So discouraged

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paigealexandra93
paigealexandra93 Posts: 21 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hi everyone,

I was hoping you could give me some advice. I am 22 years old, 5'5' and I weigh about 185 pounds. I am SO out of shape its embarrassing. I am a student so expensive gym memberships are not an option for me. I have started doing home workouts on youtube, and have specifically chosen the ones that that are for beginners. I can never do more than 15 minutes of a workout and I just feel so ashamed. I am hoping that I can do a few more minutes each week but there is a little voice in my head that tells me that I will never succeed in weight loss (I've been trying to for years but can never stick to a plan) and that I'm failing. I usually get so frusterated I quit because I don't want to think about the negative emotions the frusteration inspires. Advice, please. ):
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Replies

  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
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    Most of us have felt like that at the beginning. I'm sorry your feeling this down. But it really truly does get better as long as you stick with it! You've already got me beat because I couldn't do more then 2 mins when I started! In time it will get easier but you have to keep going !
  • sunnybeaches105
    sunnybeaches105 Posts: 2,831 Member
    edited January 2016
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    You are a perfect candidate for the eat less move more challenge. Just a little bit of progress. Every day. Push yourself
  • cherryblossombabe
    cherryblossombabe Posts: 113 Member
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    You can do it.
    When you first start out it's tough, oh boy it's tough! 15 minutes is great, trust in the process. Each week will get a lil easier I promise. Focus on hitting your calorie goal everyday, don't go crazy and workout everyday if your just starting out, you will burn yourself out and feel like *kitten*..first time around that's exactly what I done!
    Instead take the exercise slow.. Do your 15 minutes and gradually build it up..
    Just believe and tell yourself you will do this, even on the days you want to eat everything in sight and just give up.. Remember why you started, if you want it so badly you will conquer and achieve. Cmon! You can do it!
  • robynmichelle14
    robynmichelle14 Posts: 9 Member
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    First step to any successful journey is loving yourself no matter what. It's hard to find motivation within yourself when you're mean to yourself so much! You can for sure get to your goal size but you have to be kind to yourself on your journey!!
  • evalaporte
    evalaporte Posts: 6 Member
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    I've checked out mindfulness meditations and such on YouTube that help calm negative thoughts when I get down about my progress and health. Stick with your 15 minutes, walk more, and know you're not alone!
  • TheChrissyT
    TheChrissyT Posts: 263 Member
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    robynmichelle14 wrote: »
    First step to any successful journey is loving yourself no matter what. It's hard to find motivation within yourself when you're mean to yourself so much! You can for sure get to your goal size but you have to be kind to yourself on your journey!!

    Your post made me think of this that i saw recentlyhw4eq4z3jqwq.jpg
  • Therealobi1
    Therealobi1 Posts: 3,262 Member
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    If you haven't worked out in awhile 15 mins feels forever. I started out with 30 day shred which was only 20 mins. Worst 20 mins of my life. I couldn't keep up and my body would ache all over for days. Now my fitness levels are so much better.
    You will improve, go easy on yourself and don't give up.
  • DawnieB1977
    DawnieB1977 Posts: 4,248 Member
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    When I was a student I walked everywhere, and I had a bike so did a fair bit of cycling, and I left university a lot smaller than when I started!

    University gyms here in England usually have much cheaper memberships. Gyms weren't so popular back when I started uni in 1996 so I didn't join one, but I did when I was doing my MA.

    When anyone starts working out it's tough, but I'm sure your fitness will improve quickly, and soon you'll be able to complete much longer workouts. Keep going!
  • ReadyWillingEager
    ReadyWillingEager Posts: 56 Member
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    Don't feel bad about the working out being hard stuff. I feel like at the start it's helpful to focus on nutrition, figuring not what keeps you full, tastes good, and isn't too high calorie. Plan meals ahead of time, even a day or two before. Walk more. You don't have to be a drill sergeant!! Also good luck:)
  • jrojeck
    jrojeck Posts: 51 Member
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    Don't ever feel ashamed for wanting to take care of yourself! Never! Make small goals for yourself that you can achieve over the next few months and set yourself a long term goal. So like, "I will run without stop for 5 min, then 10, and so on." Or like, "I will start with doing 3 pushups, then 5."
    These may seem like nothing but it will add up. Make it a game that you play! Unlock achievements! (I'm kind of a nerd.) Get excited about looking and most importantly, feeling good about yourself. You are in the right place here on MFP to stay motivated!
    *hugs*
  • DoubleTheLove
    DoubleTheLove Posts: 42 Member
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    The biggest issue for you right now is that voice in your head telling you, you can't. I've been there and know all about it. I've tried many, many times before to lose weight but I would always get in my own way. Always ended up stopping before I could show any success. My mindset change has been the biggest part of my current weight loss journey. If I walk by a mirror and this "ew" , I tell myself it's okay because I'm working on it. If I try a new healthy food and only get half of it down, I tell myself it's okay because I'm trying. If I feel like I'm not working out for long enough, I tell myself that any is better than none and my half hour each day will add up. You have the power in you to do it! For example, right now I'm trying to get myself to eat oatmeal for breakfast each morning.. The first few days I got through a few spoonfuls, then a few more, then even more and now I'm just about up to eating a full bowl. It's taken about 2 weeks to eat a lousy bowl of oatmeal. Ridiculous? Maybe. But it's working and I'm not making this torturous for myself. I'm not making myself want to quit. It won't happen overnight but every step counts. You don't wake up 10 pounds lighter, you wake up each day for 10 weeks point something of a pound lighter. ;) Bit by bit you will get there, don't give up on yourself!
  • robburry_85
    robburry_85 Posts: 91 Member
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    All it take is little steps you can do this add me if you like for some support.
  • elaineamj
    elaineamj Posts: 347 Member
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    I'm a very active person (hike and bike for hours). And yet, when I started this journey a few weeks ago, I decided I really needed easy wins to give myself plenty of positive feedback. So I started with 10 minute Youtube videos for beginners - specifically the low impact stuff. After a week, I shifted to 20 minute low impact cardio. This week, I moved on to 30 min low impact cardio and finding it a little harder than I like so I may rewind a little.

    I'm feeling really good - the easy wins leave me feeling encouraged and positive. For the first time in 15 years - I actually think I can drop the weight.

    You know yourself best (or maybe you'll have to try a few different things). Some people respond well to an extreme challenge and can push past that (I can if I have other people - but since I am doing this at home, I don't have that). Others work best with very slow, very easy wins.
  • StacyChrz
    StacyChrz Posts: 865 Member
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    First, you sound just like so many of us when we started. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!! Many people start their weight loss journey never having been active before and find it very difficult to start an exercise routine. If all you can do is 15 minutes, then do the 15 minutes and be proud of yourself. That's 15 minutes you weren't doing before you started. Also, if you want to get in 30 minutes/day you can try breaking it up and doing 15 in the morning and 15 in the evening. As the above posters have said, be good to yourself. We're all here to support one another. If you need an 'ear' send us a note. I'm sure there are many people on this site who have felt the way you do at any given moment.

    Don't give up, slow and steady is the way to go. Pretty soon the changes will start to get easier.
  • ARGriffy
    ARGriffy Posts: 1,002 Member
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    Therealobi1 wrote: »
    If you haven't worked out in awhile 15 mins feels forever. I started out with 30 day shred which was only 20 mins. Worst 20 mins of my life. I couldn't keep up and my body would ache all over for days. Now my fitness levels are so much better.
    You will improve, go easy on yourself and don't give up.

    My journey also started with 30 day shred, it helped me amazingly because I was also, horrifically embarrassingly out of shape! I now out - pushup my husband ;) you can do this!!!
  • ntnunk
    ntnunk Posts: 936 Member
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    We have a saying in the computer programming world that pertains to the completion of tasks that appear to be insurmountable at the beginning: "How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time."

    Just realize you didn't get out of shape overnight and you won't get into shape overnight. Take small steps, set small, achievable goals, and soon the progress and sense of accomplishment will become self-sustaining and motivating. As a personal example, I started cycling about 5 years ago at 41 years old, 70 lbs overweight and horribly, horribly out of shape. My first bike ride was an easy, flat 8 mile ride with friends that left me completely wrecked. Now, 5 years on, I've completed 22 bike races of various types over the last 8 months, my first race of 2016 is in 10 days, and I barely even consider an 8 mile ride a warm-up, much less a workout.

    The first step is to start somewhere. You can do this. Just set yourself a small fitness goal. Even something as simple as 10 minutes walking up and down some stairs or something. Soon what feels difficult today will seem laughably easy. Just do a little more every time.

    Good luck with your journey!

  • ponycyndi
    ponycyndi Posts: 858 Member
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    I've been there. It's hard to be in my 30's and realize I can't do 10 minutes on the elliptical. It's even harder carrying around extra weight. Imagine caring a sack of dog food or potatoes with you everywhere you go. It's hard!

    But it does get easier, even 5lbs less! And if you can only do 8 minutes today, in a week you can do 12! When I started I felt like I would die after 10 minutes of cardio. Now I'm 35 lbs lighter, and it does get easier the more you do it. If you told me that after 6 months I would be able to do a 5k, or an hour long cardio class with no problem, I would have laughed in you face! But I did it, and I could not be happier.
  • MeganWillet
    MeganWillet Posts: 29 Member
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    I totally am with you. I talk to myself so negatively that I end up just quitting and drinking an entire bottle of wine. Stay Strong - and if you have a bad day - there's always a tomorrow coming.
  • sanfromny
    sanfromny Posts: 770 Member
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    paigealexandra93 wrote: »
    Hi everyone,

    I was hoping you could give me some advice. I am 22 years old, 5'5' and I weigh about 185 pounds. I am SO out of shape its embarrassing. I am a student so expensive gym memberships are not an option for me. I have started doing home workouts on youtube, and have specifically chosen the ones that that are for beginners. I can never do more than 15 minutes of a workout and I just feel so ashamed. I am hoping that I can do a few more minutes each week but there is a little voice in my head that tells me that I will never succeed in weight loss (I've been trying to for years but can never stick to a plan) and that I'm failing. I usually get so frusterated I quit because I don't want to think about the negative emotions the frustration inspires. Advice, please. ):

    How's your nutrition? You can exercise forever but if you're eating crap then that's your first goal. How many times a week are you exercising? 15 minutes is a good start. Do one more minute each day. That's what worked for me. You become stronger everyday. If you did 15 today do 16 tomorrow. It WILL get better. Drink plenty of water also. There was a time in my 20s at 5'2 that I weighed 215-220 lbs. I'm 165 now. Little steps. Baby steps. And when one day doesn't go as planned wake up and start over the next day. The beauty of life is that everyday we wake up that means we are given another chance to be better than we were yesterday ;)
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
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    That was pretty much me in the beginning. I'd be winded within a minute of a workout.

    Walking helped. I walked everyday. I couldn't do much in the beginning. And to be honest, I cried when I reached the 1 mile marker out my local park. But I kept going and slowly increased to 4 miles a day. Which eventually led to being able to run a 5k.

    Start small. Don't feel ashamed. Everyone starts from the beginning. Just keep your head up and in the game and keep going.

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