How do you get your hubby's help in this?

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heatherrose
heatherrose Posts: 20
in Health and Weight Loss
So i decided that about a week ago that this was the last week of mommy fat Heather and i was going to strive for a new healthier skinnier me. I want my old pre baby body back! I have been doing so good! I have lost about 4 lbs and am really motivated to keep going! My only problem is that my hubby isnt really behind this. He says i look great just how i am blah blah blah.... Which is sweet and i think when he see's the pounds coming off he will be excited but in the mean time its like he is trying to make this voyage harder for me. He made a huge batch of Choc chip cookies saturday, bought my fav candy bar reeces peanut buter cups (huge snack pack of them) and put them in the fridge, stuff like that....Keep in mind since i have known him 3 1/2 years he has never made cookies. What do i do. I had the willpower this weekend but those damn cookies and cups are staring me in the face! uggg!
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Replies

  • heatherrose
    heatherrose Posts: 20
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    So i decided that about a week ago that this was the last week of mommy fat Heather and i was going to strive for a new healthier skinnier me. I want my old pre baby body back! I have been doing so good! I have lost about 4 lbs and am really motivated to keep going! My only problem is that my hubby isnt really behind this. He says i look great just how i am blah blah blah.... Which is sweet and i think when he see's the pounds coming off he will be excited but in the mean time its like he is trying to make this voyage harder for me. He made a huge batch of Choc chip cookies saturday, bought my fav candy bar reeces peanut buter cups (huge snack pack of them) and put them in the fridge, stuff like that....Keep in mind since i have known him 3 1/2 years he has never made cookies. What do i do. I had the willpower this weekend but those damn cookies and cups are staring me in the face! uggg!
  • Kateeliz
    Kateeliz Posts: 147 Member
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    I feel you on this :grumble:
    Luckily (for this purpose only) my husband is stationed overseas for a year. So I am taking the time he is away to improve on myself. But I am SO nervous for when he gets home, he is one of the most unhealthy eaters I know, and he is still thin as a toothpick! :huh:

    So I am bumping this topic in hopes that some others will know how to deal! :drinker:
  • memaw66
    memaw66 Posts: 2,558 Member
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    Tell him you appreciate the gesture but next time please make you something healthy instead. Tell him you are working on being healthy so that you will be around for a long time!!!


    Memaw
  • heatherrose
    heatherrose Posts: 20
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    Glad i am not alone! My hubby is a very unhealthy eater also and to be honest could lose a few pounds himself so i figured he would be onboard completely! uggg!
    That has to be hard having your man gone for so long! If it makes it any easier we all APPRECIATE his and your sacrifice-the military men and their families are amazing! Thanks for all you both give up to keep us all safe!
  • GIGINATOR
    GIGINATOR Posts: 355 Member
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    I had that problem last year when I was losing a bunch of weight. After I lost 50lbs, he finally said "OK, I'm in, you are obviously doing something right. So this year he is side by side with me on our mission together.
  • Renae_Nae
    Renae_Nae Posts: 935 Member
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    I have the opposite problem. My husband tries to pick off my plate when he's done instead of getting up and getting more and he reason is "I'm helping you out with your calories!" :grumble:

    He used to not be like that though. The first two months he gave me grief, told me not to worry about it, begged for the fattening foods, etc. Once I sat him down and told him HOW I'm doing this, that it's not a crash diet and I'm eating enough, he backed off a little. After the first 10 pounds he looked at me on Thanksgiving and said "Wow baby, you look good!" Now he's over supportive, don't beg me not to go to the gym and is very careful about the snacks/drinks he brings home. If it's something he knows I REALLY like (like Mt Dew) he'll leave it at work :smile:

    Give it some time, push through. They are usually scared about how weight-loss is going to affect you or they feel guilty/jealous that they aren't losing too. Sit down and really talk with him about what this means for you and I'm sure he'll stop with all the cookies and snacks. Just beware...some times they decide they like your way better then you can't keep salad stuff in the house either :laugh:
  • tmbish82
    tmbish82 Posts: 43
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    i feel the same way!!! :ohwell: my fiancee actually prefers me with the extra weight!!! :huh: i likes me at exactly the weight i am (which just happens to be one of the highest weights i have ever been :mad: ). i find it so hard to stick to the eating portion especially because he loves to cook and is himself kinda fat and happy at the moment!! :frown:
  • heatherrose
    heatherrose Posts: 20
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    i think one of his biggest problems is that he thinks if i lose all this weight then i can leave him for a younger skinnier version! So dumb! I am doing this for me and my health! I guess i just need to sit him down and tell him that. Also one by one start throwing away all the fat snacks in the house :)
  • Nlongenecker
    Nlongenecker Posts: 765
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    Check out this article on the Prevention website, it's called, "Dieting with the Enemy, Are Friends and Family Making You Fat?" It tells why our loved ones may be sabotaging us (sometimes unintentionally) and how we can keep going. Hope it helps.

    http://www.prevention.com/cda/article/dieting-with-the-enemy/aa0968f271903110VgnVCM10000013281eac____/weight.loss/strategies.for.success/support.for.weight.loss/0/0/2
  • apdoxies
    apdoxies Posts: 57
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    My husband does both. He wakes me up at 5:00 in the morning & literally yells at me...wanting to know WHY I'm not on the exercise bike yet.
    THEN, he brings home fatty meat for dinner & says "yuck" to everything that I suggest we have instead. OR, he begs me to make something sweet - even though he knows I can't have any (if I take one bite...I'll eat the whole thing!). If I don't make it, he buys a huge tub of ice cream!
    I just can't win sometimes!
    UGH! MEN! LOL
  • ramonaschack
    ramonaschack Posts: 33 Member
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    Mine is thin and eats a lot. He just went to the doctor and is now on high blood pressure and high cholesterol medicines. I thought good now is a great time (selfishly) for us to start eating basically fruits, vegetables, whole grains and some lean protein which is what I have been trying to do but it is almost impossible if you have a family eating other crap. Well when I talked to him about nutrition, etc. he told me that the Dr. told him point blank that his problems were hereditary and that all he has to do is take the meds and not change his eating that he can not blame it on being over weight or smoking or anything like that. UGH what - I think doctors should push nutrition more. So here I go trying to get around the junk food
  • heatherrose
    heatherrose Posts: 20
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    Thankyou all for your help and its nice to know that i am not the only one!
  • gingermoon
    gingermoon Posts: 239 Member
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    I just ignore my husband. :laugh:

    I've been a size 2 to a size 16 and back again since we've been together.
    Naturally he quietly prefers the smaller me, which do I, but he's never said anything negatively either way.

    He wines about wanting to lose weight, but won't do anyhing about it.
    I've tried for a couple of years to get him out and about like we use to be, but no dice.
    Nothing sticks more than a day or 2.
    If he wants to do a physical activity, I stop what I'm doing and participate with him.
    But, I just ignore him and don't let his sedentary life affect mine.
    I know how I look the best, and I know I can once again work hard and get to my happy weight.
    I'm in control of my own happiness and wellbeing.

    I workout 5-7 times a week, I do all the cooking, so I'm in total control of all foods.
    We never fry foods and rarely eat out or have ready made meals.

    We're child free, so we just don't keep any junk food in the house, just light popcorn and sugar free/fat free puddings.

    So I've laid out all the groundwork for him.
    All he has to do is get up and exercise, but until that day happens, he's not going to bring down my momentum!

    There are sometimes when you just have to put yourself first! :flowerforyou:
  • hmo4
    hmo4 Posts: 1,673 Member
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    My husband is finally with me in this. Just tell him to ease up on the junk or you're not putting out!:laugh:
  • TRLTAMPA
    TRLTAMPA Posts: 824
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    Just stick with it. He'll realize you're serious and come around. That's what happened with my husband.
  • Hannah_Banana
    Hannah_Banana Posts: 1,242 Member
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    I'm with the dear lady who said she just ignores her husband. :laugh:

    I do the same thing. For some reason, a lot of men seem to like us all fluffyfied. Maybe it makes us look fertile? :huh:

    Regardless, yes, I have gotten a lot of resistance to my diet. If I even MENTION that I might be 60 calories under my limit for the day (I am generally pleased about this) DH stands up, and hollers at me that I MUST eat ALL my calories, otherwise I will be starving myself. :ohwell: Then, whenever I start wistfully talking about how I am going to be all trim and fit or I point out how little I want to be, DH just says 'Ewww.' And we aren't talking VS model thin either, we are just talking AVERAGE.

    *sigh* I can offer no advice, other than to simply ignore. They may love what we look like now, but they will love how we ACT when we are comfortable with our bodies. I made the promise that DH could pick out my new wardrobe when I got to the size I wanted to be. :noway: That seems to motivate him when nothing else will, however I fear that I will be going to daycare looking like a hoochie. :embarassed:
  • heatherrose
    heatherrose Posts: 20
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    HAAA i kinda like the dont put out answer the best :) LOL
  • redclix
    redclix Posts: 2
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    The way to a man's heart is....:embarassed:

    I just pointed out to him that I don't feel sexy at this weight, and I feel like it's affecting my desire to...er....be naked.

    That pretty much convinced him. ROFL:laugh:
  • Nlongenecker
    Nlongenecker Posts: 765
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    All I can say is sometimes they will surprise you...REALLY surprise you. This weekend I helped my hubby set up an account on mfp (not very computer literate). I can't believe it! We have both been entering our calories and working out. I am telling you, I never imagined he would be asking me, "Do you know how many calories are in..." or "If I work out this long, how many calories do you think I'll burn?" It's kind of blowing my mind:smile:

    Then I guess this is a good thing...I can't cheat when he's around.
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
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    After about a month of my (our) new lifestyle my DH walked in all grumpy..."what is for dinner"
    When I told him what we were having he yelled

    I WANT MEAT!!!

    I couldnt help but LOL!

    I bought him a nice steak the next day and ate my salmon.

    He told me he just felt left out because I was throwing away the bad stuff and he didnt have a choice. I advised him he certainly does. Just go grocery shopping, bring in all the bags, put them away. Select dinner meat, pull from freezer before leaving for work. Come home chop up the ingredients, cook the foods, put them on the plates. then when done, wash all the dishes and put them away.

    He thanked me for the salmon the next night.

    :flowerforyou:

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