Blended Families

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I am Mexican and my boyfriend is Black. As you can imagine our families make the most delicious yet fattening foods everrr. Every week we have Sunday dinner and this weekend will be the first weekend we're going over while being on the health kick. I am TERRIFIED I'm going to cave in and just pig out, especially when my in laws are always telling me, "Your so skinny. You need to fatten up more". My father in law already kinda gets insulted when I don't have much on my plate. Any suggestions on how I should go about this? Should I just focus on portion control? HELP!

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  • bogwoppt1
    bogwoppt1 Posts: 159 Member
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    Fill your plate with vegetables. If fresh vegetables are not normally part of the meal then make a point to bring them. A huge dish of roast veg is very low calorie and very filling. A huge green salad, with a low cal dressing, can fill a whole plate.
  • Merkavar
    Merkavar Posts: 3,082 Member
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    Unless they hold you down and force feed you they have no power.

    Just eat what you want. Eat with in your deficit, eat over your calorie goal, just make sure it's your choice either way.

    Maybe look at your calories as a weekly budget, go over with the family get together and be a bit under the days surrounding it.

    Do some extra exercise.

  • kiddiebqueen17
    kiddiebqueen17 Posts: 100 Member
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    bogwoppt1 wrote: »
    Fill your plate with vegetables. If fresh vegetables are not normally part of the meal and then make a point to bring them. A huge dish of roast veg is very low calorie and very filling. A huge green salad, with a low cal dressing, can fill a whole plate.

    I don't think bringing your own food is a good idea. That will just insult them.

    Obviously, try to control your food intake at the dinner but also think about the rest of the day. Eat/drink really low calories items like raw vegetables with water for breakfast and lunch. Put in a hard workout that day.

    Good luck!!!
  • ArmstrongSabrina
    ArmstrongSabrina Posts: 38 Member
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    Thank you everyone! I just don't want to offend them but I don't want to give them the power to make me feel guilty for not pigging out either. Definitely going to try and stay within my calorie goal for the day but if I do go over, I'll put in a hard workout that night like you all said. Appreciate the help!
  • bogwoppt1
    bogwoppt1 Posts: 159 Member
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    bogwoppt1 wrote: »
    Fill your plate with vegetables. If fresh vegetables are not normally part of the meal and then make a point to bring them. A huge dish of roast veg is very low calorie and very filling. A huge green salad, with a low cal dressing, can fill a whole plate.

    I don't think bringing your own food is a good idea. That will just insult them.


    Why? My family are always thrilled when I bring food, it means every one gets to eat more!!
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,464 Member
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    Ask if you can bring a new dish you tried. I appreciate that you don't want to offend them, but it's not ok for them to offend you by telling you how much to eat.
  • angelexperiment
    angelexperiment Posts: 1,917 Member
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    You can always discuss it with them and either you can bring something or they will attempt to accommodate you. Say hey I'm concerned about my health so I'm watching my intake very closely. My in laws were like oh ok and no hurt feelings!
  • ArmstrongSabrina
    ArmstrongSabrina Posts: 38 Member
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    lorrpb wrote: »
    Ask if you can bring a new dish you tried. I appreciate that you don't want to offend them, but it's not ok for them to offend you by telling you how much to eat.

    I think I put up with it for so long (I've been with my bf for 7yrs) that they thought I was okay with it. It wasn't until recently I started opening my mouth and would tell them as best I could that I was really full or I'm trying to lose weight. They are all on the thick side so for them to hear I'm trying to shed some lbs is a joke because I look so small compared to them. It's frustrating but I know my body more than them.
  • allaboutthefood
    allaboutthefood Posts: 781 Member
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    I say enjoy your Sunday dinners, if you want a healthier choice, you can bring something put it on the table to share with everyone. Eat till you are full and than stop. Some people save up calories for days like this, you can also do that if it's the calories you are worried about.
  • kathy0224
    kathy0224 Posts: 43 Member
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    My favorite line is "I get my cholesterol checked next month so I really have to watch what I eat."
  • namelesshere
    namelesshere Posts: 334 Member
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    Or you could say, "I'm really full right now, can I take some home for later. It is delish!"
  • victoria_1024
    victoria_1024 Posts: 915 Member
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    My mom cooks Sunday night dinners for us as well! It's always delicious and usually not healthy. I plan for it though and do a longer workout Sundays beforehand. I take a little bit of everything but try to watch portion sizes. My family is the opposite though where they will see me eat a cookie and say "I thought you were in a diet". I've been at this for a year now though so they're used to it. I figure one time a week of guesstimating calories and splurging a little won't hurt me in the long run.
  • ArmstrongSabrina
    ArmstrongSabrina Posts: 38 Member
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    That's a good way of looking at it @victoria_1024 ! I've heard of having a "cheat" day once a week so I figure that can be my day. I'm not going to go all crazy, still going to stick to my plan, but I'm not going to beat myself up if I go over on calories. Just going to put in an extra great workout after :)
  • tasaiar1
    tasaiar1 Posts: 79 Member
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    Haha I feel your pain, I have this with my in laws. I've started to eat a very low calorie breakfast or lunch if I know I'm going to be eating dinner at someone's house.

    Then I fill my plate with salad and or veg and a smaller portion of the actual meal. And the key is to eat slowly, so you can time yourself to finish your plate when they finish their.

    My in laws have seconds, this and maybe fourths so yh, it took a lot of practice to control my portion and speed. It helps that I have a toddler that I waste time with and feed as well :p
  • sblueyez
    sblueyez Posts: 156 Member
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    If it were me I would be sure to put a good workout in in the AM and also eat just a few hundred calories and maybe a snack depending on the time. Then I would go have a little bit of everything. Take your time eating. If not getting seconds will offend them then get seconds of the healthier items and nibble until they forgot about caring about what is on your plate. Then be sure to say how good the food was!

    Blended families are hard. My husband is from Nepal and his mom will go pick up the pot of lentils or whatever she made and just start dishing everyone seconds without even asking if we want more. I learned to start with a tiny portion on my first plate so I can eat from the seconds and not offend.