Joined a dating site for motivation
AriesGal329
Posts: 236 Member
I've been divorced for over a year and have not dated at all. I joined Match yesterday and let me tell ya....the thought of someone potentially seeing um, "all" of me is very motivating!
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Replies
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I understand @lauragreenbaum148 I feel the same way about dating now. Finally working on getting back to me. MFP has helped a lot!0
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Lolz. Good luck. People love to waste your time!0
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Yeah so far it's been pretty annoying. And what is with the people trying to scam?? "Hi I'm writing to you for a friend who uses my account...he lives in your area and is a great guy..." Seriously????0
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Hey but don't let extra pounds stop you. Due to privacy reasons I never have proper pictures online but when I last used okcupid I sent out pictures to guys who had already said they wanted to meet after messaging for a while. All of them still wanted to meet. All of them seemed to find me attractive, tummy, big legs and all. One of them has been my partner for more than a year now. And by them time I got naked in front of him, it was pretty obvious he'd like what was underneath.0
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@lauragreenbaum148 don't let someone else drive your weight loss.. it will only stick if you're doing it for YOU, not for someone else. the right guy will find you attractive regardless of your body, not because or in spite of.0
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I am really glad I'm not single/looking right now. The whole online dating thing is ridiculous and I don't miss it. It's one thing if you're just looking for some fun, but to find a serious relationship?
good luck. 0 -
Megan met my husband online and we're not spring chickens! God is good and we are happy and in a very healthy relationship. It's not for everyone but it does work.0
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Megan met my husband online and we're not spring chickens! God is good and we are happy and in a very healthy relationship. It's not for everyone but it does work.
Married 5 years and 3 kids. It can work!
My top tips:
Never message them first.
Let them find you!!
You decide who to write back, and when.
Don't give too much away too fast and enjoy the chase.
Let them send you pictures first - Google search to make sure it's not stolen from somewhere.
Don't give your real email until you are comfortable. I would make a second account in case you get a wierdo stalker.0 -
Expatmommy79 wrote: »Megan met my husband online and we're not spring chickens! God is good and we are happy and in a very healthy relationship. It's not for everyone but it does work.
Married 5 years and 3 kids. It can work!
My top tips:
Never message them first.
Let them find you!!
You decide who to write back, and when.
Don't give too much away too fast and enjoy the chase.
Let them send you pictures first - Google search to make sure it's not stolen from somewhere.
Don't give your real email until you are comfortable. I would make a second account in case you get a wierdo stalker.
I totally agree with not giving out real life info too soon but why should I wait until an interesting man sends a message? If he's the kind of guy who needs to feel he's chasing me, then he's not the right kind of guy for me! And yes, of course I decide when to write back, but so should the other person in the conversation. Nobody should pressure anybody but that goes for men AND women.0 -
Thanks all. I did post a few pics, but I wasn't too worried about that. Should I be? They are just basically head shots like the one in my profile here. I did create a totally separate email account just for match. I haven't approached anyone, and will definitely let them come to me first. I've had a few scam emails, but they are pretty easy to catch. Did I mention I met my now ex-husband on match.com? That was a LONG time ago back in 2000. A lot has changed.0
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MikaMojito wrote: »Expatmommy79 wrote: »Megan met my husband online and we're not spring chickens! God is good and we are happy and in a very healthy relationship. It's not for everyone but it does work.
Married 5 years and 3 kids. It can work!
My top tips:
Never message them first.
Let them find you!!
You decide who to write back, and when.
Don't give too much away too fast and enjoy the chase.
Let them send you pictures first - Google search to make sure it's not stolen from somewhere.
Don't give your real email until you are comfortable. I would make a second account in case you get a wierdo stalker.
I totally agree with not giving out real life info too soon but why should I wait until an interesting man sends a message? If he's the kind of guy who needs to feel he's chasing me, then he's not the right kind of guy for me! And yes, of course I decide when to write back, but so should the other person in the conversation. Nobody should pressure anybody but that goes for men AND women.
Because waiting for them to find you implies that they at least read your profile and made the effort to click and find something nice to say...as opposed to confusing your interest by writing to them first as another desperate woman that's easy to bed.
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meganridenour wrote: »I am really glad I'm not single/looking right now. The whole online dating thing is ridiculous and I don't miss it. It's one thing if you're just looking for some fun, but to find a serious relationship? good luck.
It does happen though! Met my partner on a dating site
being patient and knowing crap when you see it are both key! 0 -
Oh man good luck, I do horribly on those dating site. Lol0
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Megan met my husband online and we're not spring chickens! God is good and we are happy and in a very healthy relationship. It's not for everyone but it does work.
Say what? "Megan" met your husband? Then... how did you meet him?
Anyway, I met my husband on eHarmony. It doesn't work for everyone but it worked for us. But if we didn't like someone, we also said "no" to a date or dropped them after the first one. That's how you save time. That and dating many people at once (not sexually, just dates).0 -
Expatmommy79 wrote: »
Because waiting for them to find you implies that they at least read your profile and made the effort to click and find something nice to say...as opposed to confusing your interest by writing to them first as another desperate woman that's easy to bed.
You know, if that's how he thinks, then I'm probably going to notice pretty soon. I met some really nice guys while online-dating and with a fair few of them, it was me who contacted them first. Read the profile and made the effort to click and find something nice to say. Yeah, some of them did try to get me to bed soonish but some others were great dates and one of them is my boyfriend now.
And @lauragreenbaum148, you should NOT be worried about pictures. But I value my privacy and I would hate for my pupils to find my dating profile.
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Expatmommy79 wrote: »MikaMojito wrote: »Expatmommy79 wrote: »Megan met my husband online and we're not spring chickens! God is good and we are happy and in a very healthy relationship. It's not for everyone but it does work.
Married 5 years and 3 kids. It can work!
My top tips:
Never message them first.
Let them find you!!
You decide who to write back, and when.
Don't give too much away too fast and enjoy the chase.
Let them send you pictures first - Google search to make sure it's not stolen from somewhere.
Don't give your real email until you are comfortable. I would make a second account in case you get a wierdo stalker.
I totally agree with not giving out real life info too soon but why should I wait until an interesting man sends a message? If he's the kind of guy who needs to feel he's chasing me, then he's not the right kind of guy for me! And yes, of course I decide when to write back, but so should the other person in the conversation. Nobody should pressure anybody but that goes for men AND women.
Because waiting for them to find you implies that they at least read your profile and made the effort to click and find something nice to say...as opposed to confusing your interest by writing to them first as another desperate woman that's easy to bed.
I don't agree with this. There are just as many shy men out there who won't make first contact with someone they fear would give them the brush off. People soon get a good idea of who's after what and if you simply wait for someone to come to you it could mean you miss out on someone great.0 -
Keep in mind that not everyone's so hot at expressing themselves online, and you may not have put out there that, for example, you're a huge Tolkien nerd because linguistics makes you loopy.. That may be a major thing for someone who would be interested in you--and that interest may be reciprocated--but because they didn't see it on your profile, they might not express interest in you.WaterBunnie wrote: »I don't agree with this. There are just as many shy men out there who won't make first contact with someone they fear would give them the brush off. People soon get a good idea of who's after what and if you simply wait for someone to come to you it could mean you miss out on someone great.
Regardless of gender, it's always worth a shot if you see someone who piques your interest.0
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