 Posts: 223 Member
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    It's hard to believe now but you're lucky he did it before you "got back together". Knowing he was going to see you and then being with another woman shows his true character. I was in long term "love" relationships twice before I met my husband at age 29. In March we will be married 30 years. This is a learning process and most of us go through something similar before finding our life mates. Have a good cry, then look head and keep busy. Lean on your family and friends. This to shall pass. When feeling blue remember what a stinker he was.
  • vespiquenn
    vespiquenn Posts: 1,455 Member
    edited November 2015
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    We gave all been. Trusted us when we say that the pain will pass. A guy I was engaged to and dated for 6 years decided he no longer wanted to be together. It stung, I was miserable, but here I am happy with the man of my dreams now. It's a cheesy saying, but true - time heals all.
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
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    The worst thing is to persist in playing the game of what might have been. Yes, breaking up hurts and the best thing you can do us feel your feelings.

    The fact tat you aren't covering them up by eating is a good sign.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,663 Member
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    It may not be your first. Some people have to go through many relationships to find the right one that REALLY clicks. Time heals wounds. Just don't end up moping around cause it doesn't help you. Engage in things that will either help you mentally or physically improve. I hear Zumba is a great class for females to kick it together and just dance for exercise and fun.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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