What am I doing wrong?

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Hello guys I'm trying to get myself to a better me! I've been watching what I eat, logging my foods. I'm currently doing low carb, high protein diet: carbs: 119g (30%), fats:53g (30%), protein: 158g (40% of daily intake). I just started back with my journey, which I initially started somewhere after Dec 2014 at 314. The last two days I've been substituting my meals for cup of spinach, cup of mixed frozen fruit and 1 scoop of walmart body fortress whey protein powder (200 cals per scoop). I'm trying to get the thoughts of snacking out of my mind, because in the past I quickly go overboard. Most of the things in my house are healthy but in the past id eat them excessively(=no cal deficiency). I've started back walking 45 mins to an hour... I was doing this daily but was told to alternate days with full body work outs?? I just started allowing my husband to train me again... he lean well built man. But his ideas about getting fit, I'm not there yet. I have to cut the fat first so eat less and strength train. He thinks the answer is always work out. I can't go another entire year without losing more weight than I did last year. I have 3 children trying to get into nursing school and I want to be healthier to help my family and others. But who's wants to listen to the fat chick about taking care of your body. Lol. I wouldnt! My stomach is the area of my body that makes me most uncomfortable it's just there hanging! Uggh. I love to eat guys but I'm so tired allowing this to control so much of my life!

Replies

  • seska422
    seska422 Posts: 3,217 Member
    edited February 2016
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    Honestly, I think you are trying to change too much at once. Make small changes that you can live with forever, eat at a calorie deficit, and the weight will slowly come off.

    I've lost weight by eating foods that I like but in smaller portions and with some different choices within those foods. Exercise is great but not required for weight loss.

    If you eat at a deficit and are patient, you'll lose weight.
  • taisha01
    taisha01 Posts: 4 Member
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    Hi! Just wanted to say good luck on your weight lost journey! You can do this. What I usually do to stop my snacking is eating a cup of ice. I realized that Im not actually hungry but have the urge to chew! Maybe it might help. Good luck! :)
  • mrsfabbanks
    mrsfabbanks Posts: 49 Member
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    seska422 wrote: »
    Honestly, I think you are trying to change too much. Make small changes that you can live with forever, eat at a calorie deficit, and the weight will slowly come off.

    I've lost weight by eating foods that I like but in smaller portions and with some different choices within those foods. Exercise is great but not required for weight loss.

    If you eat at a deficit and are patient, you'll lose weight.

    I forgot to mention I'm going on a little vacation next month so I have been pushing a little harder. I really want my routines to be correct to get this optimum results! My initial changes started into 2014. I've seen people lose 100 lbs in 9 months so I didn't think I was doing enough, because I'm not where I need to be. Before having my children I was fit after losing a substantial amount of weight(played alot of basket ball and soccer) and then I let myself go. I want to get back to those days, running and enjoying life. Not to mention my appearance in my clothing!
  • mrsfabbanks
    mrsfabbanks Posts: 49 Member
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    taisha01 wrote: »
    Hi! Just wanted to say good luck on your weight lost journey! You can do this. What I usually do to stop my snacking is eating a cup of ice. I realized that Im not actually hungry but have the urge to chew! Maybe it might help. Good luck! :)
    Thank you Taisha! I will try that. Because I usually know I'm not hungry, I've just always like to eat what I want despite the fact that I may have just eaten! I just don't want that for my children, my mother to this day is same!
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
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    seska422 wrote: »
    Honestly, I think you are trying to change too much at once. Make small changes that you can live with forever, eat at a calorie deficit, and the weight will slowly come off.

    I've lost weight by eating foods that I like but in smaller portions and with some different choices within those foods. Exercise is great but not required for weight loss.

    If you eat at a deficit and are patient, you'll lose weight.

    This 100%
    By substituting meals with spinach, frozen fruit, you will quickly develop strong cravings.(and most likely give in to them)
    One thing I have learned is if it is me against the cravings, the cravings always win. For me it was to eat enough of what I want but to weigh/measure it out.
    Eat the foods you enjoy, try and eat less of the high calorie foods and fill up on lean protein and healthy fats such as avocado, olive oil, coconut oil and even butter. Fat is not bad! Fat will satisfy you and keep you full longer. Macros are important but at first concentrate on the calorie deficit. Make sure you are at a good daily calorie goal. I like this calculator:

    http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/

    Good luck!!
  • mrsfabbanks
    mrsfabbanks Posts: 49 Member
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    seska422 wrote: »
    Honestly, I think you are trying to change too much at once. Make small changes that you can live with forever, eat at a calorie deficit, and the weight will slowly come off.

    I've lost weight by eating foods that I like but in smaller portions and with some different choices within those foods. Exercise is great but not required for weight loss.

    If you eat at a deficit and are patient, you'll lose weight.

    This 100%
    By substituting meals with spinach, frozen fruit, you will quickly develop strong cravings.(and most likely give in to them)
    One thing I have learned is if it is me against the cravings, the cravings always win. For me it was to eat enough of what I want but to weigh/measure it out.
    Eat the foods you enjoy, try and eat less of the high calorie foods and fill up on lean protein and healthy fats such as avocado, olive oil, coconut oil and even butter. Fat is not bad! Fat will satisfy you and keep you full longer. Macros are important but at first concentrate on the calorie deficit. Make sure you are at a good daily calorie goal. I like this calculator:

    http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/

    Good luck!!

    Thanks for your response! The things I enjoy eating are typically not good for me. I've always love the junk food! Nachos, pizza, burgers, bread, bread, cheese, chocolate, chips and more cheese. I truly don't understand how to eat these things and still lose weight? I'm currently set at 1560 in Daily CALORIES Intake. Is this too high or just right?
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
    edited February 2016
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    can you tell me your age, height, weight and activity level? Activity level is just a guess...I put in sedentary for me since I have a desk job. If you don't want to post it, you can message me and I'll plug the numbers in.
    As far as liking the foods that are not good for you, you can change this but it takes time. It doesn't happen over night. So allow yourself a burger for lunch,a slice of pizza, cheese, even chocolate. I eat dark chocolate every day, and most days I have a bag of chips for around 150-200 calories.
    I know some people have a hard time eating just a "little" of something. Once they start, they cant stop. I am like that with certain snack foods so I stay away from them but I still make sure everything I eat is something I enjoy.
    Today I had 4 slices of cheddar cheese, I logged the calories and if I have to skimp on dinner, I do. I will post some great links for you too. Send me or post the info if you want a second opinion on calorie intake.

    I will add, nice warm crusty bread is also very tough for me to stop eating once I stop. But for me if I avoid all carbs, I will crave them like crazy so I try and get a little bread/rice in daily
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
    edited February 2016
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    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants/p1

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1296011/calorie-counting-101/p1

    This is a lot of reading but it is filled with excellent tips and help!

    Did you ever watch a skinny person eat? They eat everything that a heavy person does, but they know when to stop. It's a wonderful thing when you can do this...
  • seska422
    seska422 Posts: 3,217 Member
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    It sounds like both you and your mother have been yo-yo dieters. That's what happens when you change everything to lose weight and then go back to your preferred foods after you've lost weight.

    The key to maintaining weight loss is to find a way of eating that works for you long term.

    I love chocolate. I eat a 35 calorie Hershey's Dark Chocolate Bliss every day for my chocolate fix. I know that I'll have chocolate every day so I don't crave it because I know it's coming.

    I like batter-fried fish and I like baked fish. I mostly eat fish baked now but, if I really want battered, I'll go buy one battered piece and work that into my calorie budget.

    I like bread. If I want bread with my dinner I eat it but I look at my calorie budget and generally eat one slice where I might have eaten two slices every time before.

    I eat cheese. I actually prefer the reduced fat cheese but full fat would work. I decide how many grams fit into my calorie budget and then weigh out that much on my food scale.

    I eat chips. The bag says that a serving is 28 grams but I've found that I'm satisfied with a 20 gram serving so that's what I eat.

    I love pizza. I get a Lean Cuisine or DiGiorno and bake it at home and weigh my portion and work it into my calorie budget.

    The food scale allows me to eat anything I want but in a manageable portion. I'm learning how to eat my foods but still lose weight and maintain that weight once I reach my goal. If I don't learn how I'm going to eat at goal then I'll regain.
  • mrsfabbanks
    mrsfabbanks Posts: 49 Member
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    I'm 28,5'4, 297, sedentary, thanks!
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
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    When I put in sedentary, with a very aggressive weight loss goal I am getting 1900-2000 calories/day. Remember this is really dependent on the accuracy of your calorie counting. If you do this accurately you will lose weight eating 1900-2000 calories/day.
    You have to re-run your numbers as you lose weight so when you get down to 287, your daily calorie intake will go down just a little.
    It is all trial and error so whatever you decide to stick to, give it a couple weeks then go down if you're not losing or up if you are losing too fast.
    I think 1560 is too low for you to start. You will lose, but it may be difficult to sustain. At 1900 calories/day you will be able to enjoy some of the foods you are used to and try cutting back slower. Pretty soon your body will stop craving the junk as much, I promise, but it takes time!!
  • mrsfabbanks
    mrsfabbanks Posts: 49 Member
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    Does this factor in me newly starting working out 3-4 times a week? Honestly the 1900-2000 cal amount frightens me lol. I'm honestly so over being over weight, going back and fourth. Last year I went to 282 (means nothing to others but the world to me) but the holidays rolled around I lost control. I just wish that this wasn't so hard for me. Thanks again for your help, I'm going to look at the link you provided.
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
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    Is your husband putting any pressure on you? Such as what you eat and how or when you exercise? I hope not.

    As far as where you are right now at 28 years old and almost 300 pounds and sedentary, I would take all that you described here (your children, your mother, your career, etc..) and make a pros and cons list and put the date on it when you wrote it. Just go with me for a minute.

    Start this list and finish it.. does not matter if you take a couple of days. When you are finished with it, put it in a safe place and put it away. Next create you a plan. Start out with small goals. Such as 1) walking every day 45 minutes 2) eat exactly what the MFP deficit tells me to eat 3) if you can muster up lifting right now then do it (or set this aside until you have lost some weight, to me this is secondary to the deficit and doing some walking around since you are sedentary).

    Set you a small mini goal, of 3 weeks or 4 weeks of walking and eating the deficit. During this time you are making small choices that can lead to bigger ones down the road.

    Give your body time to take in the changes and start seeing results and let these results motivate you to keep going. Then set you another set of goals and so forth.. It does not have to be X number of pounds or X number of miles to walk, it just has to be inline with what you wrote on the pros and cons list.

    Loosing weight is not like quitting smoking where you create a deadline to stop, this is a forever decision that effects you not only today, but every day from here on out. This takes time, diligences and commitment and not only changing your body, but changing your mind. And when you make shifts in your thinking every single day the body will follow every single time.. You cannot do this in a day, or even a week or month.

    Get a SUPPORT SYTEM and get your husband on board with your line of thinking and your way you need to do this.

    When you need a motivator, pull out that pros and cons list. Look at the date, and see where you are and if you are struggling, you have to reach out to those who care about you and are on board so have that SUPPORT SYTEM in line.

    We here at MFP never go away... A lot of us have been here for years!!
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
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    this calorie counter has been pretty accurate for me. I know it scares you. But the #1 reason people fail is they try to do too much too fast. Just because you start at 1900, doesn't mean after 2 weeks you cant drop to 1800. But I am 100 % confident that you will lose...if you are measuring and logging accurately.
    Those links I left you are fantastic...read them at your leisure, make learning about this a hobby. I was 47 before I finally figured it out so you are way ahead of me and have your whole life to figure this out.
    Remember as you lose weight this number will drop. Starting out at 1900-2000 is very reasonable for someone your age and weight. Enjoy the extra calories for now!!
    I now maintain at around 1400-1500 calories/day. But I am 50 and weigh 135 now....

    "but the holidays rolled around I lost control" This is KEY!! You shouldn't lose control at the holidays. This was because you were depriving yourself. I let myself enjoy Christmas dinner or a special occasion but it lasts one night and then back on track the next day. This is not a "diet" It will become your new lifestyle! and you can learn to embrace it!!! :)
  • debsdoingthis
    debsdoingthis Posts: 454 Member
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    Hi OP, I started (again) at 280 last year. I am also 5'4" I chose to eat the way I want to eat for the rest of my life this time as opposed to cutting out the foods I love and consuming farrrr fewer calories than were sustainable.
    I suspect the 1560 you have set is going to get old really fast. At your weight, you most DEFINITELY can lose weight, and not feel totally deprived with higher calories. If you are anything like me, it may take a bit to wrap your head around that concept. Making small changes and keeping those new habits will lead to another change and so on and so on. BTW I set my calorie goal to 1850 to start and when I did do some heart pounding, sweaty exercise I ate about 50% of the extra calorie burn back. You can do this!

    Anytime you need some extra support, just reach out and we'll be there!

  • mrsfabbanks
    mrsfabbanks Posts: 49 Member
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    gia07 wrote: »
    Is your husband putting any pressure on you? Such as what you eat and how or when you exercise? I hope not.

    As far as where you are right now at 28 years old and almost 300 pounds and sedentary, I would take all that you described here (your children, your mother, your career, etc..) and make a pros and cons list and put the date on it when you wrote it. Just go with me for a minute.

    Start this list and finish it.. does not matter if you take a couple of days. When you are finished with it, put it in a safe place and put it away. Next create you a plan. Start out with small goals. Such as 1) walking every day 45 minutes 2) eat exactly what the MFP deficit tells me to eat 3) if you can muster up lifting right now then do it (or set this aside until you have lost some weight, to me this is secondary to the deficit and doing some walking around since you are sedentary).

    Set you a small mini goal, of 3 weeks or 4 weeks of walking and eating the deficit. During this time you are making small choices that can lead to bigger ones down the road.

    Give your body time to take in the changes and start seeing results and let these results motivate you to keep going. Then set you another set of goals and so forth.. It does not have to be X number of pounds or X number of miles to walk, it just has to be inline with what you wrote on the pros and cons list.

    Loosing weight is not like quitting smoking where you create a deadline to stop, this is a forever decision that effects you not only today, but every day from here on out. This takes time, diligences and commitment and not only changing your body, but changing your mind. And when you make shifts in your thinking every single day the body will follow every single time.. You cannot do this in a day, or even a week or month.

    Get a SUPPORT SYTEM and get your husband on board with your line of thinking and your way you need to do this.

    When you need a motivator, pull out that pros and cons list. Look at the date, and see where you are and if you are struggling, you have to reach out to those who care about you and are on board so have that SUPPORT SYTEM in line.

    We here at MFP never go away... A lot of us have been here for years!!

    This is a great plan of action and i going to do it! My husband and I have been married on the 27th for 8 years and he has loved me unconditionally exactly where I am. He just let's me know that's he there to help me when I'm ready. He's just familiar with how it's to be done for me.
  • glitterrainn
    glitterrainn Posts: 73 Member
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    Thanks for your response! The things I enjoy eating are typically not good for me. I've always love the junk food! Nachos, pizza, burgers, bread, bread, cheese, chocolate, chips and more cheese. I truly don't understand how to eat these things and still lose weight? I'm currently set at 1560 in Daily CALORIES Intake. Is this too high or just right?

    This was me. I decided that I was gonna eat healthy and show my kids what it is to eat healthy also. They were my motivation. My husband is also on a weight loss journey, so that helped my motivation even more.

    I agree start slow. Start eating a good healthy breakfast, it will help you throughout the day. Meal plan. Buy healthy snacks instead of cookies. I've noticed for myself if I stay on the outer ring I buy less crappy food and more healthy food. Don't go into that inner ring unless you need too. I like to eat Boom chicka pop, so good and not too bad as a snack! Do daily mantra's. They help! Really! Put some on your bathroom mirror or in your bedroom! I have a nice positive picture on the background of my computer that I read everyday. It helps, so much. It reassures me I can do this and I will be successful.

    You can still eat healthy and have some indulgences! You just can't over eat and if you do, maybe you should just avoid them all together. I have found buying frozen yogurt satisfies my sugar cravings after dinner. It's so good and only 100cals a serving. I also make an awesome sausage alfredo which is super yum and still fulfilling with 1 portion size!

    We used to eat pizza every other friday like it was nobodys business. I could down half a pizza in one sitting. It makes me nauseous now that I think about that. I've noticed since eating healthy I don't crave the sugars and sweets like I used to. I used to eat Franz chocolate donuts and now I can't even finish one after a month of eating better and tracking my cals.

    You can friend me if you'd like!