Help..feeling defeated..getting maried in 2 months

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kbean33
kbean33 Posts: 50
in Motivation and Support
Well...I started my weightloss journey with MFP September 20th, and I have lost around 25lbs. To reach my goal weight, I need to loose 30 more lbs. I am not expecting by any means to reach my goal weight by my wedding, but I am sliding backwards and have gained back 7lbs. I feel like I am going crazy! The past month has been aweful! I cannot get a hold of my eating or stick to my exersize regimine. I keep starting over every day, and I cannot get a hold of it. Going CRAZZY! Please help. I see so many people on here who are amazing and stick to it and loose tons of weight. I was an Althete in another life, but now I am just looking to get healthy and feel good.

any advise....????

Replies

  • ckncj
    ckncj Posts: 183 Member
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    Keep your chin up! Set mini goals for yourself - even if they are daily goals - but keep your main goal in sight, too. For example, when I feel myself slipping, I will set a mini-goal to not eat cheese or sweets...one day at a a time. (and even that is difficult). Be realistic with yourself and your mini goals and you can do it!!!

    Congrats on the upcoming wedding, too!
  • Griffin90
    Griffin90 Posts: 64 Member
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    Just do it. There is no trick. You see food eat what you need and that is it. It is hard but the rewards are worth it.
  • Kelly_Wilson1990
    Kelly_Wilson1990 Posts: 3,245 Member
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    Do you eat when you are stressed? Try reaching for fresh veggies and avoid fast food. YOU CAN DO TI!!!!!
  • sandyfeet10
    sandyfeet10 Posts: 280 Member
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    eating low carb has been really good for me and i saw results immediately! maybe you can try that before the wedding? friend me and we can do it together!

    i was a chubby bride, but i look back at the pics and see how happy i looked, not how chubby i looked.

    hang in there and congrats on your wedding!!!
  • allysabee
    allysabee Posts: 123
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    I do that all the time too.. What I try to do when I'm tempted with a delicious, high cal, high fat food is just think to yourself before you make the decision to put it in your mouth - "do I need this? how bad am I going to feel after I eat this? how much will I regret eating this once it's gone?" then think to yourself - "how proud am I going to be of myself in 20 minutes when I DIDN'T eat this?".

    It's actually really helped me in making better choices. No taste or pleasure you get from food will EVER feel as good as you'll feel once you lose all the weight and people start to compliment you and really take notice of all your hard work. When I'm offered something unhealthy, I fight with myself for a second but then I say no and I feel great about it once it's out of my sight. It makes me feel powerful and in control and like I'm really serious about this!

    Hope that helps! Good luck :) I'm sure you will look beautiful on your wedding day, regardless.
  • MiniMichelle
    MiniMichelle Posts: 807 Member
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    bump
  • SLaw4215
    SLaw4215 Posts: 596 Member
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    Please feel free to add me! I'm no shrink but it sounds like your nerves are starting to get to you. You may need your exercise routines to release stress! I don't know if I'd be any help to you but I'm certainly willing to give it a try
  • kdrew11
    kdrew11 Posts: 363 Member
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    You just need to stay really focused on your goal. I am getting married in 6 weeks and I know that if I'm was in my dress at the same weight as when I started this it may be the only thing I'd regret about my wedding day in years to come. It all depends where you need to be to be happiest. Set yourself realistic goals. 30 lbs may be too much to aim for in 2 months so maybe aim for 10lbs to a stone. If you set unrealistic goals you'll be less likely to stick at it cos you know you won't get there. 10lbs to a stone will make a hell of a lot of difference to your appearance and will give you so much more confidence too. Try measuring yourself now and then after 2 months and you'll be amazed how many inches you'll lose. Don't be disheartened and give up if you don't lose one week just persevere and it WILL come off!

    Good luck. You can do it! :happy:
  • brneydgrlie
    brneydgrlie Posts: 464 Member
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    You might want to open your diary so we can see it. Maybe there are some "trigger foods" in there that are making you crave things that are not so healthy.

    Are you drinking enough water? Watching your sodium? High sodium can cause water retention and weight gain.

    Also, are you eating all your allotted calories - even your exercise ones? If not, that can cause binge eating, which would be your body's way of trying to send you a message.
  • hlavers
    hlavers Posts: 32
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    Deep breath in....aannnd....release....

    You sound like an emotional eater (like myself) and my best advise is to take it slowly, one day at a time. Instead of binging go for a walk, throw out any tempting foods (you won't eat what's not there), make each day one choice at a time - oatmeal v.s. bagel and cream cheese, (veggies and dip v.s. Donut, etc., make a decision to just do it.

    You are stronger than the cravings and YOU CAN DO IT!!

    Also don't let one bad decision ruin your day. Stray and have a chocolate at lunch? Still cook and eat a healthy meal at dinner, and if you've gotten out of the habit of packing a lunch prep one before bedtime and there's no excuse not to pack something (healther and cheaper).
  • jmruef
    jmruef Posts: 824 Member
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    First: Breathe. You've got a lot going on in your life right now.

    Still breathing? In *and* out, right? (Seriously, when I'm stressed I forget the "out" part and wind up hyperfentilating. It's not cool.)

    I notice that you said "weight loss journey." I love it! That means you know that this isn't something you just DO and it's done - it's a lifestyle thing. Forever. For better, for worse...hey, that sounds familiar. ;)

    This is just one of the "for worse" parts. It will pass. Forgive yourself. If you can do one little thing each day (as opposed to trying to do EVERYTHING) to get yourself back on track - that's a victory. So when you wake up tomorrow, before you even get out of bed - plan on one thing you can do for yourself. Will it be taking a walk? Drinking an extra glass of water? Skipping a treat that will help your stress level but not the extra pounds you don't want to gain back? Or better yet, plan it tonight and write it down on a piece of paper you can put by your bed so you'll see it when you wake up tomorrow.

    Everyone's got their weak points on this journey. Read the "What is your vice" thread if you want proof. It's a process and no one's got it perfect right from the get-go.

    Still breathing? Just checkin'. ;)

    You can do this. You can do this. You can SO do this.
  • vegout2
    vegout2 Posts: 14
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    try rewarding yourself with non food based treats - simple stuff like a bubble bath using an expensive bath creme, having a date at the movies or treating yourself to a good book or even a coffee and catch up with your mates. Stop beating yourself up and try writing down why you were trying to lose the weight in the first place. Sometimes that simple act of commiting our reasons down on paper and then displaying them where everyone can see them helps to focus the mind.
  • kbean33
    kbean33 Posts: 50
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    Thanks for all of your posts. I will set mini goals, and try to forget about what I did before today. I have accomplished many hard things in my life, but this is by far the hardest! I will do more self talk, when I want to go "off plan"
  • FatUncleRob
    FatUncleRob Posts: 341
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    I'd say you're going through a stressful period in your life (hopefully FUN, but stressful nonetheless) so don't be too hard on yourself. :flowerforyou:

    Try to make sure that you are setting realistic goals for yourself.

    Try to set some time aside every day for some kind of exercise - even if it's just a walk. Try to forget about the wedding preparations completely while you exercise. It will help with the weight loss and with the stress.

    Remember that your ultimate goal is to lose weight and get healthier - there is no REAL deadline.... just try to get a bit better each day.
  • dls06
    dls06 Posts: 6,774 Member
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    You have to make the decision if you want to diet to lose some weight or if you want a healthy lifestyle. With a diet you are surely going to gain it all back and then some. With a lifestyle change it is slower but it is forever. If you loose 25 lbs a year, would that make you happy?
  • peggy1209
    peggy1209 Posts: 84 Member
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    if you are planning a wedding - you are probably SWAMPED. Instead of spending time at the gym for the next week, just try to really focus on getting your food right.

    Then, add exercise back in.

    Use the time to plan your meals well and complete some items from your wedding to do list.
  • blm625
    blm625 Posts: 33
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    Keep going! I know how stressful getting married is, I was trying to lose weight for my wedding and ended up going up a dress size from being soo stressed out about loseing weight and eve rything else! (luckly they had the size in stock and it fit perfect no alterations!) The best advice I can give you is to track your calories and work out and don't over stress about making your goal by wedding date. Personally being stressed out on a weight loss goal back fires... but I know if I take it easy and not over stress I do ALOT better at it. Gettting married is stressful so take it easy, and good luck!
  • TeslaJoule
    TeslaJoule Posts: 62 Member
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    Congrats on losing the first 25! That's a huge accomplishment! Don't downplay that, THAT'S AWESOME!!!!!:smile:

    As for going backwards, think about it this way. The person you're marrying isn't marrying you because you lost that last 30 pounds. Your family and friends aren't going to your wedding for some magic transformation. They're all there because they LOVE YOU! They love you for you and they love that you've found love!

    I got married last summer, so I totally understand. The last minute stuff, the pressure to look your best, I get it. The fact of the matter is, you ARE going to look your best on your wedding because you're happy.

    Don't sabotage your self-esteem on YOUR BIG DAY by not eating right and not going to the gym. You'll regret it. Just do the best that you can EVERYDAY. If that means parking farther away and walking a little extra, good! If that means saying no to the cake, fine! If that means taking the dog for an extra walk, great! Just do your best with what you can. Focus on what you're doing right. (LIKE THAT FIRST 25! WOOT!) That way you won't have regret.

    I've also heard that getting a trainer is well worth the cost. That way you'll feel obligated to go and you have someone to push you....just throwing that out there.

    YOU CAN AND WILL BE THE MOST LOVELY BRIDE YOU CAN BE!

    Feel free to message me if you want. I 110% understand.
  • mrmarler
    mrmarler Posts: 121 Member
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    You can do this! I once had a trainer that told me when I was getting down to think of how good it will feel when you reach that goal, visualize yourself reaching it, imagine the sence of accomplishment and allow yourself to feel those feelings. It helps me to stay focussed and remember we all slip up from time to time, just as long as we get our footing and keep going.
  • xXsweetMiseryXx
    xXsweetMiseryXx Posts: 22 Member
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    My biggest piece of advice??? FIND SOMEONE TO DO IT WITH YOU!! My momma and I started this whole journey a month ago, and just recently had to workout alone. It's SOO much harder and drags on when I'm by myself, but when we're doing it together we can talk and laugh about stuff and I feel more obligated to make every move count because I know she's doing the same. It also helps me to know that she can look at my food diary and hold me accountable for the choices I make. You can do this hun! I'm getting married next weekend and I feel your pain lol

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