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    Reacting to compliments

    Posts: 53 Member
    edited November 2024 in Success Stories
    As you all are losing weight, how do you react to compliments? I'm not big on seeking attention and the positive reinforcement is more embarrassing to me then helpful. I'm not saying I get mad when someone compliments me, but I'm not exactly comfortable with it. It may be a "guy thing" or it may be my own issue.

    I guess I feel like my journey isn't done yet and I don't want buy into my own success yet. Strictly a mental thing with me. I feel like if I start listening to everyone's kind words, I may get a little complacent and lose motivation.

    I guess what I'm really asking is how do you respond to compliments politely while trying to remain humble and focused?

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    • Posts: 4,397 Member
      "Thanks"

      I don't like when people make unsolicited comments about my body either, even if they are positive. It's just uncomfortable for me. So I just say thanks and move along, change the subject, whatever.
    • Posts: 50 Member
      I like it. I take it as I would any other compliment. It's just someone saying something nice. Reading into it is where you get yourself in trouble.
    • Posts: 1,452 Member
      edited January 2016
      launchpadmkquak wrote: »
      As you all are losing weight, how do you react to compliments? I'm not big on seeking attention and the positive reinforcement is more embarrassing to me then helpful. I'm not saying I get mad when someone compliments me, but I'm not exactly comfortable with it. It may be a "guy thing" or it may be my own issue.

      I guess I feel like my journey isn't done yet and I don't want buy into my own success yet. Strictly a mental thing with me. I feel like if I start listening to everyone's kind words, I may get a little complacent and lose motivation.

      I guess what I'm really asking is how do you respond to compliments politely while trying to remain humble and focused?

      I agree with you there. I've learned to strictly go by my own (and my doctor's) opinion of my body. People were telling me how slim I was when I was still 20lbs away from a healthy BMI(????). People generally do *not* know what healthy looks like, especially here in the USA, where everyone and everything is huge, so it's smart that you're teaching yourself now to ignore everyone's compliments.
      Compliments don't really bother me, but advice-type commentary is what really annoys me.
      I say "thank you" with a small smile and change the subject. It's polite, and it gives the person a tiny hint that you won't be focusing on your weight control success for the rest of your time together.
    • Posts: 349 Member
      "Thanks. I've been working hard at it."
    • Posts: 8,626 Member
      'thanks for noticing' and a smile

    • Posts: 18,878 Member
      "Thank you". That's really all it needs. I think of compliments as anything else that someone may give me. I may not have asked for it, or needed it, but they went out of their way to give it, so I ought to say thank you. Telling them they are wrong, or rejecting may be impolite. But I also don't go on to expand on my thanks unless I'm comfortable getting into a conversation about my methods, and all that conversation entails.
    • Posts: 89 Member
      It takes me by surprise, because I don't feel like I look different really until I look at a before picture is the only time I can tell. I just say thanks, I guess I still don't yet feel like I'm at a good weight, but I'm only 15lbs from my original goal. It makes me kinda uncomfortable for people to acknowledge it, I have social anxiety and knowing someone has paid attention makes me nervous. But I appreciate the compliment and their kindness I do, just still have a mental barrier there.
    • Posts: 908 Member
      It was really hard at first to actually accept a compliment and not think either "oh they're just being nice" or "this is somehow backhanded and they really mean it as an insult." The longer I've stayed around the same size (not weight) the easier it has gotten. Maybe because less of the compliments revolve around "oh you look like you've lost weight" and so on and are now more like "you look pretty today." To be honest I think I'm still quite self conscious of the weight loss compliments, maybe because I'm not quite at goal yet or because I'm realizing my confidence issues never stemmed from my weight in the first place.

      Like others have said I usually smile and say thank you. After all they took the time to say something nice, that kinda thing doesn't happen very often any more and it deserves a nice response.
    • Posts: 11,463 Member
      robingmurphy wrote: »
      "Thanks. I've been working hard at it."

      ^^this. I'll take all the encouragement I can get. It's not easy.
    • Posts: 1,056 Member
      "Thanks, I feel great."
    • Posts: 9 Member
      callsitlikeiseeit wrote: »
      'thanks for noticing' and a smile

      Exactly!
    • Posts: 9,562 Member
      "Thank you." And then change the subject. Because sometimes they are just being polite and do not want to talk about it much either.
      If they do want to talk more about it, it is none of their business. The weight loss journey is very personal. And if that is how you feel about it, keep it that way.
      BTW, congrats on your loss :)
    • Posts: 53 Member
      Thanks for all your thoughts and feedback.
    • Posts: 520 Member
      I_Will_End_You wrote: »
      "Thanks"

      I don't like when people make unsolicited comments about my body either, even if they are positive. It's just uncomfortable for me. So I just say thanks and move along, change the subject, whatever.

      ^ this - it always makes me uncomfortable. I'm sure that the person giving the compliment is coming from a good place, but I don't feel like it's ok to comment on my body. I'm losing weight for my health, not for attention.
    • Posts: 80 Member
      Start giving well meant compliments to people and watch how they react. I think the world becomes a better and more positive place when people compliment each other more (especially in the Netherlands where people barely give compliments). Every compliment given by another human being is for me a little gift. It means someone is interested enough in you to notice you and to be kind. To me it doesnt have anything to do with your weight, but if you value yourself enough as a human being to trust the person telling you something nice is not saying it because he or she is just trying to get something out of it. How you handle yourself receiving it and the way you react depends on your own grace and charming personality.
    • Posts: 808 Member
      launchpadmkquak wrote: »
      As you all are losing weight, how do you react to compliments? I'm not big on seeking attention and the positive reinforcement is more embarrassing to me then helpful. I'm not saying I get mad when someone compliments me, but I'm not exactly comfortable with it. It may be a "guy thing" or it may be my own issue.

      I guess I feel like my journey isn't done yet and I don't want buy into my own success yet. Strictly a mental thing with me. I feel like if I start listening to everyone's kind words, I may get a little complacent and lose motivation.

      I guess what I'm really asking is how do you respond to compliments politely while trying to remain humble and focused?

      I feel awkward when I get a compliment because I feel there's a certain thing I should say in response but have no idea what it is. Totally get you on the 'journey isn't done' thing, nobody else really gets that when they think you're slim enough already. What they think I should be happy with and what I'm happy with are different.
    • Posts: 136 Member
      It makes me feel awkward when people comment on it. I lost about 70 pounds but it has been years since I initially lost the weight and I still get comments about it when I post a photo to facebook. I just say thanks and try to move on to another subject.
    • Posts: 76 Member
      Nod smile be polite and professional and say thank you.
    • Posts: 573 Member
      "Damn straight, I'm a sexy beast! *flex*

      Well I say that in my head at least, I usually just smile and say thanks. I do like specific compliments though. I had someone compliment my forearms and while I found that odd it made me feel really good because that is one of my weakest areas. Compliments just let you know you're headed in the right direction, not that you are done.
    • Posts: 166 Member
      Hardly ever get complimented :neutral: I do notice more people stare I guess
    • Posts: 74 Member
      It's truly intended as a kindness. Most people know how much work goes into losing weight. Just say "Thanks".
    • Posts: 3 Member
      It's hard for me to take a compliment in general about anything, much less weight loss. When I hear, "wow, you've lost a lot of weight", what I really truly hear is "dang, you were huge, before!"...

      "Thanks", comes out of my mouth, as I was raised to be polite, but much like everyone else out there, compliments can be hard to take, even with the best of intentions...
    • Posts: 1,267 Member
      I just say "thanks! I've been working really hard and hope to continue in my success!" Usually people won't push or embarrass you if they have a feeling you've still got work to do.
      When I know someone is working hard to lose and be healthy I make a point to let them know how great they look and how well they are doing, but I drop it at that b/c I don't want to make them feel insecure.
    • Posts: 1,680 Member
      edited January 2016
      callsitlikeiseeit wrote: »
      'thanks for noticing' and a smile

      this...

      but i get you about not wanting it to get into your head. it can derail your progress if you let it. just say, thanks, and don't give in any more significance than it deserves. your journey is your own. sometimes the comments others make can be off the wall. i had a neighbor yesterday say she was going to start calling me skinny debi. i waved it off and made it a joke. "aww... just debi's fine." with a sort of mock "you shouldn't have" expression. it will get easier. good luck:-)
    • Posts: 2,668 Member
      I am not good at receiving compliments. I don't know why, it just makes me uncomfortable. It's not just compliments about my appearance, it's anything really. I always say thank you but I have a hard time accepting compliments gracefully.
    • Posts: 1,133 Member
      Azercord wrote: »
      "Damn straight, I'm a sexy beast! *flex*

      hahhaha i can't wait to be able to say this, and I will....outloud...twice. Just in case they didn't hear me the first time. :D
    • Posts: 13,575 Member
      I usually just say thanks to a compliment. The comments that fluster me are "Did you lose weight?" Especially if I haven't.
    • Posts: 265 Member
      It feels good, but I hate when people ask how much I've lost or get into details. I just say thanks and move on.
    • Posts: 480 Member
      hope516 wrote: »
      show previous quotes

      hahhaha i can't wait to be able to say this, and I will....outloud...twice. Just in case they didn't hear me the first time. :D

      @hope516 please come back and update when you've use it! (and not on your best friend either) lol
    • Posts: 314 Member
      It makes me feel uncomfortable because I haven't actually lost weight for about six months, and even then, my progress was super slow. I feel embarrassed because I could have/should have lost so much more. I feel undeserving.
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