I'm feeling really disheartened...

amandahassinger
amandahassinger Posts: 2 Member
edited November 2024 in Motivation and Support
I know it's only been about 2 weeks, but I'm feeling very disheartened by this whole endeavor. I just wanted to tone up my midsection before my wedding. Just a bit, maybe. But it seems like it's only getting worse! Let me explain. I'm a 26 year old kidney transplant patient. I'm eating fresh, staying around 1500 calories, working out (weights, stretches and cardio), and I AM losing weight, but the more I lose, the more my transplant seems to bulge out. I'm wondering if I should just give it up before everyone can see through my wedding dress how disfigured my stomach really is...I just want to be beautiful for him and all that's happening is I feel more like a freak than ever...Why should I try to get leaner when I just keep distending on one side? I'm not fat, nor am I trying to get too skinny. I just don't see the point when it seems pretty hopeless. Worse even, it seems to make matters worse. Am I doing something wrong? Are there any transplant patients on here that could help? I just don't see the point right now...I think I'll always look lumpy and there's nothing I can do about it...

Replies

  • SisterSueGetsFit
    SisterSueGetsFit Posts: 1,211 Member
    I would talk to A kidney transplant specialist.
  • thatthingyoudoula
    thatthingyoudoula Posts: 30 Member
    I would speak to a doctor and nutritionist.
  • blues4miles
    blues4miles Posts: 1,481 Member
    amandahassinger wrote: »
    I just want to be beautiful for him and all that's happening is I feel more like a freak than ever.

    I would consider speaking to a therapist. You are NOT A freak.

  • amandahassinger
    amandahassinger Posts: 2 Member
    Maybe you're all right. Thanks.
  • SBHWeav
    SBHWeav Posts: 89 Member
    amandahassinger wrote: »
    .I just want to be beautiful for him

    Oh honey. You ARE beautiful to him. He loves you and is choosing to spend the rest of his life with you. You're perfect to him.
  • ames105
    ames105 Posts: 288 Member
    SBHWeav wrote: »
    amandahassinger wrote: »
    .I just want to be beautiful for him

    Oh honey. You ARE beautiful to him. He loves you and is choosing to spend the rest of his life with you. You're perfect to him.

    I agree with above.

    Don't put so much pressure on yourself. Everyone wants their wedding day to be perfect. You, in your dress, walking towards your husband-to-be, will be perfect. Nothing else matters.

    As a transplant patient, I'm going to assume you've had some health issues. I'm sure your family, friends and future in-laws are happy just to have you with them, to be there. The options could be worse.

    If you are concerned, you should speak with your doctor and your surgeon. Beyond that, you may have to accept that your stomach will not be perfectly flat. Look at it in the same way I do my stretch marks. It shows where you were, what you've been through and tells part of your life story. Don't be ashamed of it, be proud.

    Finally, getting more lean and healthy can only be GOOD for your kidneys. Its beneficial to you and that's only a good thing too.

    Congratulations on your upcoming wedding!
  • bri170lb
    bri170lb Posts: 1,375 Member
    I am sure that your fiance would be happy if you were green with purple spots BECAUSE YOU ARE A SURVIVOR AND YOU BOTH ARE GETTING A CHANCE TO COMMIT YOUR LIVES TO EACH OTHER!!! He is going to be dazzled by your beauty on your wedding day, scars, sticky outy places, bumps, bulges, pimples and all, because he loves ALL OF YOU.

    It does sound to me like you should consult your doctor about this. Maybe there is a physical therapist who specializes in helping transplant patients to get back into shape.
  • hopeandtheabsurd
    hopeandtheabsurd Posts: 265 Member
    I don't know if this is OK with a transplant, but good shapewear is a sanity-saver underneath form fitting clothing like a wedding dress.

    Your future husband knows what you look like and loves you the way you are, lumps and all! (If not, that's a much bigger issue that would not be solved with weight loss).
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