arggg. how many times must I 'relearn' this overeating lesson :(

ciddoe
ciddoe Posts: 26 Member
edited November 2024 in Motivation and Support
i guess this is more of a rant and a chance for some people to knock some sense into me. i've been battling my weight for a few years, both up and down. i came out of an anorexic stint and went from 78 lbs to 158 lbs.

now, currently, i am 137. but i am 5'2 and 21, so my doc and ED specialist said shoot for 117 lbs based on my bones. so hey, 20 lbs, not that bad! but i've been trying for an entire calendar year to lose it. it was just so hard to diet after anorexia. my brain was straight up like NO!!!! and it was almost as if i had no control. i just kept eating (mind you, not binge eating. this is eating when i'm hungry, or when im slightly hungry).

bottom line, i'm mad at myself. today i at over 1700 calories, and ruined my first day back on the exercise wagon (got clearance from my doc cause i had some old heart issues).

its just like, how many times must i say "log it, move on, better tomorrow," if tomorrow is never better?! ahh i'm mad at myself i really am.

i dont know what to do but ask if anyone else has this stupid "keep re-learning" thing, and how to finally overcome it and stop the bullcrap.

also, im not a "yo yo dieter," just an overweight person who happens to be recovering from ONE stint with anorexia.

Replies

  • bellabonbons
    bellabonbons Posts: 705 Member
    You've been through a very stressful time very difficult. I would say just relax stay where you are and get comfortable eating and enjoying food. I don't know a lot about anorexia but what I have studied is that it is a control issue. I think the last thing you need is super control right now. Actually I am surprised that your doctor suggested losing 20 pounds. If I was your doctor I would not encourage you to lose more weight I think you've done excellent to gain to 137 good job! :)
  • Desifreckle
    Desifreckle Posts: 110 Member
    To answer your question....as many times as it takes, because this isn't really a diet. You are aware and trying to eat better, and you will have bad days! I understand being angry with yourself, I go through it often. Try not to be too hard on yourself though, you need to find a balance that you can stick to and live with. That may take a lot of time to figure out!
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