Anybody embarassed to admit they are trying to lose weight?

I appear to be a confident person..... I don't talk about needing to lose weight. But I am hurting inside and really wanting to lose weight like so many of you are. I can't bring myself to include a picture of myself and am contemplating using a body pic without my head. I haven't told my husband that I'm using this site. Once in a while I break down and tell him I feel fat, want to lose weight, but for the most part I don't talk about it. I have never brought it up to my friends... come from a small town so don't even want to inclue that info..... Oh my is anybody else embarassed? I feel like if I wasn't I could get more support from friends, family, co-workers, etc. Gosh.... At the same time I am almost (strangely) excited to take on this challenge and lose weight. I have been eating really well for about 6 weeks although I didn't weigh myelf until a couple days ago so not sure what my starting weight was. Anyway, I'm rambling but want friends at MFP :)

Replies

  • brillmer87
    brillmer87 Posts: 1,977 Member
    There is nothing to be embarrassed about. Accepting the fact that you want to better yourself and live a happier and healthier lifestyle is something to embrace and be proud of. Not the other way around. :)
  • vczK2t
    vczK2t Posts: 309 Member
    edited November 2015
    I am not embarrassed about wanting to lose weight, and I am open with my husband about my struggles. He doesn't understand my struggles (he thinks i can just change my ways without making mistakes. LOL)
    My husband, for the most part, is very supportive of my efforts and encourages me as much as possible. He wants me to be happy and healthy. I am SURE your husband also wants you to be happy and healthy.
    I am only embarrassed that I have been trying for the better parts of 12 years and haven't succeeded in keeping any of it off.
  • Comforteater15
    Comforteater15 Posts: 19 Member
    Hey don't be embarrassed about wanting to make yourself better I've sent u a fr
  • mxchana
    mxchana Posts: 666 Member
    I wouldn't say I feel embarrassed that I want to lose weight, but I definitely have a strong sense of privacy when it comes to my weight loss journey. I don't comment on the appearance of others unless they speak about it first. When people compliment me on my weight loss I say thank you and change the subject. If anyone asks me how much I've lost I just say "quite a bit" and change the subject. It's definitely not something I want to discuss! And, as you see, I don't have a lot of pictures on this site.

    I think people are all too quick to judge and to comment about how we look and what we eat. It's really none of their business.

    I do appreciate the support of my fellow weight-loss warriors on this site, including the anonymity that goes along with it. Best of luck in your journey!
  • joinn68
    joinn68 Posts: 480 Member
    I kind of get that: I don't want to talk about wanting to lose weight and stuff because I feel it's very personal. You've started using MFP so as long as you keep to it you are on the right track. You'll be making small changes. It might not be noticeable to people around you. And from discussions around it seems if you are quite heavy you can lose like 20 to 30 lbs before people even start to notice. I hope after you've lost 30 you'll have found a way to handle the inevitable questions without feeling embarrassed.
  • thingeringer
    thingeringer Posts: 241 Member
    Personal experiences only - I have lost about a ton of weight in my lifetime and my friends and family have heard about every diet under the sun and how this new program was going to change my life. And then I would regain the weight. So when I started MFP, I was pretty quiet about it. I didn't tout it as a miracle cure or tell everyone I was making major changes. In fact, I didn't make major changes. I just ate a bit less and moved a bit more and recorded it all. I used the MFP community to obsess about calories and work outs but mostly tried to spare my friends. After losing almost 50 pounds and keeping it off for several years, I still don't talk about it much out in the world. If someone says I look good, I say, 'thank you, - love that blouse you're wearing,' and the conversation shifts from me. I did this initially because I was sure I would fail but now it has just become a habit. I'm proud of my success but it turns out that I've been pretty happy keeping the focus off my eating habits.

    Bottom line, of course, is that you get to choose whatever works best for you. This site has been a Godsend to me. I hope it is helpful to you. Good luck.
  • pondee629
    pondee629 Posts: 2,469 Member
    I "admit" that I'm trying to lose weight when asked (maybe). I don't volunteer the information. People ask, some out of curiosity, some worry I'm sick. Some ask how. Some merely offer a platitude. It's my body, my decision, I'll tell you what I want, when I want. And if I don't, I won't. It's not embarrassment, it's privacy. If I want you to know, I'll tell you. If I think I need you to help me, I'll ask. If I think that you'll be of no help, I won't.

    You do what you feel you need to do to be successful. The rest can...

    Keep on going. No need to be embarrassed. Every reason to keep your private life private.
  • motterotter
    motterotter Posts: 701 Member
    The first rule of fat club is we do not talk about fat club
    You have to accept that you are not just a number on a scale or a pant size or whatever makes you embarassed
    Its hard to lose weight as it is without beating yourself up emotionally about having to lose weight dont get so fussed about weight its not a judgement on your character
    If you think about your body and mind together holistically you need nourishment and rest and exercise for both body mind and spirit give yourself a break and dont think about how embarassed you are to lose weight instead think about Brad Pitt being tyler durden in that red leather jacket isn't that much much better ?

  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    I always looked at it as becoming healthier and more fit with this nice added bonus of losing excess weight...I always have viewed this as betterment of myself. I've been in maintenance for over 2.5 years now, and I still seek to be healthier and more fit...I still seek to better myself and I don't find anything particularly embarrassing about that.

    The only thing I felt embarrassed about early on was how far I had let myself go...I was always a pretty healthy, active, fit person until age 30 when I graduated and took a desk job and piled on about 50 Lbs over 8 years. I knew things were not great as I was a 2-3 PAD smoker and got winded walking my dog around the block...but it was some really nasty blood work that I got back a few years ago that made me realize I needed to get my *kitten* together. At the time, I had a new born and a 2 y.o. and my doctor basically asked me if I wanted to be around and healthy to watch them grow to become men...and if so, I needed to get my act together...so here I am.
  • OhMsDiva
    OhMsDiva Posts: 1,073 Member
    mxchana wrote: »
    I wouldn't say I feel embarrassed that I want to lose weight, but I definitely have a strong sense of privacy when it comes to my weight loss journey. I don't comment on the appearance of others unless they speak about it first. When people compliment me on my weight loss I say thank you and change the subject. If anyone asks me how much I've lost I just say "quite a bit" and change the subject. It's definitely not something I want to discuss! And, as you see, I don't have a lot of pictures on this site.

    I think people are all too quick to judge and to comment about how we look and what we eat. It's really none of their business.

    I do appreciate the support of my fellow weight-loss warriors on this site, including the anonymity that goes along with it. Best of luck in your journey!

    I am not embarrassed either, but I don't talk about it unless someone asks me what I am doing. It used to be hard for me to even take a compliment when someone noticed that I had lost weight. My sister always tell me to be positive and accept compliments and that is what I have done. I only recently told my mom and my sister how much I have lost. Other than that I do not speak on it.
  • rezgrl
    rezgrl Posts: 7 Member
    Never feel bad about wanting to do something for yourself. It took me a long time to feel comfortable in my skin.
  • KimmieCapone
    KimmieCapone Posts: 46 Member
    I am. I don't talk to my husband about it, he doesn't know I'm using the app either. I'm the 'fat' girl at the office, my boss is an avid runner and my other two coworkers are naturally thin. I feel like if I talk about it and then fail, everyone will know...
  • lorengetsfit
    lorengetsfit Posts: 84 Member
    I used to be embarrassed to discuss weight loss. I never told my friends or family when I was trying to lose weight...and all of those times, I failed. It wasn't until I shared my goals with my friends and family that I was able to lose weight and keep it off. What changed was that I was ready to actual commit myself to my goals and because of that, I was able to tell others. I think that it's completely natural to be excited about weight loss! Weight loss is incredibly transformative, so let that inspire you and push you forward.
  • gramarye
    gramarye Posts: 586 Member
    I feel like if I talk about it and then fail, everyone will know...

    Pretty much this when I started, yes. I didn't want to talk a big game, and then have to put on a brave face when I (inevitably) *kitten* up.

    Except I did not *kitten* up, and learned to take care of myself in a whole way, rather than looking at myself as some work in progress. It took me a while, but I'm very honest with my partner about how I'm doing, if I'm struggling, and am pleased by his supportive but not pushy involvement as I slowly try to get to my goal weight.

    And I absolutely preened publicly when I hit the 100 pounds lost mark. I never thought I'd get there, and it was a moment for me.

    Teal deer: it gets easier when you start to feel more assured of yourself and the process. But it's also okay to choose privacy. Everyone tackles it in a different way.
  • rodneytracy
    rodneytracy Posts: 182 Member
    You shouldn't be embarrassed for wanting to loose weight you should be proud of yourself for wanting to better yourself
  • rodneytracy
    rodneytracy Posts: 182 Member
    You can also add me if you like
  • readmysexymind
    readmysexymind Posts: 12 Member
    Add me
  • rodneytracy
    rodneytracy Posts: 182 Member
    I am. I don't talk to my husband about it, he doesn't know I'm using the app either. I'm the 'fat' girl at the office, my boss is an avid runner and my other two coworkers are naturally thin. I feel like if I talk about it and then fail, everyone will know...

    The only way you can fail is if you give up. We all have our good days and our bad days with our diets. Just remember if you have a bad day tomorrow is a new day. Don't let the past get in your way of accomplishing your goal.
  • I'm kind of the same way! My partner's the only one who knows. It would be hard for him to miss, with me demanding that we cook instead of order takeout all the time. :) But at work, with friends, etc., I don't volunteer the information. I don't know if I'd say I'm embarrassed, exactly, but I do feel like it's my business and not theirs.

    I also know that as soon as someone says they're trying to lose weight at the office, everyone else jumps all over them at holiday parties about not eating the treats available. My willpower is thin enough as it is; I don't need outside voices fraying it further.
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,573 Member
    When I was quite overweight and trying, I didn't really advertise it to friends or make a big deal about it with my boyfriend. Once I made it to a healthy weight range I was more comfortable and open though. Now I just don't care. I'll tell whoever how much I weigh and what I'm doing if they ask.
  • MissMinor1
    MissMinor1 Posts: 1 Member
    I know how you feel! You're not alone!
  • firebloom
    firebloom Posts: 109 Member
    I actually never told anyone that I was losing weight for the same reasons. I've now lost 31kg (68lbs) and people definitely noticed so I just acknowledge it when people notice. It's not something that I felt the need to bring up on my own.
  • malioumba
    malioumba Posts: 132 Member
    Absolutely. It's very embarrassing.

    I definitely don't talk about, and if it's brought up, I change the subject.

    If you don't want to put up a picture on MFP, don't put up a picture. This is the internet, everything you put up will stay up, so think twice about putting anything up.
  • oceangirl99
    oceangirl99 Posts: 161 Member
    Thanks everybody. It is nice to know I'm not alone and it is also nice for the reminder that I should be proud of this journey I'm headed on. I've tried MFP before, but only used it for calorie counting. I haven't used the friend network or engaged in discussions before and I think since I am so private about this subject, this is a great way for me to have discussions and to get support. I love hearing perspectives from a variety of people. Those who are starting out like me, those who have come so far, and those who have met their goals, those who have learned to love their bodies and those who have not yet.
    Another thing that embarasses me is 6 years ago I ran 2 marathons and 2 1/2 marathons in one year..... I'm proud that I was able to do that, but if I ever tell somebody new I immediately see their eyes check out my body in disbelief. Oh well...... it's a process and I'll get there again.
  • ReflectivePhase
    ReflectivePhase Posts: 17 Member
    before I started, yes but now during my journey I'm happy to tell anyone how much I've lost and I'm proud to be on my way to a fitter and healthier me.
  • tara_means_star
    tara_means_star Posts: 957 Member
    I've had moments of extreme embarrassment...especially when I think someone is bigger than me and find out I weight a lot more than they do. Or my mother tells random strangers that I'm on a diet (I'm married and 25 for Pete's sake...WHY???) I feel braver on here though because there are so many other people just like me who are trying to lose weight. I feel more confident in telling people my starting weight, my current weight, my goal weight even with my picture on here. I might be that brave to do in my everyday life, but on here it's different.
  • If you decide that you want to better yourself then it is amazing. Just believe in yourself. I know you can be successful if you put your mind to it.
  • amandanicole90a
    amandanicole90a Posts: 34 Member
    brillmer87 wrote: »
    There is nothing to be embarrassed about. Accepting the fact that you want to better yourself and live a happier and healthier lifestyle is something to embrace and be proud of. Not the other way around. :)

    Exactly this!!!
  • anl90
    anl90 Posts: 928 Member
    I have found MFP to be one of the most accepting and supportive communities I have ever came across. This has seriously been one of the best things to ever happen to me, so please don't feel ashamed around us! Everyone here has been so welcoming and inspiring, so just try to at least open up to us - it's what this is for. We are here to motive - not judge! Feel free to add me if you need a friend. :)

    Best wishes! xoxo
  • OneHundredToLose
    OneHundredToLose Posts: 8,523 Member
    There's not enough time in life to waste it being embarrassed.