Advice needed from people please.

I'm 49. I used to self-medicate with food. Now, I use exercise, both regularly and to self-soothe. I get a better high and don't feel guilty afterwards I also had therapy. Cognitive Behavioral techniques were especially helpful.

I've battled with depression on and off for decades, and it can be really hard to exercise when I'm depressed. But I force myself to just start, and give myself permission to stop if I need to (I never do.)

That has always been me. I am clinically depressed, and was once diagnosed as manic depressant, but that diagnosis is no longer. I ate out of depression, would get fatter, would eat because I was depressed about that. I was a "tomorrow" person, and still kind of am. I would be a shut in, also, or tried to be. I had to force myself out, because I knew that I would regret not going to functions if I stayed home. The whole time, every time, I would get such bad anxiety that everyone was looking at me and laughing. What motivated me was a biggest loser contest at work, because money was involved. I am very competitive, esp when it's to do with money. I did great using this site, then I decided to start walking due to everyone here saying "move more". I used my dog as the motivator, because she and I were both much thinner(she's not fat, or in danger of her weight, but was heavier) when we lived in Germany. So I used everything else as an excuse to do better, it literally became an obsession, and here I am. 41-42lbs down. OP, if you have a dog, or even if you don't start walking. I was dying after like a half mile, but I have foot problems. The more I went(4-6 nights a week), the longer I would go for. It took like 3 weeks for me to get a legit mile, but you can do it! I bought a food scale, even though I was doing well with eyeballing, but I knew I would need to get used to it anyways, so I started when I really didn't need to.

You're very welcome! I do highly recommend therapy, also. It helped me in the past, but I haven't been able to go back due to schedule conflicts, so I had just sailed by all chubby. I will always have these issues, but it makes me proud to get out of it myself! Although when I don't see results, I get so down. So very very down.

You need Dr. Phil.

I have also felt like this in the past, like there was no point in taking care of myself. Fortunately I managed to get on top of it, more or less, before I put on too much weight.

I went to see my doctor about how I was feeling, not necessarily about my weight. When I feel low, upset, unworthy, I eat. I eat whatever is near/feels good/etc, this would usually be chocolate or a takeaway of some sort! He suggested starting a diary, just for myself, so that I can write down how I was feeling. This really helped. For me, I had to start looking at my feelings etc before I considered changes to food etc. I also read up a little bit on mindfulness and CBT therapy. I also got a few adult colouring books and puzzle books. Whenever I was feeling a little bit rubbish I'd do one of these and slowly the habit of grabbing food has lifted. There are still days where all I can think about is food, but I'm much more in control now than I've ever been.

I started then making small changes, when I felt ready. Things like drinking more water, going for 3 walks a week, making at least one meal from scratch per week and eating more fruit and veg and just built up from there.

Good luck! One step at a time