How do I get people to understand why I'm trying to get fit?

YaGirlMaddi
YaGirlMaddi Posts: 88 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I'm tall so I carry my weight well, but before I started my fitness program and few weeks ago I was 2% body fat away from being overweight. And when I tell people about my results and success, they always come back at me "youre skinny, you can eat whatever you want" or " youre going to disappear!". I know I could just change the subject, but sometimes it really angers me.

Replies

  • cloud2011
    cloud2011 Posts: 898 Member
    You don't need to explain it to anyone, but you can always say that being fit is for everyone, and being thin doesn't equal fitness. If you are at goal weight, you still need to exercise and eat right to maintain good health.
  • annette_15
    annette_15 Posts: 1,657 Member
    Tell them you are doing it to get healthy and feel good and to get in shape, not to lose weight. I work out all the time and I'm not doing it to lose weight, or to eat more, or to impress anyone. I do it because it makes me feel good and I enjoy it
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,474 Member
    it should be about you, not them.
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
    You don't.
  • chelsy0587
    chelsy0587 Posts: 441 Member
    KANGOOJUMPS wrote: »
    it should be about you, not them.

    This. Everyone should take care of themselves, and having goals is admirable.
  • Zellyrus
    Zellyrus Posts: 33 Member
    edited January 2016
    In my experience, people that do this mean well and are simply trying to give you a confidence boost (whether you asked for/need it or not!). It's just......social norms and polite society? Women, in particular seem to do this.

    You can always spin it as "stay healthy and fit/tone up/etc" instead of telling about weight loss.
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    Why is there a need to get people to understand why you are trying to get fit? There is not a need to do this.

    Being angered by this at anytime means to me that you care what others think about you, and care about exactly what you are doing and why you are doing it. Why spend so much energy on this?
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
    Why do they even need to know? It's really none of their business.
  • rsclause
    rsclause Posts: 3,103 Member
    Just don't say the word diet because it really isn't. You are adopting a healthier lifestyle so you can get a head start on those 2 or 3 pounds that people put on year after year. I feel great and enjoy the new me, just be happy with you! Some people will never get that but don't stress over it.
  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
    I don't think you need to get people to understand or explain it to anyone. Just saying fitness is important to me or I feel better when I work out or (even better) I enjoy it is enough.

    You say you get these reactions when you tell people about your results and success -- I understand being excited about that, but are you talking to people about it when they express interest? If so it seems weird that they'd not get it at all. I really love talking about fitness and my exercise goals (lifting, triathlon), but I rarely mention it to most people (mostly if they say "what are you doing for the weekend" and I say "oh, on Saturday morning I have this race" or something like that). Some ask about that stuff and are interested (often because they are into similar things or considering it, and of course some have asked about my weight loss, but I can usually tell who actually wants to hear about it and who doesn't.
  • ElizabethOakes2
    ElizabethOakes2 Posts: 1,038 Member
    Pretty much what gia07 said.
    Your fitness is your fitness and you don't have to justify it to anyone. If you really feel the need, just tell them that you want to feel fit and strong. Don't justify it, don't explain it, don't let their misunderstanding make you crazy. :)
  • cerise_noir
    cerise_noir Posts: 5,468 Member
    What everyone else said. Just tell them that you're doing it for health reasons. It's not really anyone else's business. :)
  • Asher_Ethan
    Asher_Ethan Posts: 2,430 Member
    Yeah I get the same thing because I'm so tall. People really do mean well and are trying to compliment you.
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
    How is this even coming up in conversation? For the most part, I don't talk about diet/exercise outside of MFP. It's not an interesting topic for most people and for some people it's a very weighted topic, similar to religion and politics. Unless somebody asks me about what I'm doing, I just don't bring it up. If they ask, I'll say that I started eating less and moving more. If they ask follow up questions I'll go into it more but, like with any topic, I gauge my response to my audience.
  • random255
    random255 Posts: 18 Member
    edited January 2016
    People often make flippant comments (ie "Oh, hun, you're thin as a stick already!") for various reasons. Most of the reasons aren't even mean, it's just a natural human response for some. The best way to handle it, in my opinion, is just not to get into the conversation in the first place. If you're out for a meal, just order whatever it is you want, and don't bother trying to explain or defend that. After all, it's your decision, and it's not like you're going to grill someone over their cheeseburger selection (right?).

    If it gets down to the your last point, where somehow it's brought up (and you didn't bring it up), and you're mad and you don't feel like changing the subject, then try TACTFUL honesty. Don't be angry at the person, but just say something like:

    "I know you mean well and you probably don't realize it, but when you say things like that it is disrespectful and it makes me feel bad. I'm doing this to be healthy, and I'm doing it for me. Would you mind not making comments like that?"

    However you word it, be sincere. They're making you feel defensive, and you know how that sucks, so try not to make them feel defensive in return. If they understand these things aren't what you want (or even need) to hear, they should respect that.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,988 Member
    It's not for you to explain. If they don't approve, then it's their issue not yours.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png
  • macgurlnet
    macgurlnet Posts: 1,946 Member
    I laugh and say "yup, a strong wind will knock me over one of these days" and they laugh and we move on.

    Ignore it as best you can or come up with some clever things to say :)

    ~Lyssa
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    I talk about fitness and whatnot with my fitness friends...that's about it.
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,626 Member
    i dont know why you have to explain anything youre doing to anyone.....
  • garry1824
    garry1824 Posts: 3 Member
    I "was" always a lot larger than I am now, and even though I would cycle a bit, that does not necessarily lose the weight. I found walking was the best, 5 k each morning, now you may say I seem to be off the point, that is just not so. As I really got the weight down, sure I look "skinny", but compare to 5 years ago I am within the correct BMI range (that of course is another topic). I am happier, enjoy my riding, and recently joined the local Parkrun and enjoying my running as well. Over all over 5 years, my weight is down around 25%, but I feel good and enjoy the exercise. My weight has now stabilised based on seasonal variations. So enjoy the exercise, enjoy how you look and if just by doing what you do you get one person to think a bit more about their own weight and lack of general exercise it will be of benefit to all.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,988 Member
    The take away here is that "secretly" most people don't want you to succeed in anything you do because somehow it makes them feel less secure about their own success or lack of it in life.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    YaGirlMaddi wrote: »
    I'm tall so I carry my weight well, but before I started my fitness program and few weeks ago I was 2% body fat away from being overweight. And when I tell people about my results and success, they always come back at me "youre skinny, you can eat whatever you want" or " youre going to disappear!". I know I could just change the subject, but sometimes it really angers me.

    If you have any family members with osteoporosis or low bone density, you could bring this up as a reason to do strength training. My mother, at age 78, is now going to a gym and wishes she had started decades earlier.

    Or just not discuss your fitness with the haters ;)

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