Reacting to compliments

I am bad at receiving compliments. A voice in my head says you still have work to do and you aren't there yet. But I hold back and say thanks not even truly hearing the compliment. I need to work on that.

beautifulsparkles wrote: »

It makes me feel uncomfortable because I haven't actually lost weight for about six months, and even then, my progress was super slow. I feel embarrassed because I could have/should have lost so much more. I feel undeserving.

Thats one way to look at it, but the other way is that you have lost some weight and kept it off! If you had done nothing you would still be your original size!

People here don't really say anything on my weight loss; I think because they don't know what to say (I'm talking about people i'm not close too.) Family and friends sometimes say something like: "You're keeping it up, that's great! Way to go" or "You look good now" and I just say 'yeah' or 'thanks', I didn't feel awkward or anything because those people are close to me so I feel comfortable around them.

However yesterday we were in a group at college; I didn't really know most of the people (I mean, they weren't people I was close too; we were juste classmates) and one of my friends there (who didn't see me in two weeks) said : "Wow, you look good; I wish I had your will power" (She was a diet buddy but gave up a few weeks in).

It was a genuine compliment, nothing backhanded or anything but all of a sudden all of the others thought that since the subject was on the table they can talk about it. So out of nowhere, I got 20 people or so complimenting me on my loss. I was feeling really awkward and I didn't know what to say. Fortunately that same friend noticed it and just said: "Yeah, you look great!" then changed the subject.

Weird thing is that at the beginning of my journey I was waiting impatiently for those comments! And the first time I got those (first couple of weeks) from family I felt great. But after about 20lbs the change became really noticeable and the comments became too much. I didn't know how to handle it gracefully and just began to resent myself for making people feel awkward by making me a compliment.

neldabg wrote: »

launchpadmkquak wrote: »

As you all are losing weight, how do you react to compliments? I'm not big on seeking attention and the positive reinforcement is more embarrassing to me then helpful. I'm not saying I get mad when someone compliments me, but I'm not exactly comfortable with it. It may be a "guy thing" or it may be my own issue.

I guess I feel like my journey isn't done yet and I don't want buy into my own success yet. Strictly a mental thing with me. I feel like if I start listening to everyone's kind words, I may get a little complacent and lose motivation.

I guess what I'm really asking is how do you respond to compliments politely while trying to remain humble and focused?

I agree with you there. I've learned to strictly go by my own (and my doctor's) opinion of my body. People were telling me how slim I was when I was still 20lbs away from a healthy BMI(????). People generally do *not* know what healthy looks like, especially here in the USA, where everyone and everything is huge, so it's smart that you're teaching yourself now to ignore everyone's compliments.
Compliments don't really bother me, but advice-type commentary is what really annoys me.
I say "thank you" with a small smile and change the subject. It's polite, and it gives the person a tiny hint that you won't be focusing on your weight control success for the rest of your time together.

The same has happened to me and continues to happen, when I first lost 50lbs two years ago, everybody was telling me how good I look, and how I should stop...although I was under a bmi of 30, I was JUST under, another 10 would have been near perfect.

I Proceeded to starting bulking "on purpose" and now im cutting and I guess I look thinner...my own mom and others have said I shouldn't lose anymore, that I'd be too skinny, yet all of theae people tell me tales of how they used to look, or how "they do it when they want to slim down". In most cases, Im yet to see when they were ir are "in shape".

I actually enjoy the compliments and say a polite "thank you" like others here, because reality is although the compliments make me feel good and tells me the my progress is noticeable, I dont want to hear your "advice" and dont want to go into how I do it, just to get criticized by someone who has no clue what it takes.

^ This. Most people seem to want to hear of a miracle new diet or some fad.

When I lost in the past, I was more upset at people that normally wouldn't give me the time of day, now gave me attention only because I was slim. That was hard!