Overwhelmed! How to work toward fitness goals when you have nonstop demands on your time?
ShannonE74
Posts: 8 Member
I am a single mom and have to sit at a desk most of the time at work. When I get home my kids are so needy and the house is so messy I find it very difficult to fit in any exercise. I also get so stressed I end up fixing the absolute easiest and fastest thing I can come up with for supper half the time and then struggle with stress eating after the kids are in bed and I'm too exhausted to do anything else.
I rarely have time alone and mornings are already a huge struggle without trying to add exercise to the mix. It feels impossible to be able to stick to anything. Does anyone else struggle like this? Any suggestions or do I just have to wait until my kids are older and there are fewer demands on me? I really want to get in shape and be healthier now.
I rarely have time alone and mornings are already a huge struggle without trying to add exercise to the mix. It feels impossible to be able to stick to anything. Does anyone else struggle like this? Any suggestions or do I just have to wait until my kids are older and there are fewer demands on me? I really want to get in shape and be healthier now.
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Replies
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Do you have a lunch break? Is it possible for you to walk then?
Do you have a friend who you can swap looking after children with or favours? They look after your children two or three times a week while you exercise you do the same for them?
How old are your children? Can you use playing with them as exercise? They ride bikes or scooters while you walk or kick/dribble a ball about?0 -
Hi. I am in the same exact situation. I can completely relate to your struggles. I'm here trying to find some type of motivation as well.0
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Try being active in small increments . . . park in the farthest stall, take the stairs, walk for five or ten minutes. Not sure where you live so weather may be a factor. With the kids you can jump rope, hula hoop, have a silly dance party or even play Simon Says. You'll be spending time with them, giving them needed attention, exercising and having fun. Once they are done instead of mindless eating login to MFP and read others stories, respond to comments etc. One small step each day can bring you closer to your goals. Don't wait until you're kids are older. It will be some time before you have fewer demands. You can do something now. Asking for suggestions today and wanting to get in shape and be healthier now is your 1st non-scale victory. You can do this!0
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It's *better* to exercise and it's great if you can fit it in somehow (especially with the kids), at least on the weekends, but you don't *need* to exercise to lose. If dedicated workout time would be hard, it would be good to focus on the food side.
The easy things are usually low-protein, high carb, in my experience, and that doesn't always fill everyone up. If that's true for you, what about batch-cooking meat on a Sunday and freezing it to eat through the week?
There are also some lighter lines of frozen food that are still filling. If there's a chance you're in Canada, this line of products is great for that. You could get a pizza or some easy chicken or fish options, and make a side of veggies.
Are any of your kids old enough to start helping out, just a bit, like with putting their toys away? (I'm not a parent, no idea how hard or easy this would be to get them to do
) Or what about having a rethink about storage, so at least that part is easier? 0 -
You can lose weight without exercising. Walk with your kids or play with them. Count calories and log every bite.
Can you work out for 30 min before the kids get up. Workout DVDs are great for squeezing that before work workout in. You'll also creAte the habit to without daily before work.0 -
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fiddletime wrote: »You can lose weight without exercising. Walk with your kids or play with them. Count calories and log every bite.
Can you work out for 30 min before the kids get up.
This. I'm not sure how much you think you need to exercise, but don't feel like you have to work out every day for an hour or more - 30 minutes is more than enough if you're working out hard. You should be creating your calorie deficit primarily by eating less, while moving more to supplement it.
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How old are your kids? What do you do at the weekends? Do you have any childcare options (if your kids are young)?
I'm not a single mum, but my husband works shifts, and every other week he's on late shift, so not home until around 10:30pm, so I do spend a lot of time on my own with our kids, who are 6, 4 and 20 months.
I work 4 days a week as a teacher, so I'm quite lucky in that I do tend to easily get 10,000 steps in! However, if you get a lunch break, could you go for a walk? When I worked in an office years ago I always went for a walk at lunch time. I get 35 mins for lunch now, and usually work through it.
I make sure I'm really organised for food, especially when my husband's on late shift as after finishing work, meeting, then collecting the kids from after school club and nursery, it's usually about 5:45pm. We often just have a piece of chicken/fish, and some veg which I do in the microwave. The kids eat a proper lunch at school/nursery so they don't need loads. Sometimes I'll make them a tuna sandwich and I'll have tuna salad, or we'll have scrambled egg.
On my husband's late shift week I do usually go to the gym twice after work when we don't have a meeting, as I can fit that in before collecting the kids, but I suppose I'm lucky as a teacher that I finish at 3, and I know not everyone can do that. On his early shift week it's easier as he's there in the evening so I can work out loads.
I also make sure I take the kids out at the weekend. My big two got bikes for Xmas, and my little one has a scooter now.
As for tidying... When I realised I couldn't do it all, I hired a cleaner! Obviously she can't do everything, but it's nice just once a week to come home to a tidy flat!0 -
First off - sounds like you are a little tough on yourself. Don't compromise sleep. Make small, consistent changes- drink more water, eat fresh fruit daily. Organization is simpler when you have less things- so get rid of stuff if you can. If you can be active with your kids that would be great. Precooking meals that stretch is a good idea. Eat more protein.0
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It doesn't take more time or effort to eat smaller portions!0
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Can you prep/freeze your food ahead of time? Or make it a family thing to work out with your kids? My four year old loves doing the Insanity DVDs with me. After about 10-15 minutes she's worn out and ends up going to her room to play which gives me the chance to work out in peace. I think you'll find you have more energy once you get into a routine too, as exercising daily has increased my stamina and energy levels. Good luck though- it's never easy with kids lol0
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tiptoethruthetulips wrote: »Do you have a lunch break? Is it possible for you to walk then?
Do you have a friend who you can swap looking after children with or favours? They look after your children two or three times a week while you exercise you do the same for them?
How old are your children? Can you use playing with them as exercise? They ride bikes or scooters while you walk or kick/dribble a ball about?
Thank you. Yes, I have a 30 minute lunch break and I might be able to walk some on nice days and close my door for squats or something on cold days.
I do not have anyone I can trade childcare with but I do try to go for walks with my kids when the weather is nice.
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Try being active in small increments . . . park in the farthest stall, take the stairs, walk for five or ten minutes. Not sure where you live so weather may be a factor. With the kids you can jump rope, hula hoop, have a silly dance party or even play Simon Says. You'll be spending time with them, giving them needed attention, exercising and having fun. Once they are done instead of mindless eating login to MFP and read others stories, respond to comments etc. One small step each day can bring you closer to your goals. Don't wait until you're kids are older. It will be some time before you have fewer demands. You can do something now. Asking for suggestions today and wanting to get in shape and be healthier now is your 1st non-scale victory. You can do this!
Thank you for the encouragement! I have had some success with working in small amounts of exercise whenever I can and counting calories. I lost 3 lbs in one week but failed to keep it up.
I like the idea of logging into MFP at night when I am tempted to stress eat - I think that may really work for me!
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While I'm not a single mother, my husband goes to work early and I get home late. The only time for me to work out without feeling I was compromising family time was to get up earlier to do it while my son is sleeping. I prep most meals for the week on Sunday so I don't have to cook when I get home every day. So I get up at 4:45-5:00 4 days a week to work out for 60-90 minutes (not required for everyone but for my current goals it is). Good luck!0
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DawnieB1977 wrote: »How old are your kids? What do you do at the weekends? Do you have any childcare options (if your kids are young)?
I'm not a single mum, but my husband works shifts, and every other week he's on late shift, so not home until around 10:30pm, so I do spend a lot of time on my own with our kids, who are 6, 4 and 20 months.
I work 4 days a week as a teacher, so I'm quite lucky in that I do tend to easily get 10,000 steps in! However, if you get a lunch break, could you go for a walk? When I worked in an office years ago I always went for a walk at lunch time. I get 35 mins for lunch now, and usually work through it.
I make sure I'm really organised for food, especially when my husband's on late shift as after finishing work, meeting, then collecting the kids from after school club and nursery, it's usually about 5:45pm. We often just have a piece of chicken/fish, and some veg which I do in the microwave. The kids eat a proper lunch at school/nursery so they don't need loads. Sometimes I'll make them a tuna sandwich and I'll have tuna salad, or we'll have scrambled egg.
On my husband's late shift week I do usually go to the gym twice after work when we don't have a meeting, as I can fit that in before collecting the kids, but I suppose I'm lucky as a teacher that I finish at 3, and I know not everyone can do that. On his early shift week it's easier as he's there in the evening so I can work out loads.
I also make sure I take the kids out at the weekend. My big two got bikes for Xmas, and my little one has a scooter now.
As for tidying... When I realised I couldn't do it all, I hired a cleaner! Obviously she can't do everything, but it's nice just once a week to come home to a tidy flat!
Thank you for all your suggestions! My kids are 22, 18, 10 & 3 - My 3 year old is actually the main stressor lol. He is a handful! I don't really have many options for childcare outside of work and don't like to leave them much on the weekends since I'm away at work all week but weekends are filled with cleaning, doing laundry, and running errands like grocery shopping etc.
I might be able to walk some on my lunch break at work or close the door to do squats etc. I can imagine you don't get much desk time at work0 -
Uh oh, some of my reply got lost when posting somehow.
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Thank you all for your replies! I don't have time to reapond to all but I will definitely try your suggestions0
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The only way to do something is to make it a priority. Priorities mean some things take precedence over others. It doesn't matter what it is. If it's not more important than something else you won't do it.
People who are at the gym or doing whatever fitness activity they decided to do regularly don't have more time than anyone else. They made a decision that it was important to them.0 -
I don't mean to sound harsh, but is there a reason that your older kids cannot watch after the younger ones a few times each week?
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Firstly, you'll never "find time" for exercise/fitness/health goals. You'll make time for it. It's what I learned, pretty soon into it.0
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ShannonE74 wrote: »I am a single mom and have to sit at a desk most of the time at work. When I get home my kids are so needy and the house is so messy I find it very difficult to fit in any exercise. I also get so stressed I end up fixing the absolute easiest and fastest thing I can come up with for supper half the time and then struggle with stress eating after the kids are in bed and I'm too exhausted to do anything else.
I rarely have time alone and mornings are already a huge struggle without trying to add exercise to the mix. It feels impossible to be able to stick to anything. Does anyone else struggle like this? Any suggestions or do I just have to wait until my kids are older and there are fewer demands on me? I really want to get in shape and be healthier now.ShannonE74 wrote: »I am a single mom and have to sit at a desk most of the time at work. When I get home my kids are so needy and the house is so messy I find it very difficult to fit in any exercise. I also get so stressed I end up fixing the absolute easiest and fastest thing I can come up with for supper half the time and then struggle with stress eating after the kids are in bed and I'm too exhausted to do anything else.
I rarely have time alone and mornings are already a huge struggle without trying to add exercise to the mix. It feels impossible to be able to stick to anything. Does anyone else struggle like this? Any suggestions or do I just have to wait until my kids are older and there are fewer demands on me? I really want to get in shape and be healthier now.ShannonE74 wrote: »I am a single mom and have to sit at a desk most of the time at work. When I get home my kids are so needy and the house is so messy I find it very difficult to fit in any exercise. I also get so stressed I end up fixing the absolute easiest and fastest thing I can come up with for supper half the time and then struggle with stress eating after the kids are in bed and I'm too exhausted to do anything else.
I rarely have time alone and mornings are already a huge struggle without trying to add exercise to the mix. It feels impossible to be able to stick to anything. Does anyone else struggle like this? Any suggestions or do I just have to wait until my kids are older and there are fewer demands on me? I really want to get in shape and be healthier now.
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I know sometimes it's hard to find time, you have to let something go, let the house stay messy one day, and play , dance with the kids, everyone has quality time together, u feel good about yourself and may find motivation to prep dinner or lunch the next day. Don't let a bad day turn into a bad week . Do ur best! We are all here with a common goal and challenges! Best of luck to you0
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Im a single mom too who also works and is in school full time. So totally get where u are coming from. I joined my local YMCA so that when i work out the kids can swim or play. They also have child care there for younger kids. When i dont feel like going i exercise with the kids by making it a game. We make obstacle courses in the basement and try to beat eachothers times or dance to music! Make it fun! Good luck!
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