Excuses

I have been overweight all my life. I have always made excuses as to why I was this way; i.e. My family is all big, my depression, or Because I just don't have the time or any idea how to start.

I owe it to myself to better my life. I have let a lot of things take over my life, and now it's time for me to be in control, something I've never had. I am terrified that I am going to be one of those people that die because of my weight. I'm only 24 years old, and my knees ache and creak like that of a 70 year old. I'm scared that I'm not going to even make it to be 70 if I don't lose the weight. I'm scared to live my life, to be who I want to be, because I'm embarrassed of my weight and I live in constant fear of someone commenting about my weight.

In 2013, I finally beat my desire to kill myself, after almost dying from an overdose on antidepressants and other medication. I realized then that I needed to change something or I wasn't going to be able to stay alive. Now I am realizing that the binge eating and bad eating habits are just as dangerous as overdosing. I didn't work this hard to get in control of my mental health, for my physical health to be what kills me.

This has to be the year, the day, things change.

Join me and let's support each other in our journey to a better self.